My message is not for Northern Girl. It's for the rest of us here.
Did you notice that God is no part of the picture that Northern Girl presented to us? She seeks, not reinstatement with God, but with imperfect and heartless men. If she wanted God, she never would have ventured near this forum. God, as she comprehends him through the teachings of the WT Society, is examining her heart. Where was her heart when she came here to be in the midst of "apostates"? Surely she knew her God is fiercely against her doing so, as the WT so often emphasizes! She said the shunning was too much for her, but what about the condemnation of her ultra strict WT God? Was she able to face him in prayer or otherwise when she knew she was blatantly disobeying everything he stands for?
According to the one she views as God, we are among his worst enemies, even agents of his arch-enemy the Devil. Does she think she has his forgiveness now simply because she fooled his human agents? They think she is truly repentant and sorry, but he knows better. He knows she is deceptive and will lie to men about what she really is just to get their approval. She knows he bitterly opposes lying and deception when dealing with his appointed elders or any representatives of his organization. They are not like the enemy with whom she is free to wage "theocratic warfare." She has employed such treacherous strategy against the theocratic organization itself!
She tells us, "Well, my prayers have been answered and I am reinstated." Her prayers to who? Has her God listened with pleasure to her prayers? How could he when she has dealt treacherously with him and his representatives? Or does he feel that lying isn't nearly as bad as smoking? Does he think we can lie to the elders to our heart's content, as long as we no longer puff on a cigarette? That seems to be her belief.
On the other hand, if her God is not pleased with lying, who are the ones who have answered her prayers? Isn't it the elders? Do you see how she has placed her elders above God? She knows her God would never oblige a hypocrite which is what she has been. Ah, but the elders? They have no idea how faithless and treacherous she has been to her God and to them. But to her, that doesn't matter. What matters is that the elders are willing to have her back. They mean far more to her than the one she claims is her God.
How did she feel when the power outage caused a delay in her reinstatement? One might wonder if she approached her God to thank him profusely for an extension of opportunity to show that she is really sorry, not only for having been a smoker, but also for being such a deceptive liar. Did she think God was responsible for the delay because she had not been true to him or to the elders? I, for one, tend to doubt that the thought ever crossed her mind.
She tells us that she "never wanted out." Out of what? A human organization, or a peaceful relationship with God? The answer is obvious. She's happy now, because, despite not knowing where she stands with the one she claims is her God, she is being welcomed back by her real God, the WT organization.
Like most JWs, she believes that God in heaven is an old softy towards JWs, that he doesn't mind what they do, as long as they please the men on earth who claim to be his true servants. He's such an easy-going old gent that he doesn't even mind if she smokes. It wasn't HIS decision to throw her out. He's never said a word anywhere about the practice. Really, he hasn't. So, he's not the one that Northern Girl is interested in pleasing and winning over. She wants to please those she really has to fear--those elders who follow, not the guidebook of God, but the rulebook of the feared and dreaded WT Society!
She knows very well that we are despised by the Society and the elders, but how did she bid us adieu? Did you notice? She wrote: "I take my leave and wish everyone well." What if her elders knew she said that? God knows, but she doesn't think he cares. But if the elders ever found out, the shunning would go on for probably several years if not until the day she dies.
I am not condemning Northern Girl. I was that way once. I hope I'm not anymore. I also lived in daily dread and fear of other elders even though I was one myself. God knew my thoughts and deeds, and often I asked him to forgive me. But y'know sumpin'? I begged far more for his forgiveness when I knew the elders also knew of my little misdeed here or my big stumble there. That's when I really sweated it out! Like Little Miss Northern Girl, I worshipped men far more than I had regard for the one I claimed to be serving.
I hope Northern Girl wakes up someday to reality, as I feel I did. I do know that humans no longer take centre stage in my life except to the extent that I want to do good things for them. I don't live in fear of them. Instead, after I left the WT Society I discovered what it means to love them. I hope that someday Northern Girl has enough love even for her elders so that she won't lie to them. I also hope that someday she loves God enough to respect what he thinks far more than what mere sinful mortals think.
