How far to bend over backwards??????????

by concerned mama 24 Replies latest jw friends

  • concerned mama
    concerned mama

    My husband and I are part owners of a company. The company Christmas party is this weekend. We DO NOT call it a Christmas party, we call it the "Holiday Gathering". We have employees of several religions and we try to make it comfortable for everyone. There won't be a christmas tree at the location we use. We may ask each other how the holidays went, but we don't decorate or make it seem Christmasy. Snowflake /blue and silver decorating theme. It is more of a employee recognition time, and a nice get together. It is pleasant and fun, but certainly not a wild and crazy, hard drinking type party.

    This year, for the first time a 20 years, we have a JW employee. A good worker, and someone we are pleased to have working for us. At this time, she has indicated that she won't be coming to the party. Which is fine, and up to her. One of the other partners feels that we should make her a special invitation calling it a "Winter Gathering". but I think that it is too late for that this year. In any case, she may not want to associate with us worldly people anyway.

    There are also little doorprizes and gift certificates (no Christmas wrap) that normally ONLY go to emplyees that attend the party. Is she entitled to anything like that if she misses the party for a religious reason?

    Opinions, please???????

  • Satanus
    Satanus

    I think you have already bent more than you need to, but it's your company.

    SS

  • dustyb
    dustyb

    i kinda suggest asking her why she doesn't want to come to the party. then if she brings up being a JW, ask her about it, how it is, whats goin on and try to learn more about her religion. make her a friend and welcome in the workplace and go from there.

  • concerned mama
    concerned mama

    Saintsatan, I kind of feel we have done what we could and at this point it is up to her. I agree with you.

    Dustyb, I don't work directly with her and have never met her. I have no way of building a relatonship with her. However, I do wonder if the most honest thing would be to just ask her if the word "holiday" was not in the invitation, if it would have made a difference to her.

  • Special K
    Special K

    I think you have done all that you can do tooooooooooo

    Remember, she is the "one" witness and you have lots more employees to think about as well... and you have already adjusted things somewhat...

    these are choices that she has to make for herself.

    When I was a J.W... I would not have went to your gathering as well..

    because of the so called "bad association"... with worldly people..

    sincerely

    Special K

  • maybesbabies
    maybesbabies

    Wow, mama, sounds like a great place, if you go to such lengths to make your employees happy!!! I would say, she probably won't come no matter what the invitation says, so just let it lie.

  • Lady Lee
    Lady Lee

    Well as a good little dub she isn't supposed to mix socially with non-JWs so she is taking her stand regardless of what you call it.

    I would leave it as is. And if any other non-Christian employee decided not to come would you even be asking the question?

  • Elsewhere
    Elsewhere

    If she is a good little JW then she will never mix company with the likes of you and the rest of your sinning co-workers. You are all bad association!

    ***

    w66 1/15 p. 49 Guard Against Bad Association ***

    However, when we seek the company of people outside the Christian congregation for recreation and relaxation, there is danger. Why voluntarily and willingly seek the association of those whose thoughts and actions are diametrically opposed to those of a dedicated Christian? This does not mean that a Christian could not or should not be friendly, kind and helpful toward all, whenever the opportunity affords. Paul told the Christians of his day: "As long as we have time favorable for it, let us work what is good toward all." (Gal. 6:10) It does mean, however, that a Christian would not spend time with unspiritually inclined people after work or school hours for pleasure and amusement.

    ***

    w93 8/1 pp. 18-19 Let No One Spoil Your Useful Habits ***

    12

    Paul would have recognized, though, the potential for "bad associations" in the workplace. We should too. Significantly, Paul quoted an attitude that prevailed among some: "Let us eat and drink, for tomorrow we are to die." (1 Corinthians 15:32) He immediately followed that with his fatherly counsel: "Do not be misled. Bad associations spoil useful habits." How might the workplace and the seeking of enjoyment be linked in creating a potential danger?

    13

    Christians want to be friendly with workmates, and many experiences bear out how effective this can be in opening the way for giving a witness. A fellow worker could misinterpret friendliness, however, as inviting association in order to have a good time together. He or she might extend a casual invitation to lunch, to a brief stop after work for a drink, or to some recreation on the weekend. This person might appear kind and clean-cut, and the invitation might seem innocent. Yet, Paul advises us: "Do not be misled."

    14

    Some Christians have been. They gradually developed a relaxed attitude toward association with workmates. Maybe it grew out of a common interest in a sport or a hobby. Or a non-Christian on the job might be exceptionally kind and thoughtful, which led to spending increasing amounts of time with that one, even preferring such company to that of some in the congregation. Then the association might lead to missing just one meeting. It could mean being out late one evening and breaking the pattern of sharing in the field ministry in the morning. It could result in watching a film or a video of a type that the Christian normally would refuse. ?Oh, that would never happen to me,? we might think. But most of those who have been misled may first have responded that way. We need to ask ourselves, ?Just how determined am I to apply Paul?s counsel??
  • Simon
    Simon

    It is a difficult time to be a JW. I remember the work-party invites and you never know what to do really. You want to go and socialise / join in with your work colleagues and friends but at the same time you know what you should and shouldn't be doing.

    Sounds like you ahve made it not a big issue and largely non-christmas but there's no telling how an individual witness will feel about it.

  • concerned mama
    concerned mama

    Thank you, everyone, for your feedback.

    Lady Lee, it isn't a huge company, and we do try to make everyone feel comfortable, so yes, we generally have some vague idea why people can't come. If it is something we can help with, we do. For example, we have learned to schedule around Ukranian Christmas, because several employees celebrate that with their families.

    Having said that, none of the other non-Christian employees have avoided coming in the past (no other JWs employed lately). We decided two years ago to change the name, since we have it in January, anyway.

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