DO IT, OR DIE!

Jessica Rabbit

I think maybe some of the members on this board criticise those of us who are always bringing up our childhood experiences in the JW organization because they may have only been exposed to it briefly and then got out quick. Maybe they think it was all in our heads and we should just get over it. What is so sad is that EVERY decision I ever made in my life either meant I would die at Armageddon or live forever in the New System because that was reality. It was REAL. Even when I finally did go out and party and do some things I'm not proud of, I knew I was choosing to DIE at Armageddon. I thought, "well I am gonna live it up while I can and die happy". I guess I never believed I was created to have free will. I believed that God was the guy the society told me he was. I never thought he would love me just for being me. It was do all this stuff, or die. I grew up believing that being an individual and doing what brought pleasure in MY life was pointless. If I didn't follow all the rules according to the society of how a servant of God should be then it wouldn't matter what I wanted to pursue in my life, I would be destroyed anyway. I never had the drive to pursue a career or hobby because my destiny was already fixed. Now that is the epitome of mind control. There is so much to experience on this earth. I want to feel the rush and excitement of LIVING!

(It's so nice getting to vent. Even if no one else replies, I feel better!)

SheilaM

Jessica Rabbit: I understand and so does many, many people here. The dubs drain you. I mean really why bother ya know by how they teach. If you read some of mine and THunders back posts we told how it made us feel.

Jessica Rabbit

Thank you Sheila. I have more compassion and understanding people on this forum than I ever did back then. It just proves that all those feelings weren't just in MY head.

nicolaou

Your head, mine and hundreds of thousands of others Jess'.

I'm glad you felt better after posting that 'cause I sure felt better after reading it. Thanks.

Nic'

TheSilence

if it helps, i know exactly where youre coming from ;)

jackie

nilfun

One of my favorite quotes:

"Part of getting over it is knowing that you will never get over it."
-unknown

If someone has gotten over it, well, good for them. How nice to be able to work out your past in your own way, in your own good time, and then turn around and tell other people to get over it without even knowing them personally, or knowing at what stage of healing they are or how much they have gone through with JWs (or anything else for that matter).

Hamas

We may leave the watchtower, but the watchtower may never leave us.

I will always remember my experiences in the Watchtower ; never be ashamed to speak of them.

http://www.escapethewatchtower.com/my_testimony.html

sandy

I never had the drive to pursue a career or hobby because my destiny was already fixed.

Jessica Rabbit,
This is so true. Although I am an adult now and I must take responsibility for my own actions; I can and do put blame on the Org. for discouraging me from being successful.
I never thought about going to college because I thought it would mean I was not spiritual. I planned to pioneer after high school, which pleased everyone.
My parents did not encourage college at all either. Instead they said: "you don't need college just find a job after high school. This system isn't going to last much longer".
I could have a degree in my hand right now. Instead here I am at 27 years old barely realizing how small minded and uneducated I am.

Thunder Rider

Small minded and uneducated???? Shame on you. Sandy its never too late to go back to school, Sheila is 39 and is getting a fine arts degree. I'm 39 and have discovered the joy and fulfilment of writing novels. You can accomplish anything you want, but you gott quit berating yourself with comments like that.

Brass rings out there a plenty! Grab one for yourself!

Thunder

avishai

Instead here I am at 27 years old barely realizing how small minded and uneducated I am. Yup, I know what ya mean, I mean your usually 17-18 before you even start to realize It's b.s. The guidance counselors have usually

crossed you off by then.

DO IT, OR DIE!

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