Hello thread. I have been busy with my education for the last weeks (exams
and alike), but I just got some time to read all these responses. You can’t
even imagine my joy in seeing the kind, and most importantly honest truth-seeking,
replies you have written to me. Man, oh man! Haven’t seen one "ad
hominem" argument yet - you have no idea how much that means to me!
One of you said I should be careful, and how I wish I had read that comment
a bit sooner. Just bringing a fraction of the things I talked about up, caused
a major stir, and I have been "turned in" to the authorities.
I made my father promise that we would look at these things I had found
privately, out of fear for the Elders. A fear I openly and logically explained
to him. He understood…
Imagine the chock when I found out he had found a way to tell an Elder that
didn’t go against his conscience. I brought it up to him when an Elder
contacted me, but he just said the Elder figured it out by himself because of
the questions my father had asked that Elder – to explain, my father just
forwarded the well written document I had written regarding my findings. That
Elder could immediately see that it was my style of writing. My father hadn’t told
anyone anything with his mouth – there is however many ways of forwarding messages.
Imagine how I felt when the one person I trusted did this to me. A trust I openly
said I had to him.
I am now forced to conduct a study with an elder to get to the bottom of
these “claims”. As the elder said: I will not let go of you (he was referring
to me as a friend), and you know the consequences of talking with others about
this (referring to me as an Elder). It will not be accepted.
My response was: I have no intent of pressing my beliefs onto others. (The
awkward silence after that was monumental)
My dad turned out to be a completely different man also, and even getting
physical when I said things that questioned the integrity of the Watchtower.
The almost daily "ad hominem" arguments proves to be extremely
stressing, especially when I expected differently from my father. The last
person I trusted on earth turns so easily on me when I don’t agree with him -
how saddening this has been. Even simple questions now result in me getting
reminded of how I own nothing here at home, and I should just obey (I am 18
years of age), and if I wont "shut up" about my thoughts I will be
thrown out.
My response: Dad - you have continuously used this argument, along with
other emotionally loaded arguments, so you cannot expect me to take these
threats seriously anymore. If you want me to understand you, and agree with
you, you should learn from history, and use other methods than the despotic
methods you are currently using.
This resulted in him dragging me (Remind yourself that I am 18) into my
room and saying I should "shut up" or I would get thrown out. He
demanded respect. I then explained him the basis for respect and tolerance,
which he did not take all the well too. Now I am getting drowned in messages
and e-mails from him, linking to the good deeds of the WTS. I find it ironic
that the one person who raised me in the "art" of peace treats his
own son like this. This is even after a deep talk about the Prodigal Son in the
Bible.
Personally, this has been very stressing, I have however experienced worse,
unfortunately, which is why I have been able to remain calm throughout the
deafening volumes of my father’s responses, and his physical methods. I am capable
of defending myself, but I know when not to, as not doing anything most likely
will have a larger effect on my father, and mother, who watches from the
sideline. It is to be said that I have been “raised” (I have been alone in my
thoughts the most of my childhood) along my sister (now 19 years of age), who
has OCD, Autism and Borderline. The positive aspect of this peril has been my
increased independence from my parents, and the ability to go through tough
periods alone. An independence which has now almost expanded to the
economics in response to the increasing threats of me getting thrown out.
One of you also asked me to clarify why it was hard to get onto my current
education. The Danish educational system from my perspective is like this:
Folkeskole: Year 0-9/10
Gymnasie: Year 10/11-13/14 or Basic education like for example carpenter or
electrician, which is three years.
The Gymnasie opens the University up. Initially I went, even though I
wanted to go to the gymnasie right after folkeskole, but wasn’t allowed by my
parents, to the carpenter school. Because Jesus was a carpenter I told myself.
One week later I quit because the math’s were for me, too easy, and not
challenging for a young fresh mind. I still wasn’t allowed by my parents to go
to the gymnasie, so I started on Technical drawing, AutoCAD and all that.
Completed that in a year instead of two, but couldn’t go anywhere with it
because I was too young (only 16). At that time, I decided to get baptized -
this then proved to be enough for me to get onto Gymnasie.
My study of the Watchtower has lead me to a myriad of things that I personally
find morally wrong – but I am only a couple of months in, in what will be a
long study. Thank you for all these best of wishes.
I am currently fueling my anger and frustration towards researching even
more.
