Assistance would be appreciated

by Plato 29 Replies latest jw friends

  • Plato
    Plato

    Hello there. Guess some introduction would be nice, before anything.

    I’m a 17 year old men boy raised on a very liberal, highly intelectualized JW family. Currently very anxious on starting Medical school at a high ranked public university around here. My dad has the incredible feat of being an elder and having a PhD. I’m pretty darn happy as far as one could be, I guess. Satisfied with my individual formation and moral values that were set all around and, if I do say so myself, I think I’m suceeding on not being the average world jerk. But don’t worry, I’m not here quite to defend JW or the WT. Oh, yes, baptized.

    I don’t how I feel about this kind of forum. I mean, resentment is very tangible, to say the least. Bad elders seems to take a place quite a lot. I have as much reason to believe on what I see here as I have to, say, believe that WT is an unique organization. Oh my, conspiracy theories. The very concept of me posting here is absolutely stupid and dangerous.

    I shall do it anyway. I’m quite resolved on my belief in God and Christianism as a whole. By the way, if you’re an atheist and don’t know any of the teleological arguments or haven’t read summa theologic, I would advise to perhabs check these out. Regardless of that, I’m considering reavaluating WT organization with my family. I don’t quite know how though. Family goes all above else for me here. I know that disfellowship for me means dad not being an elder anymore and family as a whole getting, in the end of the day, shunned too. Not like our current congregation is that full of glee and warm anyway. I was wondering if anyone went or is going through the same as me and would like to share your thoughts or advices.

    Currently, some of the reasons justifiying my unsastifaction with JW are as follow: 1) Intellectual and emotional restraint. 2) “Wordly” (how disgusted I‘m from this world) association being restricted. 3) A few, in all honesty, doutrinal inconsistencies, such as dealing with pagan customs. 4) The overwhelmingly more interesting, complex, and well-thought theology there is out there in contrast to the increasing “simplify as much as you can” current mindset. 5) Disfellowship, but just kinda. 6) WT society self righteousness. Only 1) is a major thing on my life and on me as an individual. 2) isn’t too troublesome due to dad being reasonable, it refers more to a douctrine I’m not found of. Should I really be concerned on, most extreme scenario, leaving? Please, give me your opinion.

    Thank you for reading so far. It’s kind of a rambling, but it’s sincere. English is not our primary language here, so sorry for that too.

  • Ding
    Ding

    Regardless of that, I’m considering reevaluating WT organization with my family.

    Do any other members of your family show any interest in reevaluating the WT organization or are you the only one?

  • Doubting Bro
    Doubting Bro

    Your English is fantastic! May I ask what brought you here? FYI - born in as well, was an elder, have a family and PIMO (physically in, mentally out). In other words, I attend a congregation but don't believe in JW.

    Your reasons for being dissatisfied make sense. You certainly aren't seeing the bad side of the religion due to your parents (likely also born in) being reasonable.

    Way too soon to talk about leaving or not. Are your parent open to you getting a university education?

  • dubstepped
    dubstepped

    You mentioned that family came first, if I understood correctly (your English is great, by the way). If you question the beliefs you may not just end up shunned by the congregation, but by your family as well. You're young, and have a lot going for you. I think if you go down that path of questioning openly you could cause unnecessary distractions for this pivotal time in your life. You don't have to burn it all down if you have opportunities afforded to you by what seems like a very different JW existence than most. We've only seen but a fraction of your story above, so clearly we can only advise you so much, but it doesn't sound like anything is pushing you right now to burn it all to the ground.

    Oh, and welcome to the forum, from an atheist no less. ;)

  • Plato
    Plato

    Do any other members of your family show any interest in reevaluating the WT organization or are you the only one?

    As far as I know, I’m a solo ranger. My dad has already said to me that he wouldn’t necessarily comply to anything GB has to say, or even order, if it is not clearly stated in the Bible, though.

    Your English is fantastic! May I ask what brought you here? FYI - born in as well, was an elder, have a family and PIMO (physically in, mentally out). In other words, I attend a congregation but don't believe in JW.

    Your reasons for being dissatisfied make sense. You certainly aren't seeing the bad side of the religion due to your parents (likely also born in) being reasonable.

    Way too soon to talk about leaving or not. Are your parent open to you getting a university education?

    Thank you for your answer! I found this by browsing, really. May I ask you how it is to be PIMO?

    I appreciate my raising a lot. It is kind of difficult to be more critical due to that, I would say. Not to mention I’ve just overcome the increased heart frequency and cold sweat from merely peeping at these sites, LOL.

    Yeah, I would say so. Well, here is the thing: he has been incentivizing me and my sister this whole time to go to uni! He comes from a difficult background and he recognizes the value of education. All the family was very happy with my approval to study Medicine.

  • wannaexit
    wannaexit

    ’m a 17 year old men boy raised on a very liberal, highly intelectualized JW family. Currently very anxious on starting Medical school at a high ranked public university around here.

    What country starts medical school at 17?

  • Plato
    Plato

    You mentioned that family came first, if I understood correctly (your English is great, by the way). If you question the beliefs you may not just end up shunned by the congregation, but by your family as well. You're young, and have a lot going for you. I think if you go down that path of questioning openly you could cause unnecessary distractions for this pivotal time in your life. You don't have to burn it all down if you have opportunities afforded to you by what seems like a very different JW existence than most. We've only seen but a fraction of your story above, so clearly we can only advise you so much, but it doesn't sound like anything is pushing you right now to burn it all to the ground.

    To be fair, what I’ve written down from the story so far already made me uncomfortable. Might as well delete it all in a few minutes haha. Well, you absolutely got the point. I have difficulty to describe it, but even though one may even deem himself as happy, I guess one can’t deem it right to be on the wrong side of the matters. Ignorance is a bliss. Not to mention I’m waaaaaay lacking - at least atm- in what it may take to convince my father if it gets down to that. I should seize the moment, I suppose. It’s not like I’m suffering or anything.

    EDIT: Please, don’t take into account as if I’m hostile to atheists or anything. I just know there are many here, thought I might as well leave that there. Sorry :x

  • Plato
    Plato

    What country starts medical school at 17?

    Oh, screw it, I’m revealing. In Brazil it is possible. Medicine is a bachelor degree here, just like the Biology or Chemistry degree you would have to acquire first in the US. It’s not really like most people get to be approved this early, especially on a public uni, though.

    And I need 18 to legally get some Anatomy classes xd.

  • dubstepped
    dubstepped

    Oh man, trying to wake up family members or to open their eyes even a little bit to errors in the religion is a slippery slope. It is not only dangerous to yourself and your standing, but it is also largely ineffective. People tend to get defensive when these things are questioned because their identity is wrapped up in the organization. So you aren't just questioning something of a religion, you are questioning their very essence, their being.

    We've all been where you are, with that first post on a forum like this. At least you're waking up at just 17 years of age. I was in my late 30's before I woke up. I wasted so many years and endured so much pain. I remember the day when I asked my wife (we woke up together, gradually over years) if I could go on a site like this. I wanted to do it but didn't want to do so until she was ready to hear what I found. Isn't that silly? Isn't it silly that you have to feel this way about posting here? Does that show something about the religion that you're involved in? Of course it does. You know that though.

    I commend you on your courage to come here and ask your questions, to put forth your story a bit. It takes strength to be vulnerable. You live in an insular world where people don't often admit their weaknesses, where people are consumed with keeping up appearances so that they always look good for Jehovah, for the congregation, etc. It is largely a fake world. So much goes on behind closed doors in homes where they show up to the next meeting and make it look like everything is okay, maybe even get up and give a public talk on a Sunday. You are smart and if you keep that open mind you'll see more and more as you get older.

    There may be a time to burn it all down someday. There may not be such a time for you, who knows. Right now doesn't seem to be that time though. You can be awake and still work within your current framework until such a time as it truly causes you pain enough to make changes. You'll know when the time is right. You won't be able to keep your mouth shut anymore, lol.

  • Plato
    Plato

    Alright, you made me feel more at ease. Thank you for your kindness! I sure know how slippery it is. Soo far, it seems I’ve learned how to raise - or, rather, pick- questions without raising them back at me with the sudden change of subject we all know about. Might be just luck, though. I’m glad you were able to do it alongside your wife!

    God, I really to understand all this better.

    But really, it is all frightening and difficult territory here. After all, it is part of my identity too. But I think I will follow your advice on this. Not like I would be able to make a move instantly from here, lul. Thank you all so far!

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