Is disassociating worth the hassle? (page 2)

flipper

HERELGO- I think it's different for different folks depending on each person's situation. I haven't disassociated because I have an adult JW daughter and a grandson in the mix who I wouldn't be able to have any contact with if I DAed myself.

That being said - if you don't have ANY relatives or friends who are JW's and you no longer keep in contact with them anyway- I feel a person could disassociate. But like Blues Brother said - if the elders are leaving you alone anyway and not bothering you- it might be unwise to put yourself back on their radar after being out 6 years anyway. There's no reason to give these clowns any more power over us or there's no reason to play by their rules and definitions of contact if we don't have to. So it's a personal decision. I always had so much shit thrown on me from the elders in 44 years in the cult- I just don't want any more hassles in my life. I prefer peace of mind. Hope that gives you some things to consider. Take care, Peace out, Mr. Flipper

DesirousOfChange

Personally I do not recognize them as having any authority over me, or any right to a formal resignation (DA).

"Disassociation" and "disfellowshipping" are JW terms and JW Rules. I refuse to play by their rules any longer. . . . Doc

HereIgo

I appreciate the responses. I guess it wouldn't make sense to DA since I am off the radar. I do have certain family in, like my mom and a few sisters. DA would ruin any future chance of reconciliation.

millie210

Sorry. Double post.

millie210

DesirousOfChange
Personally I do not recognize them as having any authority over me, or any right to a formal resignation (DA).
"Disassociation" and "disfellowshipping" are JW terms and JW Rules. I refuse to play by their rules any longer. . . . Doc

Same here.

Their little ceremonies no longer have any meaning for me and they never did have any legal standing or any meaning in the real world.

I, walked away from them.

End of that story.

eewx2

My husband and I disassociated. I wanted to make a clean break so I could celebrate holidays and do whatever I wanted. In doing so, I lost my parents and brother. I must say I miss them, but still feel I made the right decision-for ME. Everyone must choose for themselves and I definitely can see why a lot of you haven't done it. Also when I left I didn't really know about fading. I had a very all or nothing view.

millie210

eewx2 you raise a good point.

Each circumstance has its own variables and we should all be able to do what is right for us and get the full support of our community here while we do it.

If someone wants to celebrate the holidays and not have the hassle of the witnesses having an "opinion" on that, I can see how it would definitely make disassociating an option.

DesirousOfChange

I, walked away from them. ~ Millie

Way to go! Never stop! Just keep on walkin'!

Xanthippe

My husband and I sent a letter of resignation not of disassociation to the congregation, although in their eyes it's the same of course but it made us feel we were playing by our rules.

It was the right thing for us. We were so messed up by pioneering for years and my husband being a MS then an elder we needed a clean break to get our life back together and get our health back. As others have said we didn't know about fading back then.

Do what's right for you. If you dont want JWs bothering you to go back and you aren't afraid of losing family and friends it's a way to be free and clear.

NewYork44M

Congregations have a short attention span and a high turnover. If you send a letter after 6 years chances are few would remember who you are and even fewer would care.

My suggestion is to write the letter, open a bottle of wine and light up the fireplace. Burn the letter and toast to your new found freedom.

Is disassociating worth the hassle?

Sorry. Double post.

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