8 years. The final kick was the blatant hypocrisy. As a whole dubs from the local level all the way to New York and dish whats wrong with everthing in this world{because its all Satanic}, but can take it when they make mistakes. What a terrible pressure they put themselves under and everyone who believes it. By the way the year 1975 came up before I became a Dub. I was tod the society never directly said the world would end then, that it was over-zealous publishers that drew the wrong conclusion. I ask what conclusion were they suppose to arrive at and who was providing that direction?
How Long Were You "In Transition" Before You Left The Organization?
by minimus 51 Replies latest jw friends
-
-
Emma
Now that I've thought about it, it was probably around ten years for me. I remember realizing I couldn't "stick it out" much longer if armagedon didn't come. Then my (now ex) husband got sick, I had to go to work and I made a Big Deal to my employer about needing all the meeting times off. The store arranged most of the schedule around my needs; then the co asked our family to move to a nearby cong that "needed help." My husband a ms, of course said yes. I told everyone I was not going back to my employer and ask to turn the schedule upside down again. The elders, etc, didn't seem concerned about me, didn't seem to care I was now missing most meetings. It was just a matter of time after that, though it took me about another three years.
-
Nosferatu
Vanant, I can relate. I was working on delaying baptism for the longest time. One piece of advice: don't give in. If you remain unbaptized, you have the freedom of talking to JWs and xJWs without being shunned by anyone. I can also relate to your current situation, but here's my story in a nutshell:
1982-1983: My mother begins studying with the JWs after someone came to her door. I was forced to sit in on the studies when I was 5 years old.
1983-1987: I adopt the life of a JW at school even though I wasn't going regularily to the meetings because of my worldly father. Even though I had a love for Jehovah and didn't want to die at armageddon, I didn't see the point in going to meetings 3 times a week or going out on field service.
1987: My father gets picked up for drunk driving and quits his job. He lies in bed depressed while my mother reads Watchtower magazines to him.
1989-1990: My father attends his first JW meeting and begins studying the bible. Me & him end up studying with the same elder.
1990-1992: I work on accepting the fact that this is the one true religion. I begin progressing in the truth.
1993: I begin struggling with the teachings of the organization. I let it be known that I was reading some older publications and I was discouraged from doing so. I also get pushed into becoming an unbaptized publisher and joining the Theocratic Ministry School. Many in the congregation ask "When are you getting baptized?" My answer is "When I'm ready".
1994-1995: My faith in the organization begins to drop dramatically. I switch schools and begin leading a double life. Nobody in my new school knew that I was a JW. My school life became much easier but my home life didn't. I started entering depression and I swore that I would be out of the organization after I turned 18
1996: I turn 18, but I continued to go to meetings for months. During this time I started rebelling against the organization and the new brother studying with me. My father quit going to meetings after the District Convention and I gave my last talk in the TMS which also turned out to me my last meeting in late 1996. Elders meet with me to discuss my condition and I let them know I do not wish to continue.
1997-1999: What if they're right?
2000(?): I attend a funeral at the KH with my fiance. This is when my eyes were really opened. Good-hearted People vs Theocratic Diehards is as clear as Black vs White.
2001: Fiance leaves me and I begin a new path with self-improvement.
2002: Self-improvement site provides a link to freeminds.org on how crazy JWs are. My eyes become completely opened after reading the site thoroughly.
2003: I'm a Happy Apostate.
So to answer the question, it took 3 years to physically get out, mainly because of my living situation and my age. It took 9 years to mentally get out. If I had come across the exJW sites earlier or thought to look for them, the 9 years could have been less.
-
minimus
Interesting post, Nos. What made you just start reading the older publications????.........You have called yourself a JW but in reality, you were never baptized. You were raised as a Witness but never baptized. Maybe that's the situation of the Williams sisters.
-
Nosferatu
What made you just start reading the older publications????
I think it was the rarity of them. The elder I studied with had an incredible "library". He had a copy of the very first WT, that 3 inch bible, every volume of SS. You name it, he had it. I could never understand the reason for keeping all the old literature if you weren't allowed to read it. I was told that the society had made changes since those publications, and that I should read them with caution. It would also be in my best interest to read the latest publications from the society to keep up to date with the world conditions.
You have called yourself a JW but in reality, you were never baptized.
That may be true, but I continually "took a stand for Jehovah" as if I was going to eventually progress toward baptism. I also suffered a lot of the same emotional and physical abuse that many baptized ones suffered. Therefore, I consider myself an Ex-JW even though I was never baptized.
All of will be in my autobiography which will be available for free download in the near future (once I finish it).
-
Guest 77
I've had a few blowouts along the way, but the final blowout is when the Elder began to think for me. He knew exactly what was on my mind and heart. I just love it when people can read my heart and mind, just love it!
Guest 77
-
minimus
Guest, didn't you know that all elders have superpowers?
-
liquidsky
7 long years.
-
Vanant
Nosferatu, thanks for the advice. Don't worry, I have zero intention of getting baptized . . . I know that'll put me into an even deeper hole than the one I'm in now. The possibility of getting officially DF'd/DA'd is too risky, and makes fading way harder . . . well, I wish for the best for both of us! And I look forward to reading your autobiography when you finish writing it.
-
micheal
For me it was about 6 months. Just sitting there at the district conv. very disturbed with what I was hearing, it grew and grew with each meeting I went to before I said I had to get out of there or else I would kill myself.