Elders & Ex Elders, did knowing sins of congregation members change how you treated them?

Wasanelder Once

When you found out all the sins of fellow witnesses did it effect how you treated them? It was shocking when I found out the range of BS these people did to each other. I don't mean sexual abuse, I mean fraud, theft, infidelity and more. It became hard to look at some without seeing how full of shit they were. I admit I had no patience with some. They seemed just a day away from being found out as a repeat offender as far as I was concerned. I tried not to be judgmental or biased but in some cases is was self preservation. For a few it actually made me more compassionate. What of you? What was your experience with this conundrum?

Wasanelder Once

I give up. lol

LostGeneration

Haha don't ya hate it when your thread meets an untimely demise!

I was only for a coupla years, probably not even two. Fortunately I never had to put on the hip waders, so to speak. Only a couple of straightforward JCs for me, and neither one dealt with sex which looking back makes me sigh in relief.

What I did see was the absolute weirdness of the other elders behind closed doors. Certain one had their pet peeves about individuals. Others about certain "sins", they would view someone as immediately worthy of DFing if they had a bias against what they did.

Then the self righteousness itself, gack. It woke me up though, might still be in there if I stayed a lowly MS.

Hadriel

Hey @WasanelderOnce you may want to use simpler title's sometimes your titles are difficult to follow. I mean what you wrote is perfectly readable and I know it sounds stupid but it is at times received better when it is short and sweet. just my .02.

Wasanelder Once

Thanks Hadriel, appreciated.

Hadriel

..ha ha don't ask how I know this :)

to your question. yeah it is tough. the big fornication isn't remotely the most difficult things to be aware of. ppl blow it.

The fickle things are what make you wonder about folks. You mentioned some of them. it is an eye opener for sure when you come to know the happs. you quickly realize most have two personas sadly.

stuckinarut2

I know for a fact that many elders LOVE sharing the juicy details of "confidential" stuff to their inner circle of friends in a social setting!

Is that what you mean?

elderINewton

I did know a brother that had a hard time with porn. Well when I found that out I'll admit it was tough to shake his hand after.
That's about it

cha ching

My husband was an elder, and though he did not tell me anything, I always had to deal with hesitancy or not wanting to do things with brother/sistr a, b, c, d, e, f, g....

There were sooooo many JC's in our hall, and some pretty crummy stuff going on... so, yes.... it made it harder for my husband to 'relax, and have a good time,' around people that he knew to be not so nice..

freddo

In our hall it is easy to identify the recently "dealt with" - if they answered and stop answering they've had a private reproof. If they were running a microphone and are "not on zer list" they've had a private reproof. They were all over cart (non)witnessing and now they're not? = Private reproof.

The "best one" I knew of were the self-righteous finger pointing pioneer wife and the persistent porn problem elder husband who got caught by said wife! They were always on about "immodest clothing" worn by others. She went to pieces and came off of pioneering and he got removed from being an elder.

I had an un-christian feeling of grim satisfaction over that one.

Elders & Ex Elders, did knowing sins of congregation members change how you treated them?

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