Has being a Witness caused clinical Depression with any of you?

Singing Man

For me I would say that half the reason I am depressed is directly cause from being raised a witness, I am 50 now.

flower

I lived with major depression for much of my life as a witness. Starting around age 5 and pretty much ending after I read Crisis of Conscience.

Most of it was caused, in my opinion, by guilt. I wasn't able to get myself to 'do more' theocratically and thought Jehovah hated me for it. Therefore I hated myself for it from a very young age.

I hated myself for many many reasons but mainly it was because I didnt WANT to do what Jehovah wanted/demanded of us. The fact that I didnt WANT to and I was just going through the motions made me think I MUST truly be evil and wicked. After all the society said we were supposed to love Jehovah and WANT to do his will. I wanted to do other things besides study, meetings, service. I was evil.

My major depression led to a suicide attempt at 16, another in my early twenties. After I was DF'd I was REALLY depressed because I KNEW Jehovah hated me since he threw me out. At that point, for a brief period I really did WANT to do what he wanted. And for that he threw me out. I lost it pretty much and went through a mental breakdown I guess you could say. I spent a brief week in a 'nice comfy hospital' ;). Went through hell..and came out still depressed and not planning on waiting until Armageddon for Jehovah to kill me.

Then I found out the truth ......

Enishi

I wouldn't have called myself clinically depressed, but for some time after my baptism I felt utterly miserable, and didn't even understand why. I felt like everything was pointless, if I could I would have blown up the planet. A couple times I did even consider suicide.

I started to feel a little better eventually, but still went through bouts of depression since I couldn't accept the teaching that God was going to destroy 99% of population, just because they didn't have the right beleifs.

stillajwexelder

Not exactly --long time ago now in the late 80s but my doctor said it was (being a witness) not the exact cause but a major contibutory factor -- been great for a number of years now -- the reason , I never took anything as serious as just before and just after baptism. I even accepted the assignment of being an elder whilst being more --"laid -back" about the WTBTS. It helped me become more balanced so there was less risk of me lapsing back into clinical depression. (I still sat in judgement on people though ) Now of course as I hardly go to any meetings I feel really great.

gumby

For me I would say that half the reason I am depressed is directly cause from being raised a witness, I am 50 now.

Well....I'm 49 and I would agree with you on this. I'm not sure I would EVER be depressed had I NOT been raised a witness. We will never know. I was in the Organisation up to my neck and not just a seat warmer as some call it. To not be able to think and decide for yourself........without your faith leading you ........ takes away some identity in people. I never learned to think for myself in many ways and had to relearn many things. I also as one poster mention.........after learning the truth about the truth, did not have the same depression I had as a dub. Now I've got SAD...............yippy! ( seasonal effective disorder) Gumby

metatron

Read up on Cognitive Therapy. Depression may be a habit of thinking ( "Feeling Good" by Beck)

Now what about Witness thinking might cause depression?

Believing that everyone but Witnesses will be killed by God

Thinking that all art, entertainment, philosophy and goverance is directed by Satan the Devil

Waiting decades of your life for a paradise that never arrives

Accepting that the overwhelming majority of young Witnesses are lost and damned because "they've left the truth"

Add your own observations about meetings and field service here

Depression - often untreated and undiagnosed - is nearly an epidemic among Witnesses.

The Awake has stopped publishing so many articles on it because the problem has become an embarrassment

for the organization. The current thought is to simply deny it and , in effect, command Witnesses to be happy

("Jehovah's Witnesses are the happiest people on earth")

Get "Feeling Good" and investigate Cognitive Therapy, You'll feel better if you do what the book says.

metatron

Sunnygal41

I think Metatron pretty much covered it very very well!! I would say that is it in a nutshell!

Yes, I spent most of my life depressed because of the insane teachings and paranoia that everything is bad bad bad, and I also have to say that what Flower wrote about feeling guilty because I didn't want to be one was a major contributor. I have no feelings of guilt for having left, even tho I still have a mom and a sister in. I feel filled with spiritual love and joy these days, knowing that Spirit loves me for just who I am, and I am free of the "Truth".............

Terri

JamesThomas

Indeed, being a Witness can rip your heart and soul to threads -- the result: deep depression. We innately want to love and care for others and are attracted to openness, friendliness and kindness. Yet, as a Witnesses our cornerstone, our foundation of reality is based on loving and obeying a god who will kill us if we don't. It's humanely impossible to truly and honestly love that which threatens to kill you. That, which goes against the very nature of love. Religious beliefs often run very, very deep. They feed our entire sense of who we are and our relation to the universe. They are a lens through which we view the entire world. Is it any wonder we are broken and confused having at one time embraced and built our lives upon such a repugnant and vile image of what should be the acme of love and perfection? What surprises me is that we are not all locked up. j

Sassy

being a witness caused me to try to take my life a few years ago. Too much stress and when I 'fell short' and got into just a "little" trouble with a 'brother' and a "FRIEND" ran to the elders to tattle on me, I couldn't handle it all and took a bottle of pills and a bottle of whiskey. It's so ironic looking back because I hadn't really even done anything with him but she was claiming I had and to face the elders and the stress was more than I could take. Then when I didn't end up dying but only slept for two days by a miracle, I figured I was in trouble now and should have been dead so I really did go out and get into real trouble (or fun depending on how you look at it). But since I wasn't ready to leave the JW life then, I felt so guilty that I kept thinking I still needed to take pills and do it right this time. I ended up in therapy eventually which helped me out.

nobody told me

Depression can be caused by many factors. If a person has suffered for more than two weeks they should seek professional help (not the elders, because they are not professionals, and can do much harm)

For me personally, being a Witness did add to my bouts of depression. Before being a dub, no depression, during 3 bouts in 19 years, out of the dubs feeling much better.

I can not say if in those 19 years of being a dub, I wouldn't have had a bout of depression, but I will say the help these people give for depression is ZERO. Linking depression to what a person can or can not do for God(the borg.), is criminal. Their head is up their ass on this one, they have no training whatsoever to deal with depression and should direct people to those with training in the matter. I can not think of anything worse that these people can do than to dissfellowship a depressed person and cut them off from their families.

There is one thing worse, hide child abuse to keep the organization looking good

Has being a Witness caused clinical Depression with any of you?

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