I am so very sorry for the hurt you and your husband feel. I am sorry for the pain of missing the relationship you wish you had, or could have, with your husband's mother. But always remember, it is ALL her choice. You go on and live happy lives. Remember you did NOTHING wrong. NOTHING wrong.
Time will heal the wound of this callous shunning to the point of not stinging so much. But remember, never once do you or your husband ever take on the blame the mother in law is trying to place.
You wish for love and acceptance. It is HER choice within the mind control of that cult. You have no control over that, unfortunately.
(((((HUGS) to you.