I feel bad i just faded away and did not "come out" as an Apostate hater. My mum died refusing blood and still I hang back my wife still has Witness friends and goes to the memorial every year.
Are faders like me just cowards? Should I show my face?
by Witness 007 20 Replies latest jw experiences
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Witness 007
Oh of course this would mean being disfellowshiped.
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a watcher
In my opinion, fading is the best way to leave JWs. It's the least traumatic.
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smiddy3
Don`t beat yourself up Witness 007 everybody has the right to leave anyway they want to.And in your case I wouldn`t do any thing rash your wife still has friends in the religion and still goes to the memorial you say ,do you want to really upset the apple cart ? and cause a lot of stress in your marriage ? Your OK
Leave things be . And no, none of you are cowards ,you just have different circumstances to deal with.
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joe134cd
Yup I agree with the posters here. I’m a fader as well. I’m happy to be mentally and physically out, just can’t be bothered upsetting the apple cart with a JC. Don’t try and fix what isn’t broken.
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Biahi
You don’t have to play by their rules! I’m a long time fader (35+) years. Never disfellowshipped or disassociated.
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BluesBrother
I faded successfully some years back. Now I am under the radar, known to the cong as a “husband “ . The home situation is good with my wife and I happier than we ever used to be despite our different views on the WTS. She is in good standing, I can converse with anyone I like and be sociable to her friends ( when lockdown permits)
Some might call me hypocritical,or cowardly. I view it as the successful saving of our marriage,and on my terms.
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Fadeaway1962
A Great crowd of faders out there ,why because WE care for our family's and want even limited association with them even though they would immediately shun us if we openly admit our views of the org and it's teaching's .
So we're not cowards we are caring people.
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minimus
Fading is smart , plain and simple. Plus they are not your lords and masters any longer. They have no authority over you
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DesirousOfChange
It's much easier to discreetly "sow seeds" of discontent as a Fader than if you are "out" and thus shunned.