So I'm guessing this will be the court proceedings.
Please state you full name to the court. Mr John Cedars - for the record is this your real name Mr Cedars - No, my real name is Lloyd Evans - is this your real name Mr Evans?
We are here with the magnificent seven (cue western music and gunfire with the odd Yeeehaaah for effect) please in your words Mr I have no real name why you are here in court today.
Five seconds later.
The court finds the magnificent seven not guilty of charges that Mr no real name has committed himself.
Cue gun shots directed at the ceiling and lots of western style dancing with upbeat music composed by Ennio Morrican and Mike spitting into a bin.