Why it's a waste of time talking to JW's

by Phizzy 24 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

• 

  Phizzy

  I believe it to be a waste of time talking to, reasoning with, JW's if you expect any kind of quick result.

  Many of us when we first wake up think that 'coz TTATT is blindingly obvious to us, it will soon get through to our JW loved ones.

  This simply isn't so for a couple of important reasons. The first is that, if someone believes something is True, or The Truth, to them it really is, without doubt, true. So whatever you say must be wrong somehow.

  The second problem is that JW's simply do not have to use, or pay any attention to facts and logic. An attendant problem is that I have noticed most of them do not pay attention to what you actually say anyway.

  I do however think that, kindly and thoughtfully put, our words may very well plant a seed, so do not give up altogether, just don't expect miracles.
• 

  stan livedeath

  try all you like--but a simple fact of life is-----

  ---you cannot polish a turd.
• 

  sparky1

  

  ---you cannot polish a turd. - stan livedeath

  But you can build your 'metaphorical' house out of turds by believing everything the GOVERNING BODY(tm) says through the pages of the WatchTurd magazine.
• 

  goingthruthemotions

  Man, i will tell you what....talk with my wife about TTATT is a waste of time. let her be blind, i could give a crap.
• 

  Alive!

  This past weekend hubby and I bumped into a couple of witnesses in our age group on two separate occassions in very relaxed circumstances (unplanned) we chatted, laughed and enjoyed each others company over coffee - we've shared some good times in the past and in the past shared some fellow feeling over life's problems, I love these people - but really, as I reflected overnight, their world is tight, they are supported, their children and lifelong friends are an essential fabric of their lives.

  We didn't talk about religion. I miss the freedom to have people like these in my life - without the GB breathing down our necks, publishing articles and broadcasting pronouncements which are designed to agitate and separate.
• 

  Introvert 2

  Funny ( a frustrating story ) : I often pass along WT Critical info to FB friends that were or are connected to JW in some way. One fellow in particular whom I've known for 15 years faded out completely over a decade ago.

  Guy has some pretty sketchy acquaintances and is known for being a ladies man ( haha ) but all in all still an ok guy. Anyhow he recently asked me to stop sending him clips from the WT critical FB groups as he says that although he's not apposed ( his lifestyle certainly is ) he has no problems with the 'society'. BTW this guy was coerced into baptism at a young age and never reproved or DF'ed.

  Anyways pretty pathetic considering the crap I endured as an adult going through all the hoops till I found out I had been duped. So this guy does as he pleases, gets layed left and right no problems and still tight with family. I on the other hand DA on account of doing what I feel is right and having integrity to not BS nor lie to anyone. I guess he does what he has to do to simply be and stay faded but the fact he still stands up for the 'society' and not even consider or open his mind to what I send him upsets me a little. We still talk and share a hobby but it's weird. To each his own just thought I'd share this.
• 

  Coded Logic

  I've never understood this line of reasoning. Every single one of us on this forum CHANGED OUR MINDS because we were confronted with some evidence that we just couldn't rationalize anymore. And the more we sought answers from the WT the more we realized what a house of cards their theology is.

  No, you can't deconvert a JW in a single conversation. But it doesn't always take massive earthquakes to start an avalanche. Often it's a single snow flake that gets the ball rolling. And sometimes even one small point can have a profound impact upon the mind.

  I should also point out that people don't change their minds because they "want to". Rather, people change their minds because they have no choice but to. Who knows what sorts of doubts and logical inconsistencies a JW may be noticing. Taking a moment to point out a few more is hardly a waste of time.

  Using inclusive language can be hugely beneficial. Saying things like "how can we know that?" - "I understand that's what you believe but how can we tell if it's actually true?" - "do you think that we should have good reasons for believing the things we believe?" - can force them to think instead of just having emotional reactions.

  All in all, I believe that people should have good reasons for believing the things they believe. And it therefore follows that if I want to change other people's minds (JWs included) I have an obligation to give them good reasons for doing so.

  Simply saying "they'll never change their minds therefore I won't even try" isn't only wrong - it's also intellectually lazy.
• 

  punkofnice

  You're right. It's slow progress if any. I know jws that will never leave because they simply don't want to. Confirmation bias.
• 

  Satan

  It wasn't slow for me,

  I have always been a fan of science,

  it only took me some reading to realize it was all bs.
• 

  Xanthippe

  It depends on the personality type I think. There are people in my extended family who say things like I don't do texting, I don't do ATMs, I don't buy things online it's not safe. My relatives seem very stubborn, emotional, paranoid and they hate change. So it's no surprise that the JWs among them want to snuggle down in their comfort zone and keep the status quo. Struggling against these people since childhood has profoundly affected the way I see others and I really have to fight the urge to give up on people because of my 'brick wall' relatives.

  I don't think all families are like this Phizzy. Some people are more cerebral and they like to think, they enjoy reading and learning new things and while not relishing change can see the need for it. God knows why I am different from them but that's genetics for you. The genes fall differently every time. Apparently my maternal grandmother had a brother who went to sea and travelled the world. He was a real explorer and loved change. Now there was a relative I should have liked to have met.