By Way of Announcement, Darlene Jefferson Has Been Disfellowshiped

by Cold Steel 21 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • Cold Steel
    Cold Steel

    I was watching a JW video where the announcement was made of a young lady's being disfellowshiped, and it happened in a regular KH Sunday meeting. This struck me as being a bit...cold.

    Is this when the shunning begins? I knew people get disfellowshiped, but I didn't realize it was that humiliating. Why don't they mount some strong computer controlled directional lights that can light up anyone in the congregation? That way you can make the announcement, darken the rest of the room and bring the flashing lights to bear on the poor soul. I mean, that would be really humiliating. You might even be able to drive the vile apostate to suicide!

    I guess this thing really is more of a society than a church. Are these people who are disfellowshiped actually likely to show up for the announcement? Were any of you guys present for the announcement when you were DF'ed? And when the meeting breaks, do people just treat the person like they're not there? Are you allowed to even nod at the people or do you just become invisible?

  • Chook
    Chook

    It's usually announced mid week meeting, yes shunning begins that day, the ones who show up for announcement believe this shows repentance for quicker return. I just can't get my head around how WT headquarters equates this embarrassment to love. WT needs to be sued for non compliance of freedom of religion.

  • laverite
    laverite

    Did they really say she had been disfellowshipped? I thought they simply say 'So and so is no longer one of Jehovah's Witnesses'.

  • pale.emperor
    pale.emperor

    Yes this is where the shunning starts. Right from that announcement. If she goes to the bathroom during the meeting right after that announcement she'll get glares from those in the seats and no one in the hallway or bathroom will even acknowledge she's there. Yes it would be very embarrassing and humiliating for her, and after the meeting she'll be expected to scurry away with her head down and try to navigate her way out of the KH with people in her way without actually saying a word to them.

    I didn't turn up for my announcement. I was already 100% out and have no intention of playing their game. Although i did go to the occasional meeting just so i could see my 2yo daughter.

    Funny you should mention shunning, only a few hours ago i was getting on a bus with my little girl and an elder and his wife were getting off. I smiled and said "hello" like any normal human being would, to which the elder replied "hello <daughters name>" and walked right past me.

  • Wait For It
    Wait For It

    I haven't been disfellowshipped, but I was publicly reproved once. I was told by my JC that I had to be present for the announcement or else they'd revisit their decision and disfellowship me (I was a teenager). So a part of being present for an announcement is to shame the individual. If you don't show up then it's assumed you aren't very repentant.

  • laverite
    laverite

    Pale,

    You wrote: 'Funny you should mention shunning, only a few hours ago i was getting on a bus with my little girl and an elder and his wife were getting off. I smiled and said "hello" like any normal human being would, to which the elder replied "hello <daughters name>" and walked right past me.'

    I know it's not funny. BUT...I couldn't help but laugh reading that. That kind of reaction is so ridiculously immature. I laugh but I also cringe a little too. And I'm sorry you had to go through that.

    If you were in a shop or around people in close proximity, you could always say out loud (just loud enough for others to hear) 'Are you really going to shun me in public because of the petty Jehovah's Witness rules? Why must Jehovah's Witnesses such a cruel people? Do you know what shunning has done to its victims? Do you not care?'

  • pale.emperor
    pale.emperor

    I know it's not funny. BUT...I couldn't help but laugh reading that. That kind of reaction is so ridiculously immature. I laugh but I also cringe a little too. And I'm sorry you had to go through that.

    Ah it's OK really, i didn't care. Fortunately when my daughters a little older she'll see people she knows blatantly ignoring me despite me being civil and friendly and know from the start it's not quite normal.

    The ironic thing is, this elder is the one that "reached out" to me when i handed my disassociation letter in. Advising me to take it back and sit on a judicial for apostasy instead so i could "set matters straight with Jehovah". I got DF'd. I would rather have left on my own terms.

  • Cold Steel
    Cold Steel
    Wait For It ยป I was publicly reproved once.

    What can one get publicly reproved for? Sounds like there is a great deal of discipline in the religion. If you're disfellowshiped, they don't say why at the podium, right? But if you're reproved, it almost begs the question.



  • laverite
    laverite

    Pale, you have a healthy attitude and outlook on the entire situation. This will serve you and your daughter very well in future. I am so glad that you will be able to provide a good example for her outside of the religion. There's a lot of irony, for sure. Interesting and so typical they wouldn't let you go out on your own terms, but seemed to want to have ultimate control. They almost seem to need that, perhaps as a way to deal with the cognitive dissonance that they surely must experience from time to time.

    Cold Steel - they don't announce what people did/didn't do during DFs or Public reproof. I think regardless of whether it's a DF or PR, people who don't know will wonder. There's usually at least a few and often more than a few who do know. Ultimately, most will know. And, this kind of thing takes on a life of its own -- often growing way out of proportion. You could have a sister being disfellowshipped for having an affair with a co-worker, and over a couple of weeks, this turns into having had sex with an entire football team in their locker room, multiple times whilst being filmed... The stories take on a life of their own.

  • millie210
    millie210

    They are not supposed to announce a DFing on Sunday. The reasoning (theirs) is that the Sunday meeting is for the public and the mid week meeting is more for the JWs.

    So somebody screwed up.

    Unless there is a reason why not, the announcement is made by the chairman of the judicial committee that rendered the decision.

    So its not like some hapless brother was handed a note and told to read it. It was a definite policy goof.

    I know! Lets disfellowship that elder! He was brazen!

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