meet ups or support ?

by lonliwon 9 Replies latest jw friends

  • lonliwon
    lonliwon

    My wife and I have been long time lurkers here and are now members .

    We were wondering if anyone is aware of any groups or individuals that meet periodically within ( or a short drive from ) Connecticut ? We aren't looking to bash the past ... just to connect with others who understand and move on .

    A little about us : Both raised as JWs . In for 35 plus years . Served as pioneers , as a ministerial servant and as an Elder . We Left around 8 years ago . Both of our entire extended families are still within the org. and so we have lost those connections . Like most , we had no friendships or connections with anyone outside of the congregation . So our leaving was life altering . Needless to say ... the road to making friends and connections has been slow and difficult .

    If anyone knows of groups that get together for support purposes ... please let us know .

    Thanks in advance

  • DesirousOfChange
    DesirousOfChange

    A member here (Flipper) organizes an "apostafest" annually at Lake Tahoe. Yeah, I know that's no where near CONN, but it isn't far by air. It has quite a few that attend. We made it last year and plan on doing so again this year.

    Doc

  • humbled
    humbled

    There was one that met in NYC earlier this year. A train ride away?

    The thread was up around ?March?

  • scratchme1010
    scratchme1010

    I was going to mention NYC too. There are always one or two popping up every now and then.

  • Sail Away
    Sail Away

    Mr. Sail Away and I live in CT. We are at anchor in St. Vincent right now and are celebrating our 40th anniversary sailing in the Grenedines. Would love to meet up with you when we get back to the States!

  • Still Totally ADD
    Still Totally ADD

    My wife and I live in Western NY near Jamestown. Maybe there is a half way point for us all to meet. Still Totally ADD

  • lrkr
    lrkr

    In the Hudson Valley. CT not too far.

  • Giordano
    Giordano

    Welcome to this forum Lonliwon and your very smart wife who knew deep down it was time to make an exit and a change...... congratulations to you both.

    My wife and I left some decades ago so we know something about making new friends.

    This is a big problem for many that leave without an alternative social non witness life already set up. One day you are 'loved' by hundreds the next day you are ignored by those same hundreds.

    Allow me to share one way to resolve this issue. As a JW you were accepted because you attended meetings regularly, had a lot in common with the friends...met weekly, shared a point of few, went out in the D to D service etc. And of course helped out with responsibilities within the congregation.

    You are already trained to enter the world of being a volunteer.

    Real friendships happen organically but you have to have a place where these very important relationships can be nourished.

    The good news is that you have many choices to pick from.

    In the non JW world volunteering is the preferred way to go. You are there because you want to render some of your experience and expertise to make this world just a little bit better. Or maybe just to be arround people you can respect.

    So here's how you get out of the lonely life style. You check out all of the volunteer organizations in your area and the ones that you find most interesting you contact by phone or in person.

    Neighborhoods, small towns and even large Cities........ depend on volunteers. The door is usually wide open.

    But, and this is the interesting thing, only the best people give up their time and skills to volunteer. Volunteer groups meet regularly so you get to know their names and have pleasant conversations before and after the meeting or task. You work on projects together.

    Google your town or city for volunteers. You will find a hundred different organizations from a free Clinic, the Humane Society, Hospice and other medical services, Sports groups of all sizes, lectures and discussion groups . We have a non profit group that run the local Drive in, the only one left within 200 miles.

    You do the same thing you did as a JW. You find a group of people who set aside their time freely. People you can agree with, who meet regularly (the key to getting to know someone) and who are always pleased to see you and willing to exchange a pleasant word or two. Among this group will be some very special people who will become your friends.

  • dogisgod
    dogisgod

    check out meetup.com. You could even start a group of your own.

  • lonliwon
    lonliwon

    Thanks everyone for the ideas .The suggestion to become involved on the local level through volunteerism ... Done that . Very rewarding .

    Yet, as great as our new found friends are ... there is still a disconnect within their ability to comprehend our explanation of just how difficult leaving our former religion has been . Some will say " i get it , I grew up Catholic or Protestant and my family was very upset when I left , or changed my religion . They gave me the cold shoulder for a while . But hang in there ... your family will come around and resume talking with you ". Yet within that same conversation they will divulge that their family really only attended religious services several times a year . Not really a fair and equal comparison . We have come to find that , although our friends with different backgrounds try to sincerely relate, the truth is that we grew up on essentially Different Planets ! ( As I stated : my wife and I both grew up as a JW and spent over 35 plus years in ) So that's why we figured that finding a few people to connect with who shared our background as well as our " escape" would be helpful .

    As far as starting and organizing a meetup group ... we will need to think about that one . LOL

    Thanks again everyone . Our search will continue :-)

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