Reddit thread on convention video urging cutting off contact with Faders

by LongHairGal 35 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  TonusOH

  LongHairGal: Now, they are being threatened with loss of association with their loved ones and friends.

  My reply to that is: "don't threaten me with a good time."
• 

  LongHairGal

  TONUSOH:

  I’m sorry for the pain these Witnesses can cause to people who left the religion…No wonder you’re thrilled to not have them associating with you.

  As an earlier poster LITTLEROCKGUY pointed out: they carry a ‘bad’ energy about them.. Even though I wasn’t raised JW and have no relatives there, I don’t want this energy in my life - which is why it’s no real loss that my Witness ‘friends’ are finally gone.👍🏻

  I pinpointed this unwanted energy early in my ‘Fade’ when I stopped going to meetings and realized how good it felt to be away from the JW religion! ..This was not a coincidence.
• 

  Mikejw

  Many large multigenerational JW families have family members only staying physically in for other family members. When the parents die, the other members are starting to fade.

  they are openly talking about things at the funerals that the only reason they stayed physically in was because of the elderly parents who just died.

  its as if they didn’t want to tell their elderly parents they didn’t believe the GB anymore. If they did it would be very cruel for an elderly one to hear just before they die.

  this is probably true all around the world. Sunk cost fallacy and not wanting elderly relatives to understand they have wasted their lives believing something that was lies.

  siblings can now openly talk about how they were mislead into making decisions decades ago based on the lie that the end would come soon.

  now they are elderly themselves

  no wonder this convention is trying to do damage control but it’s backfiring.

  all the changes that you can now talk to disfellowshiped ones, but they are saying cut off those who are physically in but mentally questioning
• 

  TonusOH

  LongHairGal: I don’t want this energy in my life

  Exactly. I knew too many people (including relatives) whose viewpoint was that the world was ending soon and life would not truly begin until after Armageddon. They wanted to get to the end with as little effort as possible, because they felt it didn't matter what you accomplished in the 'old system.' The 'new system' is when they can finally begin to live.

  My mother has wasted almost sixty years of her life, now. Still waiting, still doing nothing with her life aside from wondering what the new system will be like. She depends on others and has no compunction about taking advantage of them, since Jehovah will settle all debts in the end. She would never consider herself a 'taker,' but she drained a LOT of my time and money as she waited for an end that is now some 50 years overdue.

  It is tragic, that the people who would shun me are the people I am perfectly happy being shunned by. This is what they do to families and to individuals. I'm glad enough I was able to get out mostly intact, but there is always a price that is paid when families become fragmented thanks to their policies and beliefs. I spent many years taking care of my mother, but these days we hardly speak. If there is no money to be squeezed from me, she would just as soon not bother.
• 

  DesirousOfChange

  Sunk cost fallacy and not wanting elderly relatives to understand they have wasted their lives believing something that was lies. . . . . siblings can now openly talk about how they were mislead into making decisions decades ago based on the lie that the end would come soon. . . . now they are elderly themselves

  The phrase I highlighted is the sad part. If you wait and wait so as to not offend others (ie, parents) you find out that now you are too old to start over too and you have been robbed of more years of your own life.
• 

  LongHairGal

  TONUS:

  I have to assume your mom is a widow and that she has never worked. She sounds helpless -but much of the helplessness she has is learned.

  Your name doesn’t indicate gender so I assume you’re a man. You are a good son to do what you did for her.

  The very beliefs and attitudes of Jehovah’s Witnesses turn many of them into very accomplished ‘Takers’.. Of course, some are worse than others.. In the world, many non-Witness women are widowed or otherwise without a man. They usually get a job. Your mom didn’t… The idiot religion is responsible for this attitude.

  I was not born-in but came in a young working woman. So, I was APPALLED at this pervasive mentality in the Witness religion. You never saw ME giving anything to deadbeat pioneers. Nope! Not after how I was criticized for working. What kind of chump would I be??🤣

  And I never accepted the underlying ‘hint’ in the Witness religion that people could be in full-time ministry and EXPECT other people in the congregation to support them or give them things!! What delusions. (Of course, they never reveal this when you are ‘studying’.)

  ..Didn’t care if the Witnesses hated me because of this and I DO believe some did… Imagine me being there now with all those who reached retirement age unprepared ??? 😮 I will stay a ‘Fader’.

  I don’t blame you for being glad all those Users, Takers and manipulators avoid you.