JW funeral! Help!

by smurfette 21 Replies latest jw friends

  • smurfette
    smurfette
    "playing the friendly native guide"

    I needed a laugh that is too true! As for getting any conversation with my uncles & cousins every time I attempt to let them know whats going on regarding my mom & jw relatives snide assides at me in JW code and why they aren't talking to me around the other JW's my mom appears and stops the conversation. I also don't want to bring this up while they are grieving. As for my brother he has a highly explosive temper which I'm not going to help him light in any way. He's still in somewhat good standing with the JW's despite his green dreadlocks and forthright hate of their beliefs because they think he's mentally ill.(He's not just a free thinker)

    Again thanks for being there-

    Margy

  • TresHappy
    TresHappy

    Sorry for the death of your grandmother. My grandmother died in May at age 87. I have spoken of the frustrations of my non JW grandmother having a JW funeral in previous threads. I miss my grandmother very much. Listening and sitting thru my grandmother's JW funeral was sort of like experiencing Chinese water torture except the water torture was much more enjoyable.

    Remember the good times with your grandmother. You will have wonderful eternal memories of her and remember her unconditional love. I did, that's the only thing that got me through the grief and bereavement. I know she wouldn't me to exhaust myself in grief and it's gets easier through the passage of time. I still feel her love and she's in my heart forever.

    I miss you Mima!

  • smurfette
    smurfette

    What's this about non JW's having JW funerals???!!!! That is horrible guys! I am so sorry. I've never heard of anything like that & I was in & around JW's for 13 years.

    That is just wrong!

  • talesin
    talesin

    smurfette

    I assume it was my post you were asking about.

    My grandfather studied for a couple months back in the 40's, that was it. He never partook of the jw (ie, never went to kh, door-to-door). Although he always said he felt they were probably right. I always figured he just wanted his personal freedom to drink, smoke, etc. When he died, the family (90% jw) had a jw funeral for him. I can't tell you about the talk cause i didn't attend.

    and yes, it is wrong, he had no say in the matter.

  • JT
    JT

    my advice simple- if you are going to this furneral - more than likely you will get dogged and the shaft

    that being the case, talk to your non-jw relatives , LET THEM KNOW HOW THE JW PART OF THE FAMILY WILL TREAT YOU AND WHY - it is very important that jw be exposed for the goofy dogmas they live by- let the nonjw family know - this way when they see it they can address it'

    case in point, one person i told this to did the following-

    let the nonjw family know about the shunning, then they stuck with the nonjw family as they approached the jw and spoke - of course they could not speak to the Dfed person or it was one of those WEAK hello-

    in fact the non jw family asked the jw - CAN'T YOU SPEAK TO HIM- And of course the jw must respond NO- AND THE NONJW in turn could be the one to go off--

    "here we are at grandpa furneral and you can't even speak, o my god, what kind of religion is this , even the Good samaritan helped out the man beside the road"

    I REPEAT DO NOT HIDE THE SHUNNING FROM THE NONJW FAMILY

    let them see it in ACTION FOR THEMSELVES they will not beleive how cold jw can be when they see it for themselves

  • TresHappy
    TresHappy

    Smurfette,

    Perhaps I need to clarify.. My grandmother spent the last 2 years of her life in the care of her JW daughter and JW elder son-in-law (my parents.) My grandmother had a brother who became a JW and she had respect for them because her brother was a real creep before then and he turned his life around. So she had respect for the JW's in that sense. She asked her son-in-law to perform the eulogy. It was held in the chapel of the funeral home. But that dumb JW song "Life w/o end at last" was played at the beginning and end. Practically the whole time was spent defending the JW theology and going back and forth from Scripture to Scripture. My parents did a wonderful job caring for her and I know grandmother is at peace and not having to fight to breathe anymore. But that rambling bunch of words...I had a cousin tell me she thought she'd been abducted by aliens!

  • oldcrowwoman
    oldcrowwoman

    Smurfette

    My condolences goes out to you in these times of the loss of your Grandmother. She sounds special to you.

    I support you in taking care of yourself surounding this unhealthy energy. I am glad their are non-jws to get support from during this time.

    I am also from Minnesota.

    Interesting that one post here sharing about Ron and Mavis Frye. I use to be in the same congregation in the middle 1970's. Small world.

    OCW

  • bikerchic
    bikerchic

    (((((smurfette))))) my condolences to you for the loss of your dear Grandmother. Whatever happens at the funeral (sorry I have no additonal advise to give you) I hope it works out for the best. Just remember you are there to pay your respects and honor your Grandmother, I know you'll do her proud.

    Kate

  • Francois
    Francois

    I suggest that each and every time any of the Oh so holy JWs give you any shit whatsoever, you respond with a little sermonette based on Mt. 7:1. And really drill it home to anyone who has the gall to say anything to you.

  • smack
    smack

    I was at a funeral about 3 months ago. It was for my nephew. He had a family only type service at the crematorium, followed by a full blown JW service at the hall. My reason to attend was to pay my respects, support my brother and immediate family and to give a good witness for all the people that had woken up and got out.

    Go to the service and be yourself! She didn't cut you off so go and spend the most important few minutes together for the last thyme!

    Steve

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