Gossip

by Rattigan350 11 Replies latest jw friends

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  Rattigan350

  Question for former elders:

  How much of your time was spent quelling gossip and rumors floating around. I'm not talking about CSA type stuff, just regular insignficant stuff that people occupied their time over.
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  HiddlesWife

  There was always, within the past congs my family members and I went to, a plethora of gossip and slander. It didn't matter whether a dub was PIMI (Super or Plain), PIMO, or PIMQ, in addition to the POMOs, DA'd and DF'd exjws. If a dub DIDN'T PERSONALLY LIKE NOR RESPECT another dub, there was bound to be slander/hearsay--even if the info was about something very minute. The Borg has also subliminally influenced their membership--in addition to some who have had issues in this area prior to conversion and this cultcorporation exacerbated these--to be suspicious, therefore causing some of the R&F with these personality traits to become the worst tattletalers out there!

  Also, as a former RP, I had brothers, uncles, and cousins who were elduhs and MSs. They divulged, after their leaving the Borg, all about the above and more.
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  LongHairGal

  RATTIGAN350:

  Elders didn’t ‘quell’ anything.

  If anything, they told their wives. Then these stupid women told every douchebag pioneer (who actually felt entitled to know EVERYTHING about everybody). I’m not exaggerating when I say everything.

  I came to know gossip of a very personal and embarrassing nature about certain people there. This could only have gotten out if some elder opened his mouth. Somebody revealed a tidbit that some stunted born-in in the hall was a source of much gossip and made sure any new brother came to know the dirt on people. I believe this person came to know these things from their mom who was an older pioneer and heard much!

  Also, what happens when an elder leaves or steps down? What happens to all the confidential info they came to know? They aren’t held to the confidentiality standard of an attorney or a doctor..The JW religion is a silly thing..So, Everybody is at the mercy of an ex-elder’s discretion. This is assuming he even has any.

  I hope nobody believes they have any confidentiality in this stupid chaotic religion/organization or whatever you want to call it. Anything about anybody has been repeated by many ignorant and unaccountable people.
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  LongHairGal

  HIDDLESWIFE:

  Everything you say is true, especially the part about if a JW is not liked by another their reputation will be trashed..I also agree that the religion encourages snitching and gossiping. In fact, they go hand in hand.

  Also what you said about knowing elders and MSs’ who divulge things is sad and I have known about this all along. There is No confidentiality and certainly No accountability.

  I will say this though: I knew of old time elders who would Never do this. But the old adage about ‘the chain is only as strong as its weakest link’ holds true. It makes No difference if five elders are ‘by the book’ and discreet and there is One who doesn’t care and opens his mouth!..The secrets are out and the cat is out of the bag.

  But, the heart of the matter: in my opinion I truly do not believe the Witnesses REALLY care about confidentiality or anybody’s privacy. They are the antithesis of privacy. They only give lip service to the idea of privacy. Anybody who believes they really care about the average R&Fs privacy, dignity or rights has been fooled.
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  vienne

  I'm not a Witness, certainly never an elder. But I have uncles who are both. So I asked. Uniform answer was that harmless personal talk is not worth an Elder's attention. Harmful gossip, that is untrue and harms someone's reputation is worth an Elder's personal attention.

  For what it's worth, that's their answer.
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  Longlivetherenegades

  Have equally heard a person who disassociated from the religious organization and the rumours that came out after the person's disassociation was he either committed fornication or stole from the congregation.

  I am not aware of what those leading men in that congregation did to quell that. I know the evidence before them though regarding that person was never what those gossip carried.

  That experience proved true that there is never a clean way to leave the religious organization of WTBTS.
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  hoser

  This just goes to show that the jws are no different from the world. Gossip in the congregation reeks of office politics in the corporate world.
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  RULES & REGULATIONS

  Elders didn’t ‘quell’ anything.
  If anything, they told their wives. Then these stupid women told every douchebag pioneer (who actually felt entitled to know EVERYTHING about everybody). I’m not exaggerating when I say everything.

  There was a family of six who attended my old congregation. Husband, wife, three teen girls,19... 17... 15... and a younger brother. At our Tuesday night Ministry School meeting, the elder announced that the 15 year old was disfellowshipped.

  The family left the 15 year old at home alone, while the rest of the family attended the 3 meetings during the week. I found that to be cruel punishment. Child services should have been called on the family.

  I found out from my mom that she was disfellowshipped for ''fornicating'' with her ''worldly boyfriend.'' Who told my mom? How did that information get out? It probably came from one of the gossiping elder's wife. Elders tell their wives everything. Most wives do keep secrets, but some gossip falls through the cracks.
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  Mickey mouse

  Some of the elders were the worst gossips of all!
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  smiddy3

  In my experience Elders wives were the principle gossip makers in a congregation where a lot of it started.

  In my 32 years as an active JW I attended 6 different congregations and was a friend of a few Elders and their wives,

  Nudge ,nudge ,wink wink.