When ever I travel to different locations around the world, or just down the highway. I have to bring my own pillow. It is just the right size, just the right shape and I even like the smell. So if I try to sleep on another pillow, I end up spending a good chunk of the night tossing and turning, as I miss my real pillow. It seems so often in life, that the simple changes are often the ones that make it hardest on us to move on. I can go out this weekend and buy a new car, and I will sleep fine. I can go purchase a stereo system for the living room and again, I will sleep without missing a beat. Yet if you take away my pillow and make me take a new one, I will miss my sleep and be a grouch the next day.
Perhaps it is just that I am a man, or maybe it is that I am human, but I like what I know and feel comfortable with it at times when I am tired. I do not want to have to worry about changing something like a pillow, when all I want is to sleep after a long day. Comfort and being able to rest is important to me, and when I think about it, I think it is important to others as well.
My mother and my sister, are both Witnesses. I often sit and speak with them and they mention changes and they mention problems. Yet in all of what they say, they still seem comfortable with what they feel and at ease with what seems to work for them at this point in life. I admit, it frustrates me and it makes me want to spend time telling them all the things they do not know. Yet in the end, it is their comfort and it is the place they enjoy.
So when I see these moments and I get these frustrations, I tend now in this life, to think of the comfort of my pillow. It is fluffy and it is soft, but it is something I enjoy and feel relaxed with. I would bet that some where on this planet is a pillow I would enjoy more and there is no doubt, a pillows that would make me a happier and a more rested sleeper for the next day. Yet for now, this pillow just feels good and if I feel that way. I have to realize, that others do to.
Basically, as much as you might go through this life wanting to change people and expose the religion for what you know it is. You can never overestimate the value of comfort that the Witness religion gives to those still in and to suggest that they change, may make perfect sense to you. Yet to them, it is like taking away the one thing that gives their mind rest and their days hope. Unless you have a full proof religion or philosophy with no holes or problems, you might be better off fluffing their pillow and avoid taking it away to only replace it with a cold rock.
My thought
Dragon
I like my pillow
by kenpodragon 18 Replies latest jw friends
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kenpodragon
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Sara Annie
Deeper point of your post totally aside, I have to weigh in on the "Love my pillow" side too.
My favorite pillow was recently destroyed by my husband in a housecleaning fit (he put in the washer and it didn't survive it's final spin cycle). I bought two new pillows and they're still not fully broken in. I haven't slept well in two weeks!
Sara of the "High Maintenance and Knows It" class.
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Funchback
I've been searching for the perfect pillow for 20 years.
Still ain't found it.
Brian of the "PAIN in the Neck (NOT Pain in the NECK)" class
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Vivamus
I love my pillow too , on trips by car, I always bring it. I think I'll start bringing it on trips by plane as well...
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Brummie
Hey Dragon! Loooong time since I saw you post, welcome back, last time you were here you were about to give birth (well your wife was), how is everything?
As regards to your post, my wifes pillow is comfortable so I usually snatch that, its the same pillow as mine but still feels better...
As regards fluffing the JW pillow up, I dont think many are comfortable with it anyway, they think there is no other option and tend to go around saying "he that endures to the end with this pillow is the one that will be saved" lol, its all about endurance for them. Their comfort is like the comfort of someone living in an asbestos house, they have a roof but everything connected to it unhealthy, some one needs to tell them that they do have a choice to move out, if they choose not to then so be it.
Good to see you back
Brummie
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onacruse
kenpo, glad to see you back! I've always enjoyed your posts, even though I've seldom posted back to you.
My mother and my sister, are both Witnesses. I often sit and speak with them and they mention changes and they mention problems. Yet in all of what they say, they still seem comfortable with what they feel and at ease with what seems to work for them at this point in life. I admit, it frustrates me and it makes me want to spend time telling them all the things they do not know. Yet in the end, it is their comfort and it is the place they enjoy.
That is one of the most touching observations I've seen on this board in a long, long time. It makes my heart melt. imho, well worth all of us here to think about.
Craig
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Dansk
IS THERE A PSYCHIATRIST IN THE HOUSE?
Dansk - who finds it impossible to sleep well anywhere!
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Shutterbug
Basically, as much as you might go through this life wanting to change people and expose the religion for what you know it is. You can never overestimate the value of comfort that the Witness religion gives to those still in and to suggest that they change, may make perfect sense to you. Yet to them, it is like taking away the one thing that gives their mind rest and their days hope
We recently moved back to the place where we lived some 30 years ago and had many witness friends in the area. Well, so far, four sisters have visited us and two more have called, four of them over sixty and two over fifty. That's when it hit me, it would not help them, or me, to destroy, or even question their faith, so I haven't done so yet. However, if the elders should make a "sheparding call" that will be another matter, regardless of their age. I knew most of these local guys when we were kids, so this may not be a fun time, for them. Will keep you informed. Bug
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Scully
Nice to see you again kenpodragon!
My mother and my sister, are both Witnesses. I often sit and speak with them and they mention changes and they mention problems. Yet in all of what they say, they still seem comfortable with what they feel and at ease with what seems to work for them at this point in life. I admit, it frustrates me and it makes me want to spend time telling them all the things they do not know. Yet in the end, it is their comfort and it is the place they enjoy.
So when I see these moments and I get these frustrations, I tend now in this life, to think of the comfort of my pillow. It is fluffy and it is soft, but it is something I enjoy and feel relaxed with. I would bet that some where on this planet is a pillow I would enjoy more and there is no doubt, a pillows that would make me a happier and a more rested sleeper for the next day. Yet for now, this pillow just feels good and if I feel that way. I have to realize, that others do to.I agree with the concept you've brought to this thread... it's an excellent reminder to all of us who have family and friends still inside the organization, that perhaps they find a measure of comfort and peace with the belief system that the WTS offers them. After 30+ years of being JWs, and having no other social structure outside the JWs, I really can't expect my parents to leave at this point of their lives, because I'd never be able to replace the social experience they have with their JW friends.
The kicker in this illustration, however, is that more often than not, JWs will tell you that your pillow is a piece of crap, that theirs is SOOOOOO much better and then they'll proceed to hold their pillow over your face - DF/DA/shunning/marking - in order to prove to you that it is sooooooo much better. You get asphyxiated in the process.
It's too bad they can't be as understanding of our needs for comfort and being able to sleep with a clear conscience as we would like to be toward them.
Love, Scully
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SixofNine
Methinks you've done just that.You can never overestimate the value of comfort that the Witness religion gives to those still in