What One Thing Hurt You The Most...

by shamus 12 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  shamus

  About the witnesses. I mean, what was the worst thing that happened that eventually drove you out of the "truth". What person hurt you the most, and made you just sick.

  I know that it has happened to each and every board member here. For me?

  I knew that the "Love" that was being felt was conditional. The only ppl that I really trusted were my friends. We always had a good time together... well, that came to an end.

  One person was a total ass in my group of friends. I chose not to hang out with him. The result? They all shunned me! All of my friends treated me like I was disfellowshipped. They even went so far as to tell me that. Then they're like "oh, we can talk about it later, want to come over?"

  I never did again. They were my last stand in the "truth" and they hurt me like you cannot believe. It hurt, but I felt as if it was enough. I had had enough of these friends in the congregation. I went out and actively seeked "worldly" assosiation. I was in the troof for several more years, but those ppl I never forgave. I was and still am not "friends" with them. They were real backstabbers.

  Which one thing hurt you about the truth, or did a witness do to you that made your heart feel as if it was going to burst?

  (hey, I'm way over that stuff, so no whiney huggies for me, mkay? )
• 

  Prisca

  LOL, I was about to give you a (((hug))), hehe...

  I think one of the first things that helped open my eyes to the "truth" was the conditional love too. Not just to myself, but others who were deemed "less spiritual" than others. I was in a really cliquey congregation, so it was pretty obvious who was "in" and who was "out".

  I saw through all that hypocrisy, so I stayed on the outer, and hung out with whomever I wanted, and thus I was deemed "less spiritual" too!!
• 

  Scully

  I was struggling to hang on to The Truth? at the time. It was April 1996. My best JW friend invited me out for coffee and dessert, supposedly with the motive to cheer me up and help me.

  After listening to me vent about the lack of love I had observed, particularly while I was suffering from postpartum depression, I told her that I thought I needed a "vacation" from The Truth? so I could figure things out. I can still hear her saying:

  If you turn your back on The Truth?, your three beautiful children will be better off if you take them out in the back yard and blow their heads off with a gun. That way they'll have a resurrection and they won't go down with you at Armageddon?.

  I just stood up and walked away, and never spoke to her again.

  Love, Scully
• 

  Undecided

  I couldn't live up to all the rules and requirements to be a good JW, even though I was a PO I didn't quite follow the line. So I figured if every one else was like me it was all a sham anyway and I didn't want to put out the effort to stay in there and follow the old men at Brooklyn, so I bolted away. Later I learned that all the Jehovah quided truth wasn't produced by him at all but was thought up by the old guys at Brooklyn and voted on to get a 2/3 majority to make it new light, which made the former new light, old light, and if we waited on Jehovah to fix all the old light we would die of old age while they were trying to decide when the end was comming. "Soon" became an expression meaning years,decades, then centuries.

  So I guess I will die a free man from all the Russell inspired crap.

  Ken P.
• 

  HadEnuf

  Marking my son for marrying an "unbeliever" (unbaptized publisher raised in the JW's studying for baptism)...and not even warning him and then giving the talk two days before the wedding and then boycotting the wedding and urging the congregation (and the other congregation sharing our hall) to do the same. In the marking talk the elder said that my son had been warned, when if fact he hadn't. We got it on tape...the slander. We took it to the CO, the DO...the big guys in NY...and they denied any wrongdoing. What a load of CRAP! So it was SO LONG SUCKERS! Cathy L.

  P.S. We haven't been to meetings for about four years and not one phone call or letter from any of our loving brothers and sisters. Go figure. Good riddance.
• 

  frenchbabyface

  
  I guess the really (not the very) first time I've questionning myself about the truth ... I already knew that JW's was not happy / but I was thinking it was because of the organisation not about the beliefs ...

  That was when IRINA a Sister suicided ... A JW mother who have already lost a son won't choose to suicide herself ... without saying a word to the people she loved, about why ...

  It took me more than 10 years to realised that maybe (cause I still don't know) maybe it was because she realised that in being JW she screw her son's little life and didn't share what she could have shared with him before he died (cause he was against the JW's and died in a car accident he was driving a day he was made about his parents) ! ... Maybe in knowing the truth about the truth she just couldn't take it ! ... and also couldn't talk about it (In knowing that she wasn't able to handle it herself - to protect her husband and daughter - as much as she could in this circomstances) ... I don't know ...

  But that was a BIG STEP in my reasoning about : WHAT IT IS ALL ABOUT EXACTLY ? ...
• 

  missylissy

  If you turn your back on The Truth?, your three beautiful children will be better off if you take them out in the back yard and blow their heads off with a gun. That way they'll have a resurrection and they won't go down with you at Armageddon?.

  *gasp*

  i was never a jw, so i dont really understand a lot of stuff i read on here. this i understand....but i couldnt ever imagine hearing someone say that. or saying it to someone else. its' awful. it makes me feel like im gonna throw up.

  sorry guys, that you guys has to go through these things. (hugs) from missy
• 

  shamus

  Yes, that is a common thing that is insinuated. That you're gonna roast at armageddon.

  I wonder what a prosecutor would say if he/she heard the above statement. Probably complete horror!

  People who talk like that should be put in a mental institution. They obviously do not have the necessary life skills to be out in public. Those are the kind of ppl that blow people away.
• 

  Piph

  With me, it wasn't one person per se. Although I've had my share of mistreatment by a particular elder or two, I was all for the "not turning your back on Jehovah just 'cause his servants are imperfect" thing. For the most part, though, the JWs I grew up around were genuinely caring.

  What did it for me was reading a book that mentioned common symptoms of cult victims, and wondering why I fit so many of the symptoms. Then I realized they were all JW teachings. Then I realized I had grown up in a cult. It scared me to death.
• 

  Sassy

  What hurt me the most by a JW or the org? When my husband (2nd) who STILL claims he was a lover of God, a Christian in good conscience, lied to me. He told me he loved me, told me he wanted a life with me, told me he could have sex, told me tons of lies in the persona of the person he was pretending to be so I would marry him and he could stay in this country. But the minute the wedding was over, the truth came out, although not all of it immediately. The fact that this man could lie about everything in his life and the elders, this organization supported him hurts me, angers me and that is why I left.

  Although that was the straw that broke the camels back. I was also extremely hurt when I had attempted suicide two years ago and JW friends were not there for me. People who were supposed to be the ones who loved me the most were only angry and would barely talk to me. It had not been a cry for help, since it truly was meant to be a final act by my hand, but there is nothing like waking up and finding out that people you would have expected to shake you and tell you how much they love you and need you and DON"T go doing that again.... didn't at all.. they shunned you for a while.. that hurt..

  AND one of those people, now that I left JWs actually told me I should go blow my head off.. slit my wrists, take my own life the right way this time.........that hurt