I Am a Christian

by Greenpalmtreestillmine 60 Replies latest jw friends

  • seven006
    seven006

    Biscuits,

    I don't date. But in the past I have dated bimbos as well as intelligent independent women with bumps of all sizes. That is why I do not date anymore. Iv chosen a life of sanity and non complicated psychological bliss that includes absolute control over my TV remote and toilet seat position. I choose this over sweater bumper pool and intelligent conversation by firelight or being forced to decide whether ones butt looks good in a pair of tight jeans or not.

    By keeping women as friends only, I find I can better appreciate how great they are, intelligent and creative they are while continuing to develop the highest level of respect I already have for them.

    To be quite honest, I scare them a hell of a lot more then they scare me. As Sigmund Freud once said "I have spent my life time studying the human psyche and the one thing I have never been able to answer is, what do women want." What guy can disagree with good old Siggie?

    It's a small, medium, and large sacrifice that I have learned to appreciate and accept. The only one who can force me out of this state of total enlightenment and back into a life of total brain mush and emotional schizophrenia is Sandra Bullock. So far she hasn't answered my phone calls.

    Life goes on.

    Dave

  • czarofmischief
    czarofmischief

    It's not that you aren't welcome, christian girls, it's just that you'd better be prepared to defend your beliefs. Because this is a discussion board. You can't just make a statement and expect everyone to agree with you. If you have been misquoted or misrepresented, you've got to cut and paste and point out where Dave screwed up. Which he does all the time.

    I'm a conservative in a land of liberal hippie peacemonger scum

    So, I just throw down and welcome the battle! To quote my boy, "Bring 'em on!"

    The point of a discussion is to fight and wrangle and score points and humiliate your opponents and watch them flee before you and hear the wailings of their women. (if they had any, which Dave doesn't)

    So, little Xtian girls, I know you are not used to verbal combat, but you'd better strap on those sandals and pick up your sword and shield and fight. Why do you believe what you believe? What has convinced you?

    And then you might learn a little something about your own beliefs.

    CZAR

  • Phoenix7
    Phoenix7

    Hey Sabrina. I just wanted to say that you're not alone here. If you ever need to talk to another Christian then give me a shout at any time.

    I am glade that you have found Jesus Christ. He is always there to listen to our problems wether we believe in him or not.

  • bisous
    bisous

    Double-Oh: read my PM. close eyes and imagine what non-verbal communication I might be performing upon reading this post. The possibilities are many, but only one is correct.

    your words sound really snappy, though.

    and YOU said you didn't understand why WOMEN talked about the remote control....you guys are so darn cute, dang close to irresistible.

  • seven006
    seven006

    B,

    Iv read your PM. I am a snappy guy.

    If one of your assumptions is I am gay, (Iv gotten that before cuz I don't date). I can assure you, I'm not, just in case your mind might be headed in that direction. I'm not saying your mind is, but just in case it is one of your assumed possibilities. I am also not afraid of women because of my evil ex-wife.

    I do not reveal what I do or who I may or may not do it with on a public discussions board or PM's or e-mails. That part of my life as well as a lot of other parts of my life I keep very private. Just because I don't date doesn't mean I do not have a special lady friend, or friends. My lady friend, or friends know where I am coming from and accept our friendship on an equally agreed upon and mutually desired and exclusive basis.

    I also have blow up dolls, and my good buddies Gumby and Minimus send me provocative photos of naked farm animals all the time.

    You just got to love pal's like that.

    Now...what was this thread about?

    Dave

  • bisous
    bisous

    yikes, heavens no. and you're spot on with your approach.

  • gumby
    gumby

    Dave....first I want to say something you missed in my second to the last post....this one...........

    http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/6/63993/983925/post.ashx#983925

    The comment about the mantel had to do with putting YOUR post on it.....not xena's pic....although she's gorgeous. That post I made was about your post.....this one

    http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/6/63993/983916/post.ashx#983916

    That was a masterpiece for this thread.

    Now that I'm done kissing your ass.......I need to know somethin ya stealin bastard! Craig promised me that used blow up doll of earnest Borgnine, and promised it to me next time I came to visit! Thanks for horning in on my goods butthead! I'd planned on using it awhile, then giving it to minimus next x-mas.

    Gumby

  • minimus
    minimus

    "photos of naked farm animals"........No, Dave. I sent you the pictures of them with clothes on.

  • Xena
    Xena
    photos of naked farm animals"........No, Dave. I sent you the pictures of them with clothes on.

    Why do I have the feeling my picture now has a sheep head on it and no clothing....the magic of photoshop eh Dave???

  • gumby
    gumby

    Never listen to a woman who likes to sleep in a wet spot!

    Gumby

Share this

Google+
Pinterest
Reddit