After 60 Years She is Heading Out!

by The Bethelite 14 Replies latest jw friends

  •  The Bethelite
    The Bethelite

    If you read my book "New Boy" I talked about a girl I met in 1972 at a convention in Allentown PA. I fell in love with her at first sight.

    However a problem came up a couple of months later, when I met and fell in love with my future wife, Debbie.

    Both women's mothers didn't like me at all (go figure) and it was literally a coin toss between the two women.

    I choose Debbie. Well if you read the book you know where that road went for almost 40 years.

    Fast forward, the Pennsylvania woman Gayle tracked me down in 2010. She hadn't forgot about me. She told me she was very surprised and disappointed in me for leaving the tooth.

    She was so crushed after I dumped her, she married the first guy to come along and got married to a self righteous elder. She said, she knew it was a mistake as they were walking down the aisle! She had 4 daughters with him. However, he was an abusive piece of shit and she had an affair with a "worldly man" and finally got the affection she needed. However she got pregnant with this this new guy.

    What a mess. She of course got Dfed and crawled back to her JW husband and Jehover. However the abuse was now worse than ever. She couldn't handle it anymore and left her husband and married the worldly guy. But because of her guilt of being a "bad" mother and the situation, the Witness husband got custody of all 5 children even the one that wasn't his!

    After a couple of years of legal battles she finally got her baby back but the other 4 girls were stuck with their father....

    After many years of shame and wearing "the Scarlet letter" in the back of the kingdom hall she was finally let back into the fold. However, the "brothers" never really forget do they. She is invited to very few "Witness" functions.

    When she contacted me, she was still a believer, anyway she is the only Jehovah's Witness that didn't shunn me and we have been good friends and have been talking to each other these last 10 years.

    Well, my book came out on April 19, 2019 and of course she got one of the first copies and read the whole thing in just 2 days!

    She didn't know about the whole JWs and the United Nations thing and of course all the other bull shit that when on at the headquarters. I sent her Ray's Book too and that was the final straw.

    She has started her fade now after 60 years a Watchtower slave.... However, this can be difficult as all know. She still has a couple of her daughters are still "in" along with grandchildren.

    Good Job Gayle.....

    No matter how long you have been in "The Borg" you too can escape!

  • hoser
    hoser

    It’s never to late.

  • joe134cd
    joe134cd

    Im in a similar situation to this, with regard to my elderly father, so I’m really in two minds. Provided the religion meets the needs of the individual, what’s the best course of action in awakening. Do I press the issue and try to awaken him, or do I leave him as is? I have chosen the latter.

    For me it has created a love hate relationship regarding Wt. Nothing would bring me more satisfaction to see it go down in a massive blaze of glory. However, if things do turn for the worst, I hope it can be delayed long enough to out last my lovely Dad. To awaken him at 67 would just send him to an early grave. It occupies him, gives him something to do and a social net work. So for that I’m grateful.

    Not being DFed either has made for a much smoother operation in providing care and support for him. I can intermingle with them in the operation of his life.

    Well that’s my take, but I’m glade that your friend is happy with her situation in awakening.

  • JoenB75
    JoenB75
    JWs have very different experiences. Some enjoy high status, great social life and maybe dont believe all they read in the mag. Some live much stricter lifes.
  •  The Bethelite
    The Bethelite

    "your friend is happy with her situation in awakening."

    I don't how happy she is with over 2 dozen family members still in and her trying to fade. It has created a whole new world of problems for sure.

    That's what happens when you take the "red pill"

  • Beth Sarim
    Beth Sarim

    Wow!! 60 years in the Borg and now 'fading-out'. Yeah, well you never know. You hear statements from Dubs all the time that they never ever thought they would become JW's.

  • LongHairGal
    LongHairGal

    JOENB75:

    You got that right about some JWs having very different experiences in the religion.

    In other words, everybody was not equally damaged and in fact some were not damaged at all and had a great time there. People who were part of extended families had it pretty well.

    I truly believe that I as a single working woman was at the bottom of the barrel in the Witness religion.

    I was knocked for having a full time job;..targeted to do favors for Users in the religion who imagined I was fair game (they got nowhere with me);..had people being jealous imagining I ‘owed’ somebody something and that single people ‘had no problems’;..perceived as a sexual threat and I certainly was NOT after anybody’s husband. The list goes on.

    Thankfully, I wasn’t born-in and resisted all this garbage and held on to my job until I Retired.

  • JoenB75
    JoenB75

    LongHairGal,

    I can only imagine. Lots of hierachy and peer pressure. In the last days of her attending my mother refered to herself and other low status sisters as "sister zero'.

  • LongHairGal
    LongHairGal

    JOENB75:

    Now they can really call me sister zero because I’m not there!..Their abusive attitudes made it easy for me to ‘fade’!

    I’d never want to be there now!..Any of my age ‘peers’ who shunned me as ‘unspiritual’ because of my job..well I hope they can pay their bills..I certainly wouldn’t give them anything!..All those older ladies who held special gatherings and told them how wonderful and blessed they are have passed away and can’t help them either.

    What’s happening inside the religion lately is grim:..halls being sold; people asked to drive further...All these needy ‘spiritual’ types who criticized me will have to go ask brothers with businesses for a job. They better act fast before the next bethel downsizing because they’ll have competition.

    All in all, I’m glad I got out of there!

  • JoenB75
    JoenB75

    A lot of tragic stories. You got a bad experience but thankfully got out in time. The spiritual types have no savings but never dreamed that the armageddon could prolong so long. I remember a story from my mom about how a very spiritual sister told her to stop murmuring about the elders, she should think of her eternal life now the end was so near. For decades this spiritual sister had expected the end to be so soon that there was no time to think or question.

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