Just lost our parents....

by 2escaped lifers 48 Replies latest jw friends

  • Satanus
    Satanus

    Lifers

    I too went through that w my mother, two sisters, and brother. After a few yrs, i decided 'to hell w them'. I cut them off. What right does your family have to treat you like a piece of dirt? NONE, that's what!

    Of course, that is my view, and it might not work for you, if you have strong ties. But still, you aren't under obligation to let you heart bleed continuously for yrs. You have no obligation to those people. You are free, now, to carry on w your life as you please. Find new friends, new places to go, new things to do that you really like.

    Just some thoughts

    SS

  • Lost Diamond
    Lost Diamond

    I am so very sorry. It just tears me up to hear how that organization has torn families apart.....mine included. Don't ever stop showing them your love....maybe that may someday break the walls that are stacked high between you and your parents.

  • gumby
    gumby

    Hi Brandon,

    It's un-human isn't it? Having your family do this to you is like a wife having her husband coming home from work and saying......".I don't care for your ways anymore, and I want nothing more to do with you ever again". The hurt can run very deep. It's also not something you can put behind you and forget about either . It's a shame that religions like this can exist and destroy like they do......and get away with it.

    I think you will find this place to be a haven for you as you go through this as there are hundreds dealing with the same situation here. Hang tough............oh.......and welcome to the board!

    Gumby

  • moonwillow
    moonwillow

    (((Brandon and Family)))

    For the life of me I can't understand how parents can do this to their own flesh and blood. Mind control is such a powerful tool. Sorry you and your family have to go through this.

  • garybuss
    garybuss



    Sorry it all seems so real. I have been to that door many times over the years.

    After the pain gets better, I hope you make a huge project of educating your children of the truth and the reality of it all and get them some rational exit counseling so they to not do what my sons did and return to Witnessism and shunning us as adults. I hope you protect them from contact with those who would infect them and I hope you never bargain with a Witness where your children are concerned.

    The reason children and grandparents get along so well is they have a common enemy. Be ready and don't let it happen. I have had to shun the shunners and they are NOT welcome in my home. I blame them for all the shunning and hatred in my family. They are evil and they must be kept away. Don't be foolish like me. GaryB



  • JamesThomas
    JamesThomas

    alt Brandon and Family, These are some of the hardest posts of all to read on this board. It is a spear through an already wounded heart for many of us. Yet, that is one of the most beautiful things about this board. Nowhere else -- that I know of -- will you find so much genuine understanding, compassion and support. You are not alone. You will make many friends here who will love you and accept you for who you are, rather than what you believe. When we are true to ourselves, life has a way of blooming. I am glad you are here, and glad you share your story with us. j

  • myself
    myself

    (((((((((((Brandon & Family)))))))))

    It is amazing how they feel the need for total control, and then blame you despite the fact that they are deciding to shun the family.It is sad because the control comes from a man made cult who uses fear instead of love to keep their members.

    Karla

  • Dansk
    Dansk

    Hi Brandon & Family,

    First of all WELCOME to REAL friends!!

    If you have the time, please go here: http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/9/47295/668014/post.ashx#668014

    That's my story - which is similar to yours, but in reverse. My two daughters, along with all our old so-called "friends", are shunning my wife, two sons and I. Previously we were considered the 'model' JW family and were chosen to do all the family items about how a JW family should be --------- then I found out the truth!

    My wife and I have been through the whole gamut of emotions, but our friends here have helped us heal - COMPLETELY!

    When we first came here we were in agonising pain. We felt as though we were in mourning; that we had lost something special - which is exactly what Watchtower wants you to feel. The truth is, you/we haven't lost anything at all. It is your parents, other relatives and friends that have lost the greatest gift to man - FREEDOM!

    No-one is free in Watchtower, but it will take time for your relatives to ever realise this. What is beyond question is the amount of courage you have shown to take the stand you have. It takes REAL courage to admit one's beliefs are wrong and to walk away from them. You knew what the outcome would likely be but you followed your convictions. You have everyone's profound respect for that here! We KNOW - REALLY KNOW - what you are going through.

    Continue to take courage, Brandon and Family, for you are now amongst thousands who share your situation. While we are thousands of miles apart geographically, this forum unites us together in an instant. There isn't a tear we cannot share together, nor an upbuilding moment. Your journey to freedom has just begun and we're here to make it that much easier. It's our privilege to have you among us and our love and friendship is completely unconditional.

    Love to you all,

    Ian, Claire and Boys

  • William Penwell
    William Penwell

    If it was me I would not meet with the JC. You have made your mind up and to meet with the JC you are saying you recognize their authority. I personally would not give them the satisfaction.

    Will

  • Dansk
    Dansk

    Brandon,

    If it was me I would not meet with the JC. You have made your mind up and to meet with the JC you are saying you recognize their authority. I personally would not give them the satisfaction.

    I agree with Will! We have read of so many others in your situation meeting with a JC and all it does is compound the problems, causing immense hurt. You must NOT recognise their authority. YOU must take control by ignoring the requests to meet with you. Believe me, you will never be free as long as you dance to the elders' tune.

    You already know Watchtower is baloney so why give it the satisfaction of recognising its officials? Believe me, I can't tell you how really free my wife, two boys and I are since we ignored Watchtower . I know people who are still living in fear of the elders - because they were/are unable to stand up and say "I don't recognise you!" Once you can say this in your heart you will be truly free.

    Yes, you will be shunned - but I'd rather be shunned for my convictions, which are true, than to cowtow to hypocrisy and be emotionally blackmailed.

    We're thinking of you and your family. We know your pain. By being strong you will send yet another warning message to Watchtower that people will no longer stand for its nonsense. Just one person leaving a congregation sends a ripple of fear into Watchtower. When a family leaves it sends a massive wave. By joining us here you're part of a hurricane.

    Love to you all,

    Ian & Family

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