How Are Ex Elders Treated In The Congregation?

by minimus 40 Replies latest jw friends

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  scratchme1010

  Are they pretty much left alone? Are they respected for their having been elders at one time? Are they treated like crap?
  

  Depends, for what I remember. In the congregation where I grew up the elders hated each other and they were constantly involved in political fights over who was the most stuck up righteous hardcore JW. When one of them lost their "privilege" over something stupid like their son/daughter participating in some kind of extracurricular activity, the others were completely vicious.

  In other congregations the process was handled as if it was the disclosure of the nation's nuclear codes. In others it was more a laid back, careless event.
  
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  pale.emperor

  Never believe any elder that tells you "it's all confidential, whatever gets said in this room is just between us". My ex-father in law was, and still is, an elder. I knew ALL the gossip and judicial committee news. The elders and their wives pass them around at the dinner table and have a good laugh.

  At least they do in Speke congregation in Liverpool!
• 

  All or nothing

  The elders in the congregation my husband used to be an elder in, wouldn't even look at him or speak to him after he served there 8 plus years. Hypocrites! At some point he was fed up and so disgruntled that he told me there was no need for him to go there to be treated like he was invisible. He didn't do anything to not be serving, some sort of mix up when we moved to serve a local congregation that needed our help, that I can't reveal details without possible outing us. No one - his formal elder buddies...would stick out their selfish necks to help him so they just thought the loving thing to do is just ignore him till we went away- so we did. Their unloving behavior served to wake me up- so thank you selfish bastards!
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  OneGenTwoGroups

  I was explicit about my stepping down was due to doubts. And specifically about the generation of 1914 snafu.

  The elders haven't met with me in 3 years, which is wonderful. Since I always served as a pioneer/elder, being john q publisher has been quite the adjustment.

  I sense the "what the hell is wrong with you?" from people. In the end, most JWs understand the fact that the congregation is full of fucking weirdos, and I happen to be just another one of them now.
  
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  sparrowdown

  Jehovah's loving organization uses people and then throws them away - even elders.
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  doubtfull1799

  I can tell you from my own experience that Heb 6:10 does not apply, it goes out the window as fast as you leave. You are considered dangerous, toxic, poisonous, whatever...

  Except for one elder who still treats me like a friend, the others don't speak to me anymore unless they happen to run into me on the street. I did have a recent visit from two of them but that was to "investigate" reports of things I had posted online.

  I have received a couple of invites to things from regular brothers or sisters that still seem to think fondly of me (usually through my wife who still goes to meetings). NO invites from my fellow elders for over 18 months now. I have asked my wife to invite them over, but no.
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  dothemath

  In our circuit many of the congregations have more ex-elders than current ones.

  This has even been mentioned from the platform, but no one is reaching out. (That I know of)

  In our area it's mostly the elders who gave the most interesting talks that have stepped down.

  I'm sure some at least are PIMO.
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  punkofnice

  It depends on what the gossip is.

  As we know the jobos have a pecking order. Depending on whereabouts up the pecking order you are, depends on how much your boots a re licked. Let's not make any bones about this, human society in the main lives in a 'tribal' way. We haven't evolved much beyond that awful stage. The tribe of family, politics, race, religion, football and how you hang your bog roll. All tribal. Within those tribes we respect the loudest chimpanzee.

  Of course if the ex-elder has a lot of money, I'd question why he stepped, or was asked to step down. Normally, the rich elders stay in position or rise even further up that tribal pecking order.

  I hate scrambled egg. That's my tribe.
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  Chook

  Usually the half good ones step down and the tyrants rule with an iron fist. 14th century religious zealots have nothing on a elder with a Divine mission sent from Warwick. The whole point of religion is a confessional arrangement. The jw confessional process is steeped in paganism.
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  minimus

  When I resigned as an elder the circuit overseer year actually cried. He try to persuade me not to do it. My mind was made up and once he understood that he accepted it and for the most part left me alone. In the congregation, it seemed like most of the elders and congregation members thought I was just taking a break and that I would be back soon enough lol.