Kids in my kingdom hall

by Akid48 29 Replies latest jw experiences

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  john.prestor

  Wake Me Up Before You Jo-Ho, thanks for the mention, and I agree with you: the movement also shames and dominates its children, albeit in different ways (as you mentioned). I can't believe your father treated you like that. It just goes to show that when this organization says "family" it means "male perogative" to hurt and control. And how ridiculous to punish you for the actions of other kids!

  Akid48: I wasn't raised a Witness, but I was raised in a very controlling, repressive church, and I would encourage you to distance yourself from it as much as possible, even if just mentally (critiquing what the speaker says in your head). These things shape you and influence you whether you want them to or not, and as soon as you can get out, I would strongly urge you to do so.
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  Wake Me Up Before You Jo-Ho

  Taste my pain, @stuckinarut2. The man is a hardass. At 19 when he was still delivering blows to my face, my mother had to negotiate with him to find new ways to discipline me since I was an adult. And that came after much pleading and appealing to her. For Geoffrey Jackson to flat out lie about corporal punishment within the organization was just another slap in the face.

  Thanks, @john.prestor. I appreciate that. I know it's ridiculous to vicariously punish other children through me - but hey, "shame and domination" is the name of the game.
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  sir82

  Just be glad you weren't around 40 years ago.

  Then, it was kids getting dragged (sometimes literally) to the "back room" to get beaten.

  The kids would know what was coming, and scream and cry something awful.
  
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  Tallon

  @ sir82

  I'm in my mid 50's and can testify to having experienced corporal punishment, both from my father and teachers at school.
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  john.prestor

  The thought occurred to me too that that shame and domination applies to the organization's expectations that children proselytize to their classmates, which inevitably does not succeed, and overtly exclude themselves from fun activities (holidays, birthdays). So then you're embarrassed and the organization offers you the only acceptance and pride you can find. But that's contingent on you submitting to them: cross them, and they'll reject you too.

  Was that ever your experience, Wake Me Up Before You Jo-Ho? Or yours, Akid48?
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  scruffmcbuff

  @wakemeup

  Reading all that makes me sick. So glad your out and safe.
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  Londo111

  The meetings are long and boring, even for adults. I'm sure the Governing Body even finds it hard to sit through the meetings. There is absolutely nothing of interest to children.But they are expected to sit quietly, at the very least, for two hours. And if they are a little older, to follow along.

  I remember hearing a story that when I was a baby I was making a disturbance at the meeting and so my father took me out back and spanked me. I think from a very early age I was scared into being absolutely quiet at the Kingdom Hall. My mother took it on herself to spank children of single mothers (those without a JW husband with them) if they acted up.

  Kids being dragged into the bathroom and crying was a common occurrence at meetings. The elders counseled the congregation not to beat their children out front, facing the road, because passerby had noticed. They urged parents to be more "discreet".

  I was quiet at the meetings. But I got spanked at home for other reasons. Like the time I accidentally discovered cuss words on the bathroom wall at school and asked my schoolmate, who reported it to the teacher, who promptly reported it to my parents.

  Once, my father spanked me purple and blue. One time he threw a shoe at me. Another time he kicked me. Another time he smacked me with an iron rod. When I was 17 or 18, he took his belt and went to town on my back because I called him out for saying a cuss word.

  But overall, I had it better than many of y'all.
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  Dunedain

  There is an underlying "air" of physical abuse specifically within the WTBS, concerning parents and young children. Their go to scripture is the "Use the rod" scripture. Its almost like a get out of jail free card for beating your kid.

  The sick thing about it, is that its almost a badge of "spirituality" for parents. The Elders have to make sure their kids are well behaved little JW clones, so NO misbehaving can be tolerated, hence a good "crack" on the head.

  The up and coming MS servants young kids must be obedient, if they are gonna reach out for more privileges, hence the "slap" to the face.

  The single sister raising her kids in the "truth", must show that she knows how to teach her kids "right and wrong", hence the "dragging them crying to the back school".

  ALL of this is accepted, and literally encouraged by the R&F. There is NEVER anyone standing up for the children in their halls. There is NEVER any thought that, "hey maybe these poor kids are bored to death", and its NORMAL for a little acting out, and it is NOT normal to expect toddlers to sit still for 2 hours straight.

  The funny thing is, the ONLY time i ever remember there being a local needs talk concerning children and misbehaving, was not saying maybe we are being too harsh on our kids. NOPE, instead it was specifically about embarrassing a brother whos 3 year old son would sometimes talk or make some noise during the meetings, and that the congregation had a "problem" of children interrupting their precious talks from the podium.

  The result from that local needs was that the brother and sister whom it was intended for, left the congregation with their child, and started attending another hall, and all the remaining kids started getting their asses beaten and dragged to the back room, more often.

  Good job guys!!! Its all about pushing the "perfect JW image", while abusing your children.
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  john.prestor

  The sad truth is this: children are a threat to the organization's attempts at control. It's kinda like Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunate Events where the children always perceive the situation better than the adults. The kids are bored, and so are the adults, but the adults are polite enough, and yes Dunedain, career-oriented enough to stay quiet about it. The kids won't, they're bored and they express it vocally, so they have to be disciplined into silence.
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  Whynot

  The reason I stopped going to the meetings was because my kids are sooo freakin loud and crazy. Special needs kids and I refused to spank them. Well, the elders decided to do a local needs about making your children sit quietly during the meetings. The elder who gave the talk doesn't even have children! He encouraged parents to take their children to the bathroom and discipline them to get them to sit quietly. No thank you!

  I spoke to other Jehovah's Witnesses parents of special needs children and they talked about the lack of understanding within the organization when it comes to our kids. One JW said it's eaier to be Catholic in our situation. Everyone in the kingdom hall thinks we can just spank it out of them, really? A lot of these parents don't even go to any of the conventions it's too much of a burden.