I wasn't so sure how to add title in this topic. I went back to the Borg, for family reasons and the concept was after a year or so to fade out. I m into the fade out process now. Does any one know, how to "change" congregation and loose the publisher files during the relocation? Just to avoid, unnecessary comments, I live alone, while my family members are in another country, so I don't give to anyone any account about my actions. The reason I went back, was purely for my elderly parents.
Suggestions how to fade out/ changing congregation and loosing your files
by JustHuman14 10 Replies latest watchtower beliefs
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The Fall Guy
You have a PM with some crucial points to apply when fading. I wish you as peaceful a fade as me and my better half have experienced. (so far)
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DesirousOfChange
With WT going to digital Cong record keeping, "getting lost" is going to be more difficult, so do it now.
Move to a new Cong, have your Pub Cards transferred. Don't be too regular at the new Cong. Just sporadic attendance. No Field Circus. Get a "throw away" cell phone to give them for contact, so you can later throw it away without losing your real contacts.
Once time has allowed for the Cards to be transferred, try the neighboring Cong or two Congs, of more. Then hit them back-and-forth, so no one really knows where you are (not) attending, but you can always tell them you were at the "other" Cong.
Then make a big move and tell no one. (Try a relocation with this move.)
If they know your active JW family, they might still track you down.
Good luck!
The greatest revenge is living a happy & successful life!
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scratchme1010
Does any one know, how to "change" congregation and loose the publisher files during the relocation?
Start attending meetings in the new congregation. It's that simple. I have more to say but I'm afraid that might fall into the "unnecessary comments" category.
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flipper
JUST HUMAN- Just stop attending period. If you're not giving anyone account of your actions anyway- just totally go rogue and get off the JW /elder radar by not having any communication whatsoever with your former elders, congregation - anything ! No need to get a card from them or anything ! Like Paul Simon said in " 50 Ways to leave your lover " - " just drop off the key lee, and set yourself free ! " Easy as that.
You will find that the stress level in your life goes away even more when you totally cut yourself off from the congregation and elders who kept check on you. It's how I did it , been out 15 years now . My JW parents still kept in touch with me when they were alive, we just didn't talk about JW topics. You might try this and see how it works for you. Good luck to you,take care, Peace out, Mr. Flipper
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LongHairGal
DESIROUS OF CHANGE:
Sounds a little extreme....It’s bad enough somebody would spend money on a throwaway phone, but I can’t believe somebody would actually MOVE their residence to escape JWs. All that?? Just to avoid verbal confrontation??
The bottom line is if you want OUT they will know it - eventually..There’s no hiding this fact. The days of “fading” painlessly are over. I’m sorry for anyone who has family there. It’s going to be tough.
Stick to just being simple. Just stop attending like Flipper said. Look before you answer the door and screen phone calls. Block them if they persist.
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Brokeback Watchtower
Just stop going. Live your life and do your own thing don't let this slimy mind control cult use up any more of your life.
Stop going and start living your own life the way you see fit, find out who you are away from any control by this willfully ignorant bunch of psychos called the Governing Body and their equally ignorant ass kissing yes men they surround themselves with.
To give meaning to one's life means a separation from comfortable herd mentality to find one's self and follow your DNA and become your most authentic self. Self Actualization, Wholeness, the works.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Metamotivation
Metamotivation is a term coined by Abraham Maslow to describe the motivation of people who are self-actualized and striving beyond the scope of their basic needs to reach their full potential. Maslow suggested that people are initially motivated by a series of basic needs,[1] called the hierarchy of needs. Maslow states, "Self-actualizing people are gratified in all their basic needs (of belongingness, affection, respect, and self-esteem)".[2] Once a person has successfully navigated the hierarchy of needs thus satisfying all their basic needs, Maslow proposed they then travel "a path called growth motivation".[3]
Maslow believed that a distinction must be made between the motives of those who operate at or below the level of self-actualization (ones still striving for their basic needs, or ones who have met their basic needs but still live without purpose), and those who are self-actualized who are also with significant purpose, as their motivations differ significantly.[4] Deficiency needs (drives or D-needs) motivate people to satisfy physiological needs such as hunger, sex, love, whereas being needs (B-needs[5]) propel a person beyond self-actualization and drive them to fulfill their inherent ultimate potential.[6]
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Brokeback Watchtower
JUST HUMAN- Just stop attending period. If you're not giving anyone account of your actions anyway- just totally go rogue and get off the JW /elder radar by not having any communication whatsoever with your former elders, congregation - anything ! No need to get a card from them or anything ! Like Paul Simon said in " 50 Ways to leave your lover " - " just drop off the key lee, and set yourself free ! " Easy as that.
Yes that! Well said Flip. I plainly told them all they can just go fuck themselves during a JC meeting letting them know they have no authority over me. I couldn't be any other way once I found out it was all bull shit.
Anyway that's where I'm coming from and I don't expect other to follow what I did, but the need for a more cautious leaving I recognize for our circumstances all are different. I'm all for diminishing as much control from this evil organization as possible in what ever way works best for the individual.
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Incognito
I agree as others, cut all ties.
Parents who have been long-term JW's will often not be as concerned with their adult child's 'official' status as they are with the fact they are not attending meetings. Non-attendance often becomes evident fairly quickly as social visits typically resort to discussions of JW topics and a non-attendee will often not fully understand what is being mentioned or respond as appropriate. This can cause the devout parents to begin to question the adult child and limit association.
If you are adamant to transfer your file to another cong, you could choose a congregation some distance away from where you actually live. Attend only a few times under the premise that you were relocated there by your employer or you obtained a new job in the area. Due to training for your new position, your meeting attendance may not be regular initially, but that will change once training has completed. If asked to provide an address, you could claim you are currently at a temporary location until a suitable permanent residence is found.
Once your records are transferred, ask the new elders to forward your records to a different nearby congregation as you will soon be moving to a permanent address within that congregation's territory. If they do forward your file, those elders will soon forget about you, and the 'new' congregation won't know who you are as they have never even met you. Since both congregations are located a substantial distance from where you actually live and as no members have seen much of you, there is little expectation anyone will remember you even if you ever did run into them elsewhere.
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DesirousOfChange
Long Haired Gal -- it just depends on how much you want "out" without being "outed" and it depends on how much your are worth pursuing or stalking by your local BOE in an effort to "getcha". And, you're wrong about it not making any difference ("they will know" / "no hiding the fact"). Guess what? No one knows where our Pub Rec Cards are! Lost in the shuffle while we are just "stumbled" and "inactive" and "spiritually weak" and, evidently, associate with some "other Cong".
YMMV
Doc