This weekend, while Katie and I were at the beach, we both spent a little time reading CoC (no, it wasn't a study LOL ). I came across a comment of Ray about himself that meant a lot to me (4th ed., p. 52):
...I can honestly say that I did not favor the disfellowshipping decision made by the [Governing] Body. But that is all that I can say. For when the vote came I conformed to the majority decision. I felt dismayed when the Body assigned me to prepare mateiral in support of the decision, yet I accepted the assignment and wrote it as was desired by the Body...My belief in the organization as God's only agency on earth caused me to do what I did at that time without particularly great qualms of conscience.
This topic has been discussed in this forum many times before. Perhaps, though, it's a good reminder that our conformity to the WTS was driven by some subtle, and many not-so-subtle, social and psychological pressures that have nothing to do with how smart we are. We could be Einsteins all, and still have ended up fully supporting that organization.
And, perhaps, another "moral of the story": to the extent that we can look back and be honest with ourselves about why we did what we did, then at least to that extent we can lay down that part of our burden and move on with our healing.
Craig