If your still-JW parent died...

by starfish422 50 Replies latest jw experiences

  • Thirdson
    Thirdson

    I would attend even if one parent didn't want me there. This issue came up a few years ago when my mother told one xJW sibling that she didn't want me and another sibling told if anything happended to her or dad. My sibling refused to go along with the request and said we had a right to know and besides, funerals are for the living not the dead.

    I make sure that I can travel at short notice and have funds to get a flight if necessary AND assuming I am told in time. I hope it won't be for a long time...but you never know.

    Thirdson

  • starfish422
    starfish422
    What kind of question is this? How could you not attend the funeral of your parents??!!!!

    It's a valid question that has troubled me for sometime. Obviously your parents have *not* disowned you, little one, or else you would understand how I (and, apparently, many others) could struggle with this decision.

  • moana
    moana

    I long for the day.....then I can be finally rid of the pain she has caused me. The only problem is she will probably never go. At 79 - it doesn't appear she is slowing down much.

    All I want is to collect my inheritance (if there is one) and even that may bring up the memories of the cult. Although I don't think I would have any problem having cash.

    peace

  • Phantom Stranger
    Phantom Stranger

    Dad died, I went to support Mom. Since I am faded and live far away, no issues resulted. Non-JW aunt was disappointed in the amount of built-in Witnessing in the talk, but I was actually surprised - the brother had been a friend of my dad's, and did a good job - better than I would have ever expected, and minimized the preaching relative to others I have heard.

  • ColdRedRain
    ColdRedRain

    I just have one warning to people if they do go to their JW parent's funeral. Expect to be "preached" to and you better have some damn good answers that make them think.

    I had to go through that a month and a half ago, and boy, did I make alot of people think.

    And yes, I do agree with 3rdson. You should attend no matter what. I had half a mind on skipping the funeral so I could dodge the barrage of "Are you apostate"'s and "You know, you're not going to get a ressurection for what you said"'s (Makes me laugh every time I hear it.) Turns out, I was making the biggest mistake of my life, so I rushed to the kingdumb hall and when the elder buisnessman gave the eulogy marketing pitch about his hope in a ressurection how he got suckered into a family-splitting cult, I just walked away.

  • blondie
    blondie

    My father is a JW lying, unrepentant child molester. I won't be attending his funeral (nor will 75% of my family)

    My mother's I will go to just to irritate my hypocritical siblings.

    Blondie

    PS I know it sounds cold, but I figure family doings are best done to celebrate the living.

  • Sassy
    Sassy

    wow. I hadn't thought about this. If my mom died, boy, practively everyone in the whole circuit knows me, knows my mom. Because I moved away, most don't know I chose to stop but my closest friend back home does. If I came, no doubt she has already told a number of mutual friends and they would all have their noses up to me. hmm.. Well I guess I would go any way. I'd just sit next to my dfd sister. We'd give each other strength.

  • morty
    morty

    mom and dad are both out now,but nana and papa are still there......I would attend for either one of them...they would both want me there,and I sure the hell would not let any dubs stand in my way....The dubbs gave up on me years ago,so they dont bother with me anymore...which suits me just fine............

    morts

  • doodle-v
    doodle-v

    Of course i would i attend, i love my parents no matter how i feel about jw teachings. I would attend their funeral in a KH or any church for that matter. The part that would get to me is the "friends" coming up to me to hug me and say how sorry they are, and then say, "oh you should come back to the meeting, you'll really be encouraged, yadda yadda we've missed you blah blah blah then you'll get to see them in paradise, blah blah"

    My parents are devout hard core jw so no doubt one of the JW elders would want to have a dinner at his house for my parents, so of course I would feel like an ass if i dont go so then i'll be stuck with a bunch of j dubs blabbing about how wonderful it is that they have the promise of paradise on earth.

    Doodle-V

  • run dont walk
    run dont walk

    oh yes, i have thought about this alot !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    I have decided that when they pass on, which will be soon i guess (in their 70's), I will NOT attend any service at the Kingdom Hall, I do not beleive in it, so why would I go, I will attend the funeral service at the the funeral home, I will go to the grave site, but there is no way I will step foot in the Kingdom Hall. That's just me !

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