by jazbug 39 Replies latest jw friends
THESE new rulles have been in place since the nov 15 1988 wt-
IS YOUR HOME A PLACE OF REST- something like that
the problem has always been a THE APPLICATION BY THE LOCAL ELDERS/CO is why wt membvers get different advice
but what can one expect from CHEESE AND CRACKER MEN
as they say YOU GET WHAT YOU PAY FOR
that spiritual endangerment crap was used by my ex-wife, to get a divorce. glad I'm no longer married to the watchtowers rules. Seems to me that the watchtower breaks up many more families than it saves.
I think that my ex must have used the spiritual endangerment garbage also. I will never know for sure. This does not surprise me. Did anybody get a straight answer from the Gestapo, Stalin, Mussolini, etc?
Even though I was never a Jayho, never once stopped her from going to meetings, she had no problem getting a divorce. She has since married a Jayho with what appears to be heresay fornication. I tried to get some answers from her elders but they always claimed that they were in the dark about the details. (this is a simple feat for them. All they have to do is act naturely.)
Nothing! absolutely nothing, that this CULT does surprises me anymore!
68storm
Yup, a friend of mine whose spouse found their stash of apostate materials, was left by their spouse on the basis that the spouse's spirituality was endangered by remaining in the same household with the apostate. Rather than staying and trying to help the spouse work through any crisis they may be going through. Fine Christian love, that.
If one in a married coupel, is unfaithfull, can this be keept in secret , so the fathfull part never will now, even if this is in a commite?Or will the commite tell the it to the other part?
If the say to the sinner you must tell your wife and he dont what happend then?
What decide when someone can bee free too marrie again, where is the line fore this?
Like kissing tuching brests and things like that.
Do we have an statu-barred time like we have in the wordly laws?
Like if I have done something 35 years ago, it is no punishment after so long time, even if I dont tell it myself?
Some qestion to the elders on the bord, or perhps some howhave expiriens about this.
There aren't any divorce rules...the elders take a side in a separation, play one against the other and blame the other and try to find a way to DF him/her (if they haven't yet). The congregation takes the hint and gives a defacto dissfellowshipping in the meantime.
I played by the rules...that's why I'm still in...If I had met this board during the separation, my fade would have been easier because no one was talking to me. Then my ex was caught sleeping around, I was vindicated (according to their way, too) and my "friends" came out again in the fair weather. That #$@+ even messed up my fade...
I had kicked my soon to be ex out and the elders said I had no choice but to take him back. I had done my research and found that on the grounds of health, one could leave their spouse. They said as long as he wasn't beating me, I had no grounds. Didn't matter that he told me that I deserved to have my fingers broken or that he had threatened to kill others in the past for less than he said I was doing to him. He would use mind games to threaten and degrade me and make me feel like I should be dead or beaten, but he said he is a christian now so he couldn't do it, he just wanted me to know what I deserved, OVER and OVER. Yeah, christians treat people like they should be beaten. So emotionally he was killing my spirit and on two occasions it was all I could do not to take a bottle of pills just to rid myself of him. Then when he broke into my email and read correspondence between me and a close friend and then totally lost it because he felt she was trying to break us up, he sent horrid emails to me saying he thought I should know that when he was walking beside me he felt like he was walking next to a prostitute and claims he was sure I was fornicating with all kinds of men. Which I wasn't. I was so mad when I read those, it was the last straw. I went home and while he was out, changed the locks. I had had it. And like I said, the elders made me take him back. They put him in a house with a family in the cong (man had no job, or ability yet since he did not have a grn card) and they told that family I would take him back the next day. That was a lie! They never even told me they told them that, or asked them to take him in. So the next day they come looking for me and all down my throat about what was going on. I never asked them to become involved and yet I am in trouble because this man is burdening them and because the elders said I had to take him back, I was supposed to. Well in the end I did, because I hated someone else was being burdened. Looking back now though I sure am sorry I ever did. I am so angry yet about how the elders handled everything and that was why I chose not to go back. They didnt' care that this man could have pushed me over the edge. He didn't fit in their little guidelines of what is allowed and what is not. I was supposed to take on the weight of the whole thing and play nice since according to 'their rules' there were no grounds for a divorce.
Rules rules rules.. I am so done..
and he can have his grounds. I could care less. but they can figure it out on their own. I'm not going back or writing a letter to make it all easy for them. If I chose not to play, why do I have to ease my conscience or make their life easier. I don't feel bad about what I am doing in my life right now so why apologise. They have to do what they have to do, and so do I.
I choose to live my life for the first time in my life. (yes.. this subject does raise my blood pressure).. but its ok.. like I said.. this whole situation opened my eyes and I really needed that. I just wish I had been able to see years ago.
"but they can figure it out on their own. I'm not going back or writing a letter to make it all easy for them. If I chose not to play, why do I have to ease my conscience or make their life easier. I don't feel bad about what I am doing in my life right now so why apologise. They have to do what they have to do, and so do I."
sns, so many here on the board feel that way. For that reason, even when called to a JC meeting, they decide not to bother to go. But you also plan on moving and changing your phone number which should prove easier for you altogether.
I am so sorry for all of you who have had horrible experiences with your spouses... OMG... It just makes me sick and breaks my heart to hear your stories. My story on the borg pales in comparison... just one more reason why we need to speak out against this horrible organization.
Good for all of you for taking your stand!
Like kissing tuching brests and things like that
IN ELDERS SCHOOL we spent 45 min discussing the difference between CARESSING THE BREAST AND MOMENTARYLY TOUCHING THE BREAST
they carry different punishment- smile
