Hi all - out of the 'Truth' for 14 years and it still affects me.... (page 2)

Scooby

http://www.csicop.org/si/2000-11/beliefs.html

Thanks to others on this board... This website helped me alot.

It seems as though the journies we take to find ourselves and our spirituality is very familiar. I left the borg in my late 30's after being in since I was 14. I was so messed up that I couldn't even open a bible for some twenty years. I can't say that I was really free of them, because they were still in my cognitive vision and haunted me in the light of day and in the dark of night. Like a horrible load of baggage that I carried around with me....fearful to totally abandon it by the wayside, yet knowing, the weight of it was literally killing me, heart and soul.

Just a couple years ago, I decided that I had to bring everything "up" again, so I could figure out what I wanted out of life. Like you, I began to research and study and figure out what I really did believe..what was founded on truth, and what was just someone elses idea. I took that old JW bible off the shelf. It was THE only piece of religious literature I had left, and the only reason why I kept it, is because my father (deceased) wrote something personal in the front of it. I went out and got other modern translations, and many other books to help me. Along the way, I discovered that the bible was just a mix-match of writings. A historical history of a certain nation, with other interesting stuff written by enlightened men. But, my heart told me that it was written by man. All the dogma of organized religion, along with cults such as JW's just had no place in reality and common sense--and I read them all, the book of Mormon, the Koran, and Eastern Religions.

Like you, I longed to find where my spirituality fit in. I began to "ask" my universal creator(s) for help and guidance, and after years and years of not praying at all, some answers opened up to me. Perhaps it was just the "letting go" and getting my perceptions about so much of my life in the proper perspective, but so much changed for me. It was quite painful and took a lot of personal initiative and perseverance, but it paid off.

You are moving forward now, and you will find your way. There is much good information on here and on the internet. You can read and look to your heart's content, and not have to worry that someone is breathing down your neck for "seeking truth" outside of the JW mindset. You will find many who have found another religion, others have no religion, and others who just follow their heart. I look forward to reading more of your posts, as you enjoy the real freedom from bondage.

JamesThomas

Dawn

Hi Mandybp - and welcome:

I have one piece of advice for you (well - really, lots of advice, but I won't bore you with it all right now)

Ask your questions. Ask them all - don't be afraid to ask anything - and don't be afraid to research. I was afraid to question for so long and that is what kept me locked in the darkness for so long. When you get that scared feeling that "what if they're right?..." just remember whatever is TRUTH with stand up to any amount of scrutiny.

God bless you in your search for the truth.

Mandybp

I am totally blown away by your responses, this is an awesome board by the looks of it. Thank you all so much.

Prisca :) Thanks for your reply and the link, it looks very useful.

Goshawk :) Yup I'll remember to smell the roses, I think that's something I didn't do as a Witness.

Big Tex :) " I'll do the best I can with this life, trust that God will show me what I need and let everything else go. If that makes any sense." Yeah it makes perfect sense - thanks for your response :)

Scooby :) Thanks for the link - it looks like a really good article.

Sentinel :) The Borg - I think that's so funny - how delightfully irrevelant *grins*. It really was bondage eh (scuse my kiwi eh's)

James Thomas :) LOL - luv it - so true!

Dawn :) Thanks for your welcome and input - I look forward to hearing more from you and I sure will question, question, question *smiles*

minimus

Hi Mandy and welcome to JWD!!! I have a question for you. How did you just happen to find us here and what made you post???

Mandybp

Hi Minimus :) Wellll, I've been checking out Christian forums lately and thought I'd put JW into the search engine and see what came up (I couldn't remember most of the teachings and felt it useful to find out what I used to believe in comparison with what Christendom believes). I found another site similar to this (but not so busy from what I can gather, I haven't posted there though). When I found this place I was quite simply blown away, you all seem such lovely people and so concerned to help each other out and support each other.

This in combination with this recent questioning re religion. It's taken 14 years to even think about opening a Bible, in fact I've done some interesting study in other areas (can you say Wicca *grins*), it's like I had to go totally the other way when I came out of the 'Truth', explored auric healing, tarot cards (can u imagine how that was first of all? lol), astrology - all the things we were told not to study I have. Thing is now I've come back to thinking about Christianity, which has brought these scriptural/dogma questions to the fore. I'm trying to unlearn what I've learned if u know what I mean.

This is such a cool site - with such cool people - it's wonderful to find ex witnesses to process this stuff with :)

cowhand

Welcome Mandybp

I,m very new here myself and I would have loved to have been able to visit a site like this myself when i left the witnesses back in 1982. I often wished that I could have some chat with someone who understood what I had left behind and had no particular view about where I should go from there.

To this day I steer clear of any kind of religious organisation.

I couldn't begin to advise you as to your next move. If you're still drawn to the Bible then read it. It can do no harm.

I have in the last few days read both Ray Franz's book "Crisis of Conscience" and Diane Wilsons "Awakening of a Jehovah's Witness". I thought they were both pretty devastating.

And yes, keep coming back to these posts. I wish I could write like some of these people.

Welcome again.

PS.....No, I don't quite know what I'm doing here either. I really thought I had them out of my system.

outnfree

Just wanted to pop in and say

WELCOME, MANDYBP!!!

There are some here who have been out way longer than you, and others who are relative "newbies" -- I DA'd myself about 2 years ago.

Like Lyin', I went through a period of reading the Bible and learning what it actually says. Then I attended a non-denominational church and a Women (only) 's Bible Study group which was quite refreshing. Then I signed up for a special class and ACK!!!! they were trying to force me to conform again, so I said no to that! Now I occasionally attend mass with my husband and son, who are Catholic (my son very recently) just to offer some solidarity. The JW years were quite divisive. Can't see myself ever becoming Catholic, but there IS something very appealing about Jesus, isn't there? But also about Ghandi???? ...

It's hard for non-ex-JWs to relate, so this place is a godsend (SimonAngsend?). I look foward to seeing more of your posts.

In fact, I'd like to hear your thoughts on auric healing sometime ...

outnfree

JT

http://www.csicop.org/si/2000-11/beliefs.html

Thanks to others on this board... This website helped me alot.

this was a site that helped me as well. esp in terms of WHY FOLKS DON'T LEAVE after reading facts, proof, evdence, etc

Hi all - out of the 'Truth' for 14 years and it still affects me....

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