Did The Witnesses Mess Up Your Sex Life?

by minimus 23 Replies latest jw friends

  • Phizzy
    Phizzy

    Growing up in any milieu that says Sex is a Sin, at least generally, apart form in certain circumstances is bound ot affect your Sex life, and your whole life in various ways.

    Had I exercised more sexual freedom as a teenager, because of what Society was at the time I would probably have ended up married to someone else than my wife of over 50 years anyway. Because i would have been shagging one of my previous girlfriends regularly, i would have felt obliged to marry one of them. Extricating yourself from a marriage is always painful.

    So, although I wish I had not had the constraints of being a JW , or of Society in general at the time, my life may have been very different because of the " freedom".

    But for JW kids today, when Society in general has become much more adult and sensible about Sex, the restrictions imposed by the Org cause too many to rush in to inappropriate marriages, which end up in heartache and pain, the kind that often goes on for the rest of the life of the people involved, even kids who have been born to the folks who never really should have married.

    The Org causes unnecessary suffering once again by a 19th Century view of Sex.

  • minimus
    minimus

    Agreed. Kids with normal hormones are either forced to Pioneer or get married. Stay busy preaching to keep your mind off of sex or get married. Dating is not a game!

  • Vidiot
    Vidiot
    minimus - "...Dating is not a game..."

    Agreed.

    It's actually more like school.

    Weird, no?

    Maybe not.

    I've given this a shit-ton of thought as a parent, and in the end...

    ...the way I see it, adolescence is training for adulthood.

    You learn to work a job, drive a car, interact (at least semi-)maturely with others, etc., all using training and practice*... because these are necessary skills for functioning as an adult by the time you get there.

    And I would argue that the ability to navigate an intimate relationship might qualify, too (for the record, I don't necessarily mean "sexual" when I say "intimate").

    Therefore, it stands to reason that learning how to navigate that type of relationship via training and practice - i.e. dating - could be appropriate during that time, too.

    I could be wrong about that, but I guarantee you this...

    ...I would have been a way more well-rounded twentysomething if I hadn't followed the WT rules and dated the nice-looking female high school classmates who liked me.

    Then again, if I had broken said rules, I may not have ended up married to the wife I have and become the father of the very kids whose "relationship training" I've given a shit-ton of thought about, so...

    ...what the fuck do I know?


    *the regular definition of the word, not the one the WTS likes to use Vidiot

  • Vidiot
    Vidiot

    All this is kind of academic, though.

    The actual historical reasons that the sexual uptightness of religious conservatives with European ancestry (the WTS's ideological forebears) got so entrenched are because...

    a) ...constant indiscriminate boning naturally created a constant influx of illegitimate children, which, in turn, created constant lineage- and inheritance-related headaches, and...

    b) ...syphilis had actually become a major problem (think the AIDS pandemic in the 80s, but lasting centuries because Medieval medicine).

    Don't believe me? Look it up.

    Entire fashion trends were designed around concealing signs of past or present infection.

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