first timer...feelin like crap (page 2)

WildHorses

Welcome to the forum boolean,

I think I understand what you mean about lying in order to be df'd. Look at it this way. At least the gossip they will be spreading around is something you made up. You now have soemthing to sit back and laugh about. After all, they think it was God spirit that made you come forward and spill your guts and that they were doing a service by df'ing you. Proves what they say about being "Gods true religion" is pure crap. If it were really Gods true org, they would have known you were lying.

You know what I find funny. They will believe you when you lie but not when you are telling the truth.

Shari

Ghost of Esmeralda

Hey there boolean, welcome to the never-ending circus that is the life of an exJW with relatives still in the Borg! I hope you find some comfort here among those in similiar circumstances.

Wish I had some wonderfully healing advice to offer. All I can do is recommend a couple books, and websites. Read as much as you can at Freeminds and Silentlambs if you ever waver wondering whether the decision to leave was right.

Read this board often to know that you're not alone and so many of us have lost everything by leaving, except the most important thing, ourselves.

Sometimes, you will feel like you've lost yourself, too. But you have to give it time. You'll find you're still in there, and that you like yourself a lot better for having had the sense to finally say enough, and get out.

For reading, I recommend The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz (changed forever the way I look at my fellow humans) Life Strategies by Dr. Phil McGraw. I've just started reading a book by Byron Katie called "Loving what it is" and it looks good but I can't give it a full review yet cause I haven't gotten that far into it, but it was recommended to me by a venerable poster here :)

Wish you the best of luck. Hope this makes sense as the caffeine hasn't kicked in yet this morning.

Welcome to the real world...enjoy your stay! :)

hugs

essie

www.ghostwriter.homestead.com

Yerusalyim

Boo,

Welcome to the Board. Having never been JW myself I don't have to deal with the whole DF/Shunning issue, but I'm sorry about missing your family. Don't worry about your little lie to the Elders, the Society has lied for years. If it would help, write a letter to your parents and the Elders (and any friends still in) and tell them the truth, that you lied just to get out because you don't believe and don't WANT to believe.

Scooby

Hey B-

You know maybe getting DF'd is a blessing. I have heard some say that clean intense break gave them the needed conviction to seek fully elsewhere. If you had da'd yourself you might feel that you just walked away. Now maybe DF'd feels to you to be more final and intense? The farther you can get away the better. Just a thought.

Welcome and hope you enjoy.

Country_Woman

Hello Boolean,

Actially, you have seen the "light" yet.

Now you are free to make up your own mind.

Still it will be difficult with family members who are JW's.

Stay around, regards,

Country Woman

breal

Hi Boolean,

Sorry you are having a rough time of it...but like most things this too shall pass or at least change! I was DF's many years ago and like others mentioned it involves a ton of emotions and to me phases... anger, loneliness, regret, joy, excitement, happiness, contentment...

Enjoy this new found freedom and time to really discover yourself. Go easy on yourself and try to take it in baby steps. I would spend the time you have doing things you really enjoy. Hopefully you have some non JW friends, coworkers etc that you can be around if not this is a great place to come to.

Cheers,

BReal

Francois

If it were God's true religion they would be following Jesus' only two commands for us; they would be loving god with a whole soul and they would be loving their neighbors as they love themselves.

Hell's bells, they don't even love their neighbor in the seat next to them, much less in the house next to them. If they've got God's true religion, I'm the Virgin Mary.

You done good.

francois

shera

Hi and welcome Boolean

I can't 100% relate to loosing family because I was the only one in and I DA myself many yrs ago.

I think we all go threw the same emountions of leaving the JW's and learning the truth about the (trooooof")

Take care and talk away.

Heather

Brummie

boolean welcome aboard! I'm sorry for you, I remember the time I was going through the same thing, I wouldnt wish it on my worst enemy, I hope you find a lot of support here, be patient with yourself, there are brighter days ahead. Its just unfortunate that we have to go through these emotional rollercoasters in order to find our own surpressed emotions and bring them all to the surface again.

Thinking of you matey

Brummie

Jayson

Hey B-

I'm sorry you hurt. When my wife went through this it tore at my heart. I will never understand hurting someone you love in the name of that love. It's pathological if you asked me. And that is part of my understanding now, they are sick. (her jw family.)

There are many people here to help you if you need them. If you ask for support you will get it. Books are a source that are invaluable as are professional people like Docs and Shrinks. They can make your pain much lighter and easier to carry. You deserve to be loved unconditionaly. If friends or even family can not or will not do that then they are neither.

No doubt you will see petty bickering here from time to time. (it's irrelevent) However, I believe that there are few who would not drop whatever is going on to help you if they can. There is a deep bond that many if not all people here have. We have suffered scares from the Watchtower Society and survived.

first timer...feelin like crap

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