JW Hypocrisy Rears It's Ugly Head...As Usual

by babygirl30 23 Replies latest jw friends

  • babygirl30
    babygirl30

    So about last night...

    I am out at a local club (not restaurant, not event venue - a club) to see a rap concert. Now, I am with some friends minding my own business, and I find that I am standing right behind 3 ACTIVE JW's - one of whom used to be my best friend. This girl is as fake as they come: 1) she used to live with me and would bring non-JW guys home all the time, 2) was living with a man when she lived down south - until he dumped her, and then she decided to go back to JW's the 1st time and got reproved, and I supported her. 3) she found another boyfriend and was running the streets the 2nd time she came back East and lived with me, until she again got her heart broken and that led to her running right back to JW's, once again being reproved (for the same thing she was before)...but I stuck by her. This last time, she decides she needs a fresh start and makes a major move to Atlanta - where she is involved with dating and living a full life (with non-JWs). During this time I get DF'd and am going through a lot of emotional and physical pain after being abused. And ya know what? This 'best friend' that I have always supported has the cojones to tell me that decides she wants to 'get right with Jehovah' and in doing that, will not be speaking to me anymore until I return. Mind you this time her 'getting right' did not include actually confessing her sins, but just going back to meetings and doing what she is supposed to per JWs...thus giving her NO disciplinary actions taken against her in the khall. WTF???? I have had this chicks back for YEARS - helping her out when her parents kicked her out, or she wanted to follow her own rules and felt her parents were too strict. And when I was at MY lowest - she turns her back on me. I have never forgotten that and all these years later, it doesn't hurt anymore but the hypocrisy of the whole situation is something me and my ex-JW friends will talk about here and there, and this girls name will be mentioned in those convos - as her fakeness is apparent.

    Fast forward to years later to this rap concert at a CLUB I was at last night. And who is standing right in front me of, with 2 other JW's? This girl! She and these other ladies are all dancing and singing rap lyrics, and then they recognize I am right behind them. Within 5 mins of them all recognizing me, they quick scurry off the dancefloor and out the club. So my gf's I am with comment how quickly the dancefloor cleared when these ladies left, and I jokingly said "they probably shouldn't have been here anyhow" - as my gfs have no idea who these ladies were or their beliefs.

    The whole scene was FUNNY to me!!! So this chick lives more of a wild (worldly) life then I have EVER lived...she walks in and out of the org like it's a revolving door - doing it on her own terms, which I respect. That I cannot be mad at her for. BUT, to be so adamant about not speaking to me or dealing with me, and yet have the nerve to be up in the CLUB at a rap concert dancing away - until you got caught. -hahahahaha. And I was in one of my FOH moods, and so I found her on FB and wrote her this snarky message as I wanted her to know that her presence there was noticed:

    "I saw you at the rap concert. Hope you and your JW friends has a good time at the club... :-)"

    This dumb chick waited until now to respond, but she said...

    "You were my best friend for years. And I miss you everyday. But if this is some attempt to incriminate me or just saying hi, then please remember what is going on with this world, and that you still know 'the truth' and what you should do to come back"

    I found her response ironic - as she purposely ignored what I said, and tried to flip it into a 'you need to come back' speech. - HAHAHAHA. JWs are the only group I know that can literally talk in circles when confronted on their own behavior or beliefs, yet, they feel they have the right to judge/convict others directly - claiming they and only they are backed by God. Right? Again....FOH!!! - LOL

  • Funchback
    Funchback

    Just curious.... 1. Who was headlining the show at the club? 2. Which song was she mouthing the words to?

    Anyhow, that must've been hilarious to see.

  • babygirl30
    babygirl30
    Method Man...who was singing "How High"...LOL!!!!!
  • stephanie61092
    stephanie61092

    I know EXACTLY how you feel. My best friend for 10 years knew ALL of my secrets and I knew hers (her biggies were: sleeping with her husband for 1+ years before they got married and still lied about their behavior to get married in the KH, AND having a close friendship with a DFd male friend and almost leaving her husband for him.)

    About 2 years ago, I came clean to the elders about all of my secrets and was reproved. I told her I did this and she was in total shock, but I said "I want to have a clean conscience and the elders were so kind. You need to do the same." She never did but I also never pressed the issue.

    Now right before I was getting DFd, she claimed we would still have our friendship, on the down low for her sake. This seemed fair since she had no issue hanging out with DFd people in the past including someone she had strong, romantic feelings for. She would just hang out with them in parts of town that she knew other JWs didn't go to.

    2 months into my disfellowshipping? I get a message saying that she misses me but she's "trying to do better spiritually" and won't be talking to me during this time. WTF?!?!?!

    Hypocrisy runs so high with JWs, it makes me sick.

  • JRK
    JRK

    The "Double Lifers" make me scratch my head too.

    JK

  • babygirl30
    babygirl30
    Yep Stephanie61092 - you get it!!! That is the worst kind of hypocrisy, but it doesn't make me angry anymore. As I see it, karma is a 'mutha' and these fake people eventually will suffer the circumstances of their own bull shit. The very fact that my ex friend responded in such a DEFENSIVE manner means she knows she was caught...and that was truly my reason in writing her. I bet you ANY money she won't mention my msg to her to anyone else...as that would incriminate her being at this concert at a club. But I wanted her to know she was caught, and that was my goal. Your ex friend seems like just as much of a winner as mine...lol.
  • babygirl30
    babygirl30
    Agreed JRK...although I did it for years. But it was SO tiring and time consuming, and the older I've gotten the more I see it being so fake. It's not worth it to me to do again, thus why I won't go back.
  • rebel8
    rebel8
    Sounds like you were a good friend and she is just a superficial manipulator.
  • ToesUp
    ToesUp

    The hypocrisy is through the roof in JW land. It is the main reason we left. After we left we learned TTATT. It gave me the answer I needed. Something just isn't right, what is it? I asked this question probably my entire life. TTATT answered that question, which gave me the peace of mind to leave and enjoy my life.

    We just wish our families could figure it out but we are not holding our breath.

  • ShirleyW
    ShirleyW

    I would call and elder in the Hall and say that I"m confused about a certain issue, and read and/or send him her msg and ask him to explain why you were Df'd but this girl goes back and forth like a revolving door and nothing has happened to her.

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