Word from the platform...?

ESTEE

It's not easy trying to be a borg member...

And the transition to living in the real world is not an easy journey either ...

Soooo ... really ... it is all about choice ... because the transition to living is do-able!!!

Earlier this week MonkeyPrincess wrote about talking to her mom about conditional and unconditional love...

she responded with "i love all you girls too, but not unconditionally".

Is this really what dubs are taught...? That their love for us is conditional...? I'm just wondering if that is really something spewed from the platform ...?

'Cuz I'm a shunned mom. My daughter and son have that conditional kinda shunning love for me...

Now ...I gotta know ... Who has heard talks about conditional love for disfellowshipped and disassociated ones ...? Who would help me with this question ...?

ESTEE

SanFranciscoJim

Is this really what dubs are taught...? That their love for us is conditional...? I'm just wondering if that is really something spewed from the platform ...?

Any religion that teaches: "We will love you, if.....

* You attend 5 meetings per week

* You go out in field service regularly

* You adhere to a strict dress code

* You shun apostates and the disfellowshipped

* You do not interfere in the affairs of the body of elders, even if that means a pedophile goes unpunished

.....is practicing conditional love.

Unconditional love is just what the word means: love without conditions. This has never been taught by the JWs.

cruzanheart

Exactly. I remember Mom telling everyone who would listen that when she was pregnant she said and felt that if her child wasn't going to grow up to be a JW, it might as well be born dead.

And this year the kids are going trick-or-treating, and Jennie's celebrating her birthday, and I'm celebrating MY birthday, and we're having a Christmas tree, so nyah, nyah, nyah!

Nina

shamus

It is a sickening trait in Jehovahs Witnesses. Very sickening indeed.

I think that they show themselves as having "no natural affection",,, yet another prophecy in the Bible that says that in the last days, people would have no natural affection for each other.

Not that I believe that we are in the last days, but what a perfect way to describe someone who loves conditionally. As SFJ pointed out, it's always "IF"...

I think that you should just let your kids be, and if they ever come to their senses, good for them. Your job is to be the best person that you can be... live your life as you want to live it... happily, kindly, and without prejudice. These are true traits of a normal human being... not one that has conditions to everything.

I am sorry that your kids don't talk to you. That is crap.

ESTEE

Sooooooooooooo ...?

Has anyone heard this expression from the platform ...?

ESTEE

outnfree

Nope. Never heard the phrase "conditional love" from the platform.

But it was certainly taught as Jim explained above. To summarize: IF you're not marching in lock step with Jehovah's organization, you don't deserve to be loved.

This is one of the things that made me want to leave, too. My oldest was NOT doing things "Jehovah's way" and I absolutely HATED trying to control her with guilt trips. It was not the loving thing to do. She had genuine objections and was reacting according to her own conscience. How could I not love her for that?

((((((Estee)))))))) I sincerely hope your kids DO come around!

out

garybuss

Estee, The Witnesses who were of the rigid and conditional type that I knew were referred to as "theocratic", and that term was used during about every meeting I was ever at. I'm not thinking they used the term conditional, that would be too open and honest, but they described conditional at many meetings when they discussed approved association. They used a scripture over and over about bad associations spoiling useful habits. I assume those useful habits had something to do with religious literature sales or new member recruitment . . . and bad associations were most likely people who did not support those activities.

dannyboy

Hi Estee,

I agree with the good points others have posted, Witnesses would never be encouraged from the platform to display "conditional love", but that is the path they're teaching.

Like so many concepts that Witnesses become indoctrinated with, "loaded language" is used to convey a course that would otherwise raise questions in a normal, thinking person. The "theocratic" thing to do or say gets around all sorts of obstacles, like kindness, love, family ties, common sense, and clear thinking.

You may remember that we have in common our offspring shunning us for no reasonable cause.

So please accept a hug from me, ((((( Estee ))))), and a sincere wish that things with them will change for you for the better.

---Dan

Special K

Hi Estee..

Sorry for the situation this "DARN" religion has you in . with your daughter shunning you..

I live on the Atlantic coast and my problem in reverse.. my mother shuns me...

Maybe we need to live in the middle of Canada to make any difference..WHO KNOWS?

Growing up in the dubs...I don't remember the term conditional love being used although that is what the great majority of J.W.'s practice.

I do feel that the J.W.'s have a "loaded language" as one poster put it...and I did hear many times the use of that scripture about ones having "no natural affection"..and that pretty well describes it.

When a parent and child cannot show a natural affection to one another....well,, that is just sick and unnatural.

sad estee.. very sad indeed.. (((Estee)))

sincerely

Special k

onacruse

Well, well...an interesting question, and it prompted me to do a search:

The only 2 times the term "unconditional love" occurs on the 2001 WTS CD:

*** g92 5/22 pp. 11-12 Help for Adult Children of Alcoholics ***
"My father?s behavior was so shameful that his shame rubbed off on me. To compensate I tried to be perfect. I gave and gave, trying to buy love, never feeling worthy of unconditional love. My life became a performance, with feelings frozen. Years later my husband and children told me I was a robot, mechanical. For 30 years I had slaved for them, sacrificed my emotional needs for theirs, given to them as I had always given to my parents. And this was my thanks? It was the ultimate wound!

*** g82 3/22 p. 24 Psychiatry Goes to the Dogs ***
Dr. Calabro explains: "Dogs give love?unconditional love. They ask for attention, and when someone responds, they give love and security and warmth in return, with no strings attached."

There are no occurrences of "conditional love," though it's obvious that that's the primary kind shown in the WTS.

I guess that means that JWs can only expect to get unconditional love from dogs.

Craig

Word from the platform...?

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