I just had my first "annual" visit since leaving over 3 years ago. Someone in my family told me elder so and so stopped to see me. So I knew they were on my trail. Then I stopped home quickly one day and one of the elders that was assigned was working that exact area and so made his call. It was brief and I said I am not interested in returning. The elder (a former best friend and fellow elder) was very polite, not snippy or condescending. I appreciated that. I just wonder what other experiences are out there when and if you got your "annual" visit.
Them annual visits
by tazmaniac 11 Replies latest jw friends
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City Fan
I had a visit by an elder a few months ago, even though it's been nearly a decade since I left.
I thought 'what the hell' and invited him in. He was really nice though and talked about his family, my family and others I'd not seen in years. After about 20 minutes or so he said something strange. He said "I really should be encouraging you to come back to the hall but I'm not going to".
After that he talked about how no-one really cared for older people at the hall these days or visited them like they used to. He said 30 years or so ago the witnesses looked after each other more.
He stayed for about an hour after which I wondered who was meant to be encouraging who!
And that was it.
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ozziepost
After that he talked about how no-one really cared for older people at the hall these days or visited them like they used to. He said 30 years or so ago the witnesses looked after each other more.
I think this view is quite widespread.....worldwide too.
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Stacy Smith
City Fan we may see that elder posting here one day. Who knows.
My parents DA two years ago, no visits yet and none expected. But because my parents are so friendly towards witnesses out in public there has been a local needs talk at the hall about them. So they know the elders really consider them serious apostates. It's good they feel that way so that others can see the elders are full of crap.
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cruzanheart
No visits for me -- I guess I did the perfect fade! Big Tex's idea: we moved our cards to a different congregation, told the P.O. when he called that we'd get assigned to a book study at our very next meeting, and then just never showed up. After two half-hearted phone calls from the secretary of the congregation, there's been . . . nothing! That congregations did a great job of ignoring me the last time I was in it, about six years ago, and I was even attending meetings then, so I'm glad to see that they are consistent.
Nina
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willyloman
Nina's comment reflects the fact that increasingly the elders are adopting the view that people who fade away are "not my problem." These guys already have enough to do and are not looking for ways to spend another night or part of a weekend chasing down people who just aren't interested. This view changes, temporarily, when the CO visits and chews out the elders for not keeping track of the flock; afterwards, there will be a flurry of phone calls and a few half-hearted visits, but within a few weeks things return to normal. If you're fading, "normal" is good; if you are downtrodden and in need of assistance from the spiritual shepherds, well... good luck.
It's much easier for elders to ignore people when they are "move-ins." That's why nina and tex found it easy to fade away after they switched congos. Out of sight, out of mind is a working concept when yours is an unfamiliar face.
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rocketman
Nina, you mentioned a good method - sometimes, moving to a new congregation, but then not showing, is a good way to fade. They don't really know you, and the elders that did know you naturally just assume that you're being taken care of in the new congregation.
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sunshineToo
My parents DA two years ago, no visits yet and none expected. But because my parents are so friendly towards witnesses out in public there has been a local needs talk at the hall about them. So they know the elders really consider them serious apostates.
This almost sounds too funny. Well, I'd better be super nice to the them, too.
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Poztate
I expect that sooner or later those nice little annual visits will turn nasty.I think a few years down the line they will have instructions from head office to DA anyone who doesn't want to come back.It won't matter if you are stirring up a fus or just want to be quietly left alone.You will be booted out.This will help to tidy up their book work and put a final closure to you, want it or not.
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SLOAN
NO one has ever bother to visit me!! hehe Guess they know I'm a lost cause!!