After JW, do you hunger for all the things you didnt do..simple things

LyinEyes

Being raised a JW, I honestly did not know what a great big world we live in. All the places I never went to see, things I wanted to do,,,, because I figured , I will just do that when the New World gets here. There was always going to be FOREVER to do all the things that make life interesting.

I settled for the here and now as a good JW, meetings, field service, studying the same material over and over in the WT publications, and that was my life. God it was boring and empty.

Now that I have been freed I find myself hungering for so many things. I think alot of the hunger is because I realize I will not be on this earth forever, and who knows what is going to happen when we die right? SO I want to make the best of what life I have left on this earth instead of putting things on hold for the WT lie of living forever.

Many of the things I enjoy now are really simple.......reading books , especially classics,,,,,,and watching old movies that I never took ( or had the time) to watch. I dream of places I want to go and I am planning on going to see more of the things that I have never seen. Museums, art galleries, Yellowstone, Ireland, Broadway, a hockey game, Mardi Gras,,,,,,,,just things like that.

I know there are many witnesses who may have done these things but I didnt. With small kids ,pioneering, hubby being an elder,, it was hard to get away from the congregation for any time.

It is interesting to listen to other peoples ideas about life , their own philosophies on what they think life is about without having to preach the New World to them.

Sometimes I guess , I feel like a child just learning about so many things, like a sponge.

My oldest son has been in school for 2 years and the things he has learned about soooo many things, about subjects, people etc.iare so interesting. I doubt I will catch up with him on the knowledge he has learned already. I strongly encourage him to learn all he can, I wish I would have paid more attention in History class, but I never did because I figured everything I needed to know would be in the WT or Awake....lol.

So what things do you hunger for, long to do with the free time you have now ?

Swan

I realize how precious my free time is, and I resent, to some degree, time wasted just eking out a living. I spend it enjoying my husband, my dog, and just relaxing for the sake of relaxing. As a JW we always felt guilty about just doing nothing. Now I spend a lot of time doing that, guilt free. I sit and stare out the window and wonder and feel more alive by doing so than I ever did as a dub running here and there to get my time in, get my Wt studied, etc.

I also spend a lot of time this time of year just savoring the moment of the holidays. Every year they get better. I don't take them for granted like so many others seem to do. I work to make Christmas even better than the last, especially for the children, probably because I never got the childhood Christmas they now enjoy. I actually grow in appreciation each year and live the holidays vicariously through them as well as enjoying the holidays through my adult experience here and now.

Oh, and if you walk through the toy section at this time of year and hear every Elmo, Scooby Doo, and Rudolph singing out, that's because I was just there, and in a childish moment, pushed all of their buttons.

Tammy :-)

onintwo

Funny you should bring the topic up. Just yesterday I reflected on it. With the JW thing, your life was always on "hold". Why try to live your whole life in the "first 1/2" of a yardstick that extends forever" we were told. What bunk! But I bought it for 44 years. Except now, one important factor looms. My age! How do you get those years back?

Yesterday I reflected that I have good friends that I can discuss any topic with, not just the 'the truth' topics. I play golf, as often as three times a week (in the good weather.) I now plan for my retirement, not just blow it off because the New System will be here and obviate the need for cash. I have more interest in fixing up my home, not thinking that the effort is wasted, what with the New System pending.

I celebrate holidays, triumphs of my kids, my wife's accomplishments, etc. I now look for reasons to make any moment special. I am trying to develop traditions that we can cherish and pass on. I am interested in taking some classes on developing my voice so that I can sing like I always wanted to. I am a member of a book club, go to Kiwanis club meetings, golf club, Chamber of Commerce meetings, etc. In short, I have a re-newed interest in living life, and not just surviving until the end comes.

Onintwo

Billygoat

I find joy in the simplest of things. Listening to my cat purr. (Never allowed to have a pet.) Sleeping in on Saturdays. (Always out early in service.) Watching a scary movie snuggled up to my husband. (Yes, it's rated R too!) Drinking a glass of wine on the patio. (Drinking was allowed, but never in OUR family.) Smell of a sweet Avo with a nice glass of Canadian whiskey. (LOL! Yeah, like THAT would have happened.) Reading the Kama Sutra without blushing. (No, sex is not just a marital duty.) Listening to children laugh as they play. (Kids weren't supposed to be heard!)

Life is a gift. Like I mentioned in another post earlier today. It is to be savored. Too often we're rushing to the next moment, the next event, the next level. We miss so much of the NOW. The past is the past, the future is the future, that's why they call it the "present"...because that's what it is.

Sassy

Totally with you on this one LyinEyes. We did think we had forever to do things. As a matter of fact, if you took time out to do those 'things' now you were scolded or made to feel guilty about waisting precious time when you should be putting the kingdom first..

zanex

the simplest thing that I think I got from leaving the org was just that-the freedom to DO those things that I had hungered for...balancing those freedoms came much later..lol

La-Bellamargarita

After approximately three years away from dub-dom I am just beginning to get used to living a normal life, and to appreciating that this life is not a rehearsal. Unfortunately I was a Witness for twenty years, so as you can imagine I am not in my first flush... However, I am now doing my best to enjoy life. I am doing all those things that were frowned upon in "the Truth" because they took up time that should be spent knocking on doors, studying and attending meetings.

I try now to spend more time in contact with my extended family, siblings who live quite some distance away I now telephone on a regular basis. I have always been intersted in learning and so I have started a degree course in the humanities which takes up a great deal of my time, and which I enyoy enormously.

I suppose like many ex-witnesses I now feel a bit foolish about being deceived for so long, and where in the beginning I felt that the society was merely mistaken in its attitudes, things have happened in my life that have shown me that this is not really the case. I'm sure the society is well aware that much of what they teach is wrong, and those in control just want to stay in control. People like us are of no consequence whatsoever once we leave the fold - no matter how hard we have worked for them. Therefore all those feelings of guilt have gradually worn away and I am doing nice things for myself and for others - but not to "give a witness!!!"

la-bella

obiwan

I think focusing on the things that are important to me are first, you can never learn too much. After that I slowly spread my horizons, I think sticking close to the basics are important, that way you never lose who you are. Knowing one's self is the first step in finding out what you want in life.

Cheers Dede!!

Mystery

I agree with everyone.

The only problem I have now is telling my teenagers "you just don't know how well you have it - I never could........ (fill in just about any social activity)". It is difficult for me to let them do the things they want to do, because "I want" them to do it all; because i couldn't.

But I am fulfilling some of my "childhood wants"; I am involved with my sons. I coach & have not missed many games of any of their sports. Most of their friends call me "mom". I don't go on their dates ; maybe that is one "JW thing" I should have stayed with . "not letting them date until they were 30.

All and all, I like most of you, am living each day instead of existing; Billygoat stated one of my favorite saying, and I completely try to live it.

roybatty

After a loooong day at work, I enjoy being able to go home on a "meeting night" and just resting. Resting, playing with my kids, having a decent dinner and helping my kids with their homework. All because we don't have to rush out to the meeting. The thing that always cracked me up was the Society's "it's only 5 hours a week" slogan. Yeah, right. Did they ever try to get kids ready or have to make dinner? I think not.

Ahhh....just being more able to relaaaaaaxxx................ :)

After JW, do you hunger for all the things you didnt do..simple things

Share this