Ok.. Trying to to think of humorous reasons to go back to meetings...
- because you're a Scrooge who doesn't wish to celebrate Christmas any longer
- because you really like hanging out with constipated, judgemental, pious, self-righteous, condescending, schmucks and trying to emulate them
- because you like holding a bible in your hand and feeling like (or "knowing!" 👀 that --) you have been granted special, secret, privileged, knowledge & wisdom from the Creator of the Universe himself!! - the Almighty, Holy, and Grand Jay-poo-bah...!!
- because somehow - it makes sense/ is reassuring? - to know that there are millions of invisible evil spirit beings watching your every move and who want to hurt you and kill you or tempt you and also want to do these same evil things to your family and loved ones... and that there are also millions of "good" spirit beings who do nothing really except stand around and watch you while they wring their hands and hope that you do the right thing, while apparently the only thing they "can" do is to maneuver you somehow into standing at someone's door to offer a tract or brochure.
- because gosh darn it, you really like the 1950's and all the values from that era and the 1920's and the 1880's too.... that whole vibe of masculine control combined with religious fervour (fever).....
And wearing important-looking special suits and ties and maybe hats and topcoats and debonair canes... And fancy box hats and gloves and pretty umbrellas (parasols?) for the ladies too...
Yes, a whole era of something appearing classy and worthy and having cookie-cutter perfection...
... An idea of utopia with values and ethics and morality gone horribly wrong....