There seems to be many jw's marrying outside of org recently. (page 2)

OutsiderLookingIn

I have to say something here. Reposting something I posted a few months ago: I often see this question (or some statement that JWs should date outside their small pool) and it strikes me as selfish and patently unfair to the unsuspecting non-JW on the other end. We don't know about all your rules and those that do wish we didn't.

I'm all for compatibility and finding your true love but quite honestly, there should be some qualifying test for JWs before they can date or marry non-JWs:

1. Do you still believe JWs have "the truth"?

2. Do you secretly look down on or feel sorry for the person because he or she is not a JW?

3. Are you dating this person out of rebellion or youthful indiscretion and will kick him/her to the curb once you "grow out of it"?

If you answered "yes" to any of these questions, please step away from the "worldly" person and let us be. Let us live out our sad, unfulfilled lives until we get killed at Armageddon

Newsflash: we're people too. We have feelings. We're looking for love and happiness, sometimes in the wrong places. We're well aware that there are bad apples out there but many of us learn discernment because we have to. We don't assume everyone is depraved, awful or immoral just because they're not a JW. We judge people as individuals.

I'm not encouraged by this "development" if it means some unsuspecting "worldly" has to deal with the secret world of JWs. Especially since we already know JWs feel very comfortable leaving out very important details...theocratic warfare and all If it makes for future ex-JWs, though, it's definitely something to consider.

TD

Human nature. ---Can't fight it.

Island Man

This is unavoidable given that the JW women outnumber the JW men by far. The disparity in the sexes among JWs is strong proof that it can't be the true religion. The true religion directed by God's spirit would appeal to both sexes roughly equally.

It is noteworthy too that the bible considers women to be more prone to sinful behavior than men. So if the JW religion was really all that its chocked up to be, it should be attracting more men than women.

But the truth is that men tend to be more logical and women tend to be more social and nurturing.Thus the JW religion, being illogical, is less appealing to men, but it provides a social atmosphere for women to socialize with each other. I think this is true of many other churches and religions. The JWs are just like the rest of christendom in this respect.

Getmeout

I don't know how to reply but regarding Outsiderlookingin's post. Good thing I said no to all three. I could carless for the religion.

James Mixon

Goood point Island Man, "true religion directed by God's spirit would appeal to both sexes".

steve2

Outsider Lookingin, Are you serious?

Since when have reason and logic over-ruled chemistry between two people? You speak as though the non-JW is an innocent victim when, for the most part, he/she is willfully blind. Likewise, it's more like the JW doesn't want their non-JW mate to become a Witness.

eyeuse2badub

They are 'forbidden' to marry any 'brother' who is over 23 and is not a MS or Tony will be pissed! When jesus' brother speaks, jw women listen! yea right!

just saying!

eyeuse2badub

atomant

1. Do you still believe JWs have "the truth"?

2. Do you secretly look down on or feel sorry for the person because he or she is not a JW?

3. Are you dating this person out of rebellion or youthful indiscretion and will kick him/her to the curb once you "grow out of it"? These are excellent valid reasons to ask oneself outsiderlookingin to anyone considering marriage outside.

OutsiderLookingIn

I am serious. I said unsuspecting. I think there's a very large segment of the population who know next to nothing about JWs. I certainly didn't beyond not celebrating birthdays. Even the door-to-door work was more of a running joke than something I saw firsthand. The few JWs I knew were polite and pleasant enough. If you don't know anything substantive, it seems like something you can just smooth out or that's not that big a deal.Then add that some (many?) JWs don't broadcast or even bother to mention that they're dubs. They just get you hooked and drop the news. Of course, everyone makes silly decisions in love, but the situation is complicated by a belief system that considers you evil just because you don't ascribe to it. That's a lot to fight against especially if you don't know all these factors are working against you.

I really do hope for true love and compatibility. I love love, but the JW factor makes it hard. If the JW really doesn't want their partner to become a witness, that's a plus. But how does that work on a daily basis? Can the JW life coexist with "normal" events in the life of a non-JW? That's not rhetorical; I really want to know.

Getmeout, sounds like you pass with flying colors :) Just remember, non-JWs aren't all the same. There are nice people and there are creeps too. But give people a chance...at least more than you ever did as a JW. We're all just trying to make it through this thing called life.

LongHairGal

I'm glad this is happening and nobody should be surprised. There are next to no men for Witness women past a certain age.

Any woman with a brain who is over 30 has to look outside. She'd have to be out of her mind to settle for the few single male oddballs that are in the religion.

The religion doesn't like when single women find a man outside the religion. They claim the woman will end up leaving the religion. However, I am of the opinion that the religion knows that once a single woman gets married, the nervy elders (and other users) can no longer go up to her and pester her to do favors!

I also believe that if the demographics were reversed and that IF there were more MEN than women, the hypocritical Witness religion would be singing a different tune about the whole marry in the Lord thing!..They would feel real sorry for all those lonely, needy men looking for a mate!

They'd get "new light" on the subject in a heartbeat!

There seems to be many jw's marrying outside of org recently.

Share this