The Evil Apostate Fan Club
What if there were such a thing? What would it be like?
{cue daydream sequence and music}
Boys and girls of all ages, now you can join the Evil Apostate Fan Club. Be an evil apostate in your spare time. Warn your friends and neighbors when JWs come to your neighborhood. Instantly see through their flawed logic and circular arguments. Become immune to cult mind control.
Membership includes:
Membership card -- Good for free hugs at any any Apostafest and instantly qualifies you for the Do Not Call list
Decoder Ring -- Encrypts your secret apostate messages and makes them JW proof
Pocket Calendar -- Good for all dates except 1872, 1874, 1878, 1914, 1918, 1925, 1941, 1975
Little Black Book of Contacts -- Replaces publisher's field service notebook
Secret Whistle -- Good for alerting neighbors to JWs in the neighborhood, but impossible to play any Kingdom Melody on it
Choice of T-Shirt -- Apostate Slut, Apostate Menace, Apostate Vixen, District Overbeer, Dub Girls Gone Wild, Door to Door No More, Apostate Hottie, Smurf Worshiper
Choice of Bumper Sticker -- I'm in the Jehovah's Witness Protection Program, I Brake for Apostafests, Jehovah's Witness Escapee, Borg Free
Okay, anything else? Any other T-Shirt or bumper sticker slogans? Who would you nominate as the club officers? Any ideas for a logo?
Tammy
