Kleenex Head Covering

by jwundubbed 36 Replies latest jw experiences

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  jwundubbed

  JW land women wear the pants ,they just let men think they do - smiddy3

  I had to think about this for a while before replying. The reason is that I did see a lot of women who wore the pants in their own families. A few of these women actually did have some amount of power, and they were usually Elders' wives. Most of the women I knew who had some amount of lead in their personal lives were either abusive themselves or said nothing when people under them were abused (usually by their own husbands). Having gotten out of the cult and having learned a whole lot more about cycles of abuse and what abuse does and does not look like, I don't think that I can say that very many of those women actually wore the pants in their families. I think most of them appeared to take the lead while living very abused lives.

  I think that most of what I think or have thought I understood about JW interpersonal relationships is or was skewed and wasn't at all what I had thought it was at the time.
  
  
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  Diogenesister

  Having gotten out of the cult and having learned a whole lot more about cycles of abuse and what abuse does and does not look like,

  "Cycles of abuse" yes there certainly is a good deal of that in the org. Abusive women, certainly, abusive parent's - very, very definitely. And of course abusive husbands. However, there were also some very, very decent, good sorts in the org, of both sexes.

  The worst thing about the org is that their nonsense hierarchy and doctrines effectively gagged these good folks into saying nothing when they witnessed abusive behaviour and abuses of POWER.

  You know how the saying goes: All it takes for evil to thrive is for good men to do nothing!
  
  
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  MrRoboto

  Im PIMO and do next to nothing in the bORG but this literally makes me want to start a bible study so I can take a sister with and have her conduct it with some kind of covering - Just to show outsiders how ridiculous things can be - I wonder if they will want to have another study session after that..
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  LongHairGal

  WIZARD:

  Question: Do you still attend meetings? Just curious.

  I agree with your post. The religion is deserving of nothing and the Bible seriously has to go with all its misogyny and other cruelty.

  What you said struck a chord with me: the religion wants people to repress their feelings even if they are legitimately pissed at somebody. I always said the religion sets people up to be victims. They believe "acting Christian" means you should accept being victimized. You should be a glutton for punishment.

  I had no intention of being victimized by anybody there. All these unhealthy attitudes just added to the list of why I got out of the JW religion - and wearing a kleenex on my head is a stupidity I'll never be faced with!
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  Diogenesister

  On one of SBF threads about his experiences at other churches, we were talking about the Catholic church, a patriarchy if ever there was one. Yet alter girls out numbered the boys, women did the bible readings and there was even a women " master of ceremonies" of sorts, unsure of the official term.

  I mean it is traditional *within the physical church* for women to wear hats and men to take theirs off, but women don't don head coverings when doing religious things per sa ( taking a meeting or bible reading).

  So anyway the point I'm coming to is I came to the conclusion that Watchtower is the most sexiest Christian denomination - what does anyone think?

  Jwundubbed But I can't seem to get a job above a certain level even though I have the training for it. And when I really think about it a lot of ways in which we were treated as girls and women in the cult start to come up. I don't think I realized how much it all effected me.

  ,Hear, hear. Without a doubt it's your upbringing and the lack of self belief and confidence it engendered in you.
  
  
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  Diogenesister

  m PIMO and do next to nothing in the bORG but this literally makes me want to start a bible study so I can take a sister with and have her conduct it with some kind of covering - Just to show outsiders how ridiculous things can be - I wonder if they will want to have another study session after that

  Interestingly I've seen plenty of sisters take bible studies in their own home, with husband floating about, and they most definitely do not put on a head covering.

  Probably for this reason, as you say it's so ridiculous.
  
  
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  LisaRose

  Yes, some women did "wear the pants in the family" (which is, by the way, a sexist term), because we are all unique individuals. Some women just have stronger personalities, they are not going to be subservient no matter how much the organization tells them they should. It's a spectrum, just as some men are less stereotypically masculine.

  It doesn't change the fact that most women bought into the idea that they were less than and acted accordingly. I have been out of the cult for seventeen years and still have problems at times standing up for myself and expressing my needs, it's partly my nature and partly the teachings of the religion. Deep rooted beliefs like that work on an unconscious level and are very hard to overcome, I have made progress, but still have a ways to go.