Crazy bible logic

by OverlappingGeneralizations 20 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

• 

  OverlappingGeneralizations

  I was thinking the other day (I know, I know, bad dub, no thinking allowed!)... Did you ever notice the screwy logic that we are led to believe is the truth? Like Ezekiel 33:8:

  -"When I say to someone wicked, ‘Wicked one, you will surely die!’ but you do not speak out to warn the wicked one to change his course, he will die as a wicked man because of his own error, but I will ask his blood back from you"

  This was always beat into my head that if I didn't preach, all the dead people would be blamed on me. I didn't kill them, God did. Yet he, of infallible justice, blames imperfect ol' me? I get to be God's scapegoat? (Wait a minute, is that a privilege? Usually crappy jobs in the bOrg are considered privileges...)

  Anyhow, so next time I feel like killing somebody, all I have to do is tell a 3rd party- "I am going to kill a random person at a random time with a totally random method". If they don't stop me, it'll be the 3rd party's fault. I'm off the hook. I'm imitating God.

  Lets hear all those crazy bible logic stories!
• 

  _Morpheus

  Really good point. I also always figured that if it was soooooooo goddamn important that somebody be warned... Shouldnt GOD do it himself....? I mean, if its soooooooo bad that he has to kill someone and its sooooo bad that if i dont warn them i have to die.... Why dosent god warn them himself? Why send me? Its complete bullhockey and a total shifting of responsibility.

  Its also good cause to take the judeo/christian narrative for the manipulative nonsense it is
• 

  Finkelstein

  Wasn't stated in the bible somewhere that Jesus cursed a fig tree because it didn't bear fruit or figs as it were ?
  

  Bible logic ....... that's a oxymoron in itself.
  
• 

  Crazyguy

  Isaiah 45:7 God creates evil, but God is so loving.
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  Watchtower-Free

  
  
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  Island Man

  "When I say to someone wicked, ‘Wicked one, you will surely die!’ but you do not speak out to warn the wicked one to change his course, he will die as a wicked man because of his own error, but I will ask his blood back from you"

  What is the principle upon which the one who failed to warn the wicked one, is held responsible for his death? Is it not the principle of not acting to help someone whose wellbeing is in danger? So this bible passage shows us that is immoral to do nothing to help someone who is in danger.

  However, in the bible teach book, Watchtower argues that God is innocent of blame for allowing evil things to happen. They say there is a big difference between causing harm and allowing it to happen. Such reasoning is atrocious and contradicts the fundamental principle underpinning the scripture you quoted from Ezekiel.

  A person who allows someone to suffer harm without doing anything to help them while having the power to help them is acting immorally. Therefore when the God of the bible sits by and allows all manner of atrocities to befall people when he has the power to stop it - he too is acting immorally. It is only logical. But theists can't admit this inconsistency.
• 

  Divergent

  Romans 14: 1 - 23 makes no sense!

  
  

  Let us analyse this passage. My comments are in yellow:

  
  

  14 Welcome the man having weaknesses in his faith, but do not pass judgment on differing opinions. One man has faith to eat everything, but the man who is weak eats only vegetables. 3 Let the one eating not look down on the one not eating, and let the one not eating not judge the one eating, for God has welcomed him. 4 Who are you to judge the servant of another? To his own master he stands or falls. Indeed, he will be made to stand, for Jehovah can make him stand. 5 One man judges one day as above another; another judges one day the same as all others; let each one be fully convinced in his own mind. 6 The one who observes the day observes it to Jehovah. Also, the one who eats, eats to Jehovah, for he gives thanks to God; and the one who does not eat does not eat to Jehovah, and yet gives thanks to God. 7 Not one of us, in fact, lives with regard to himself only, and no one dies with regard to himself only. 8 For if we live, we live to Jehovah, and if we die, we die to Jehovah. So both if we live and if we die, we belong to Jehovah. 9 For to this end Christ died and came to life again, so that he might be Lord over both the dead and the living. 10 But why do you judge your brother? Or why do you also look down on your brother? For we will all stand before the judgment seat of God. 11 For it is written: “‘As surely as I live,’ says Jehovah,‘to me every knee will bend, and every tongue will make open acknowledgment to God.’” 12 So, then, each of us will render an account for himself to God. 13 Therefore, let us not judge one another any longer

  Yes, we should not judge one another. 100% agreed

  13 but, rather, be determined not to put a stumbling block or an obstacle before a brother. 14 I know and am convinced in the Lord Jesus that nothing is unclean in itself; only where a man considers something to be unclean, to him it is unclean. 15 For if your brother is being offended because of food, you are no longer walking according to love. Do not by your food ruin that one for whom Christ died. 16 Therefore, do not let the good you do be spoken of as bad. 17 For the Kingdom of God does not mean eating and drinking, but means righteousness and peace and joy with holy spirit. 18 For whoever slaves for Christ in this way is acceptable to God and has approval with men.19 So, then, let us pursue the things making for peace and the things that build one another up. 20 Stop tearing down the work of God just for the sake of food. True, all things are clean, but it is detrimental for a man to eat when it will cause stumbling. 21 It is best not to eat meat or drink wine or do anything over which your brother stumbles. 22 The faith that you have, keep it to yourself before God. Happy is the man who does not judge himself by what he approves. 23 But if he has doubts, he is already condemned if he eats, because he does not eat based on faith. Indeed, everything that is not based on faith is sin.

  Wait... you said earlier that no one should judge, but now you talk about not stumbling your brother??? Should not the brother be the one not judging instead???

  
  

  Same goes with 1 Corinthians 10: 23 - 31 which also makes no sense!

  
  

  1 Corinthians 10: 23 - All things are lawful, but not all things are advantageous. All things are lawful, but not all things build up.
  

  Things that are lawful may not be advantageous or build up. So I can do things according to God's law and still be wrong???

  24 Let each one keep seeking, not his own advantage, but that of the other person.

  So we should prioritize the other person first. Wait... but shouldn't the other person be giving us prority likewise???
  

  25 Eat whatever is sold in a meat market, making no inquiry because of your conscience, 26 for “to Jehovah belong the earth and everything in it.” 27 If an unbeliever invites you and you want to go, eat whatever is set before you, making no inquiry on account of your conscience.

  Yay! So I can eat anything I want according to my own conscience!

  28 But if anyone says to you, “This is something offered in sacrifice,” do not eat because of the one who told you and because of conscience.

  WTF! You just said earlier that it's MY conscience whether to eat or not!!!

  29 I do not mean your own conscience, but that of the other person. For why should my freedom be judged by another person’s conscience? 30 If I am partaking with thanks, why am I to be spoken of abusively over that for which I give thanks?

  Exactly. Why should my freedom be judged by another person's conscience? Why should I be spoken of abusively when it's my conscience? And what do you mean that you do not mean my own conscience but that of the other person when you specifically mentioned that it's MY personal conscience in verses 25 - 27???

  31 Therefore, whether you are eating or drinking or doing anything else, do all things for God’s glory. 32 Keep from becoming causes for stumbling to Jews as well as Greeks and to the congregation of God

  Doing all things to God's glory means following his law (eg. not eating blood). Telling us not to stumble others in other matters of food is irrelevant as whatever we do is according to our own conscience as stated in verses 25 - 27!!!

  
  

  Finally, we come to Colossians 2: 16 -

  Therefore, do not let anyone judge you about what you eat and drink or about the observance of a festival or of the new moon or of a sabbath.

  So we should not let anyone judge again. Great! What the hell was that stumbling part all about then???

  
  
• 

  Village Idiot

  Here's a collection of Bible contradictions and evil obscenities: http://www.scribd.com/doc/95804194/A-Most-Evil-and-Stupid-Book-The-Bible-s-Moral-Depravity-Contradictions-and-Absurdities

  The first one mentioned - my favorite - are the two different lists of the ten commandments where the second claims to be like just like the first but is actually very different with commandments like: “Do not cook a young goat in its mother’s milk.”
• 

  James Mixon

  OG: "all the dead people would be blamed on me". No problem, do like Eaekiel and

  go and preach at your local graveyard. Ezekiel 37:4 "Prophesy to those bones and

  say to them, dead people hear the word of the Lord". You may be taken away in

  a white truck and put away somewhere, but you may save your soul.

  The question, is logic more important than God's word.
• 

  Divergent

  And not to forget Samson...
  

  Judges 15:

  4 So Samson went and caught 300 foxes. Then he took torches, turned the foxes tail to tail, and put one torch between each pair of tails. 5 Then he set fire to the torches and sent the foxes out into the fields of standing grain of the Phi·lisʹtines. He set on fire everything from sheaf to standing grain, as well as the vineyards and the olive groves.

  300 burning foxes. Yeah right!

  15 He now found a fresh jawbone of a male donkey; he reached out and grabbed it and struck down 1,000 men with it. 16 Then Samson said:

  “With the jawbone of a donkey—one heap, two heaps!

  With the jawbone of a donkey I struck down 1,000 men.”

  So we are expected to believe that Samson killed 1,000 men with the jawbone of a donkey??? Bear in mind that Samson could only kill at close range. These men had no weapons such as bows & arrows which they could use against Samson at a distance???