My "anointed" roommate told me a good one today.
As we were discussing psychotropic medications, she brought up a friend of hers who was recently forced off of "benzodiazepine" (there is no one drug by this name; rather, it is a specific classification of drug). She claimed that many people are being forced off of the medication(s) due to "concerns over side effects," and that her friend is suffering from withdrawal on top of whatever symptoms the drug was previously helping to control (she didn't elaborate and I didn't feel comfortable asking, sorry).
My roommate then went on record to say (I'm paraphrasing here) "This is why Armageddon has to happen very soon, because Satan is using this system to make all these people suffer psychologically to drive them into the streets and go crazy. It's going to be complete chaos!"
So...what have YOU been told is a sign that Armageddon is practically upon us?