Fade question: New Cong or stay.

by Darkknight757 31 Replies latest jw experiences

  • ToesUp
    ToesUp

    "I'd rather have a buffalo take a dump in my ear than to do that job again."

    That's great!

  • Darkknight757
    Darkknight757
    Hi ToesUp yea it's a stolen quote from the angry Nintendo nerd on YouTube. He swears like a sailor but is full of silly and funny sayings. He reviews old Nintendo games, primarily the really bad ones, thus he is "angry" lol.
  • OnTheWayOut
    OnTheWayOut

    Slow down there. You just asked the question and half-an-hour later, you think you have heard enough.
    Changing congregations may be the answer, but it may not.

    Toes up: I think it depends on the hall you decide to move in. Some halls have lazy elders who could care less that you left, so they won't bother you. Some halls have Nazi Elders.
    We had lazy Elders, so for the most part they left us alone.

    There's your answer. If you are not being hounded at your current congregation, you may be able to move and just fade out quickly there. You don't know what a new set of elders will do.

    If you fade out and are then hounded too much, you can then say "Oh, we moved. We want our records forwarded." Then see if it works better at the new hall.

  • Darkknight757
    Darkknight757

    You make a good point OTWO. Currently I am being pressured and hounded at my current hall but who knows what could happen at a new one. My hope is for lazy elders but one cannot know.

    edit: So maybe miss more and more and then if the pressure gets too high then say , "we moved".

  • The Big Machine
    The Big Machine
    I moved halls in order to fade. They received my records the first week of July and I completely stopped everything right after. I have never once had an elder try to talk to me from that hall or from my old one. As far as my old hall is concerned, they think I moved away. The new hall probably doesn't even remember who I am. My meeting attendance in the new hall was sporadic at best before my records arrived and I didn't go out in service, so I didn't leave enough of a mark for anyone to remember me when the time came to disappear.
  • The Big Machine
    The Big Machine
    Plus, I made sure to pick a hall where I didn't know anyone. It was one of the few in my area where I didn't.
  • jookbeard
    jookbeard
    I'd stay where you are, the new cong could have a very young set of elders very proactive and efficient, and a lot bears on what the CO is like and have either congs got a CO visit coming up? I'd stay where you are and just start the fade ASAP.
  • OnTheWayOut
    OnTheWayOut

    Just a suggestion, but YES. You are being hounded, so see how bad it gets when you fade completely. Typically, you can ignore their calls and texts and they will give up after several weeks, sometimes sooner. Sometimes, never.

    If they don't give up, then say you moved. If you move, you could visit a few halls to see if you can get a feel for who has the lazy elders, but I don't see that as an easy task. If you do visit a new congregation, don't tell them you moved, just say you are visiting because you are contemplating a move.

    Remember that you cannot be DF'ed for being inactive. You are free to blow off talking to them.

  • OnTheWayOut
    OnTheWayOut

    I fully agree with The Big Machine's comments. Plus, if you wind up doing the move thing, get a temporary cell phone number for the new elders and let them go to voicemail. Give them a slightly wrong address.

    I would immediately cease attending so they don't even remember me. I would monitor the cell number for two or three months (maybe more) and if they never find me, I would just put them in my mirror and never go back.

  • Giordano
    Giordano

    You can also suggest at the New Hall that you have to travel frequently for business and your wife often accompanies you because of a medical condition.

    Always remember that JW's cherish honesty so if you can fake it you've got it made! (lol)

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