I recently enjoyed reading another post on an ex-JW board about how our past experiences as Witnesses have shaped our lives and made us who we are. There is obvious truth to the effect that our past experiences do effect how we see our selves now, but I think many people who leave the Borg are still enslaved to the idea that they are the same person they were then. I disagree and think things are a little more complex than that.
For example, what we think of as "who we are" is really nothing more than a illusion or myth. In simple terms, we have a "story teller" function in our brains that assimilate our collected experiences in different circumstances to create a temporary homogenous conceptualization which we describe as “self.” Depending upon our state of awareness, altered or otherwise, this memetic and psychological weltanschauung can vary remarkably.
Besides the dynamics of various mental states to contend with, who we are also varies with nonzero competition between memeplexes. For example, when I was a Witness, my beliefs shaped not only my view of the world but of my very way of interacting with perceptual data. Consider how a male would look at a pornographic picture as a Witness and a picture of a horrible accident scene, compared to someone who later left the Witnesses. I contend there is a big difference both by reason of scientific experiments and my own personal experiences.
In college, I remember reading about an interesting psychology experiment in which an electrode was attached to a single muscle neuron on a person’s finger. The output of the electrode went to a computer, which altered the flicker rate of a television monitor in front of the subject. When the finger neuron fired, it would cause the flicker rate to slow down, and make the television image stable and visible. When neutral images were shown on the monitor, the neuronal firing was sufficient enough to stabilize images for a few seconds before habituation set in. Interestingly, when pornographic pictures were shown to male subjects, the rate of neuronal firing was very high, allowing for detailed and prolonged viewing of the images. When the images were of horrible accident sequences, the neuron rate practically fell to nothing. Which brings up several questions…how could part of the brain monitor what information it wanted to receive? If the flicker rate was so fast on the monitors to make the images unintelligible, how did the finger neuron know not to fire? I came to the conclusion that our conscious experience of reality is exceedingly small, that indeed the information we actually process and allow ourselves to see is related to our beliefs and interests, our memeplex or comprehensive view of reality.
Using the same materials, I know when I was a Witness that images of naked women had both a powerful emotional appeal (as I was single with no sexual opportunities being available) but also one of great guilt (for displeasing the JW God). When I did get to occasionally see those images, I saw them not only in richer detail then but the experience of who I was doing that event was much different than 20 some years later being outside the JW mental trip. Now, pornography, at least the type I saw back then, not only has very limited emotional activation but the physical way I see it is much like reading a sentence. Good speed-readers don’t see every word in a sentence; they skim, scan, and select topic words that combine to form meaning. In short, the picture gets a second or two of my attention as it has little value.
As our current beliefs (memeplexes) change they also tend to force fit old memories to bend into compliance with the current reigning memeplexes. If we now love spiders for instance, our old childhood negative experiences will be modified and minimized.
All this says we are who we are for the moment. The smaller the details of our past memories, the easier they fade away to be replaced by new ways of looking at the world and being new people. We pretend we are the same people, but we are not. Half our behavior comes from our genes, and while different genes express themselves at different times in your life, your behavioral influences are rather stable. This only adds to the illusion of you being you through time.
You are not the You of yesteryear…got that? Lol
Skipper