Hatred From My Children for Not Leaving the Organization Earlier (page 3)

hybridous

Then tell him to pull his head out and look forward not back.

As I got older and no doubt because of so many ayahuasca sessions I was able to recall past trauma as a infant/child and had to deal with feelings towards my parents who were both dead, it was helpful as it explained some of my behavior towards them and the reason for many of my actions. As I came to accept my self and I also came to accept my parents as all products of our environment and social indoctrination with no need to hate them or me because we are all in the same boat driven by the same wind etc...which lead to a new found respect and admiration for my parents.

You did the best you could with what you had available, just as I hope your children will do also

zeb

Our kids never missed out on gifts.

But for the past few years I have been giving them something on their birth-days and as they have come along to their kids as well.

I never did like the no birthday things I saw it as (controlling) crap! I asked an elder about it and he said if 'allowed' then people would go silly and go over the top. So their sense of the spiritual is just a coat of paint.

My response is if they do 'go over the top' then they are not humble, sensible but are superficial.

Look what happens with with wedding anniversaries, and what of the celebrations for 15 yo jw girls in latino countries!!

new boy

I have forgiving my messed up parents for the bull shit they handed down to me. My son was in it for only 21 years and me over 50.

But your right I do need to apologize to him.

As they say "The road to hell is paved with good intentions."

Funny isn't it how we all want some slack cut for ourselves but justice for everyone else.

Hey Broken Back Watchtower I truly love you man but remember we can't talk about Ayahuasca here or anything else that might expand ones conscience.

humbled

Funny isn't it how we all want some slack cut for ourselves but justice for everyone else.

Right. The take away is to cut some slack to everyone else..

That wasn’t the training in the religion we all left. This is what love really is though. “Forgive is our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us”.

This is the final scar we suffer. But we don’t have to carry this through for generations. Think about it.

Brokeback Watchtower

We as humans make many mistakes in life the trick is to learn from them, when I think about my parents now who are in the here after in this computer simulation I look at them as souls that have passed through this life many times with lesson to learn,,. I miss them and wish them the best where ever they are. Your sons need to sort things out which probably will come in latter years of development, right now they are in a blaming stag which hopefully will pass as they see the bigger picture.

caves

@ newboy -I have forgiving my messed up parents for the bull shit they handed down to me. My son was in it for only 21 years and me over 50.

But your right I do need to apologize to him.

As they say "The road to hell is paved with good intentions."

Funny isn't it how we all want some slack cut for ourselves but justice for everyone else.

My son is 24. I was 16 when he was born and I was a jw. He just vocalized a year ago that he doesn't care about me.There was much hate in his message and it crushed me. But does not know me(long story). I guess I dont know him either.

However what you just said and this whole thread makes me feel like I will apologize to him in a way I never have before, if I can get a hold of him. He was my world from when he was born to age 6 after the divorce. I was broken . The road to hell is indeed paved with good intentions. ( Never before has that statement meant as much to me as it does right now) I have been frozen in my own trauma that I have overlooked his feelings on some things. How sad. Sigh , at long last I see what I need to do with my own situation. However he takes it will be his own process and however hard it might be for me to swallow it, I must honor that it is his process. I now know I am not alone. This gives me some small measure of comfort. My situation is very different , but it broke lose crystallization in my ways of thinking Ive been holding on to.

I wish you the best in your journey and wanted you to know that I appreciate you posting this.

I wish for anyone going thru this to not blame themselves to the point that you make yourself out to be a horrible person.

Caves

smiddy3

I wouldn`t beat myself up too much about it new boy we did what we thought was best for our children at the time .

We are not perfect and we make mistakes like everybody else including our children

Their is no need for him to hold a grudge against you and try to make you feel guilty over what is past.Your son needs to take a chill pill and realize that what he does with his life now is what counts .

He, your son is in charge of his own destiny and nobody else ,not you ,or the religion .

How his life turns out is entirely up to him and the choices he makes in life.

Vidiot

new boy - "... the other half leave and make their break to freedom..."

More like two thirds, actually.

john.prestor

New boy, you and your son are going to be okay in the long-run. You'll talk to him, you'll apologize, you'll hear him out, and you guys will move past this.

Hatred From My Children for Not Leaving the Organization Earlier

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