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I went to work today
by larrynbabies 15 Replies latest jw experiences
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bikerchic
(((((((((larrynbabies)))))))))
*Wiping tears from my face, trying not to sob*
I can't imagine how you must ache for Megan, it made me so sad for you to read this. I'm at a loss for what to say except keep on taking baby steps, be kind to yourself and hold on to all the good thoughts and memories you have of Megan. Maybe make a journal to keep them in will help. I wish you the very best and hope time does heal for you and your babies.
Hugs!
Kate
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avengers
You have my deepest and sincerest condolences.
I admire your courage and may it be an example for us all.Andy.
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outnfree
(((((((larrynbabies))))))))),
I know going out that door to work was a HUGE step for you! I wish you more courage and less intense grief as the days go on.
I think bikerchic's idea of a journal is a wonderful one. You might write it with the intention of one day sharing it with the babies. It is an awesome way to keep their mother alive for them. I know my mother recently found some of my dad's writings and it was very healing and very heartwarming and interesting to learn how he thought about we kids and his life, etc.
My instinct was also that the distance of Megan from you in your dreams is a sign that it's okay for you to move on. Also, I think perhaps your Dad's closeness and frequent appearances may be telling you two things: 1/Megan is okay, and 2/While you will always mourn her, Dad is here to help you be a man and "the dad" to your kids. I like to think that, anyway.
Carrying on is difficult, but you're up to the task. Allow yourself the bad days, but if you strive to put the happiness in your life and your babies' lives that Megan felt was so important, that will honor her memory, too.
outnfree
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zeena1998
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You have my deepest condolences. The pain you're going through is unimaginable and words are never enough.
Be proud of yourself for having the courage to get up each day and care for your precious babies...there are many who wouldn't. They are the legacy of yours and Megan's love. Be proud that you've taken the step in rebuilding your life. One never thinks that something like this will happen to them, but you are showing us how grace and courage can get one through.
Thank you for sharing your story. It is moving beyond words.
Andie
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Billygoat
(((((((((Larry)))))))))))
Good for you for going to work! The more "routine" you make for yourself, the better! I know this probably sounds terrible, but sometimes I imagine my life without Neil. Not because I want it that way, but because I want to think about how my life would be without him. It makes our moments together that much sweeter when I realize that any minute, anything could change that blessing. Ever read "Tuesdays with Morrie"? Made me look at life in a different way every since I finished that book!
Andi