Blond Joke

by Meg 15 Replies latest social humour

• 

  Meg

  As a trucker stops for a red light, a blonde catches up. She jumps out of her car, runs up to his truck, and knocks on the door. The trucker lowers the window, and she says "Hi, my name is Heather and you are losing some of your load."
  > >
  > > The trucker ignores her and proceeds down the street. When the truck stops for another red light, the girl catches up again. She jumps out of her car, runs up and knocks on the door. Again, the trucker lowers the window. As if they've never spoken, the blonde says brightly, "Hi my name is Heather, and you are losing some of your load!"
  > >
  > > Shaking his head, the trucker ignores her again and continues down the street. At the third red light, the same thing happens again. All out of breath, the blonde gets out of her car, runs up, knocks on the truck
  door.

  The trucker lowers the window. Again she says "Hi, my name is Heather, and you are losing some of your load!"
  
  > > When the light turns green the trucker revs up and races to the next light.
  > > When he stops this time, he hurriedly gets out of the truck, and runs back to the blonde. He knocks on her window, and as she lowers it, he says...
  
  > > "Hi, my name is Kevin, it's winter in Michigan, and I'm driving the damn
  > > SALT TRUCK!"
• 

  Yerusalyim

  LMAO!
• 

  Country_Woman

  lol
• 

  mpatrick

  too funny!
• 

  stillajwexelder

  why do blondes only have 15 minutes for lunch?

  Saves on the re-training costs
• 

  SpunkyChick

  hehe these are cute!
• 

  Badger

  It got Spunky Blonde's approval!

  or:

  Thre pregnant women are at a bus stop: a brunette, a redhead and a blonde. he redhead and brunette begin talking:

  Redhead: Is yours a boy or a girl?

  Brunette: A boy. My husband and I did it with him on top. And yours?

  Redhead: Mine's a girl. We did it with me on top.

  <Blonde begins to cry>

  Redhead: What's wrong, honey?

  Blonde: (sobs) I don't want puppies!
• 

  rocketman

  Oh those crazy blondes!
• 

  Elsewhere

  Q: Why'd the blonde get fired from the M&M factory?

  A: She kept throwing out all the W's.

  =====

  A blind man walks in to a bar and orders a drink. He takes one sip and senses that everyone is staring at him. In order to brake the ice he says, "Would you like to hear a good blonde joke?"

  The bar tender says, "I think you should know before you tell this joke that I am a blonde, there are 7 bikers in the corner that are blond and, there is a 6'5" 290lbs. weight lifter working the other end of the bar who is also blonde. You still want to tell the joke?"

  The blind man says, "Your right, who wants to explain a joke 9 times?"

  =====

  A redhead, a brunette, and a blond are in the ladies room of a very old theatre when the mirror begins to speak. The mirror says that it only comes out once every hundred years and that it grants noble wishes. It clarifies, "I will only grant a wish that portrays what you truly believe, if you tell one lie you will instantly disappear."

  The brunette steps forward and says, "I think that all children should have enough to eat." Because the mirror knew that this is what the girl really believed in the wish was granted.

  The redhead steps forward and says, "I think that there should be world peace." Because the mirror knew that this is what the girl really believed in the wish was granted.

  Lastly, the blonde stepped forward and said, "Golly, I guess I think..." Whap!! she disappeared.
• 

  Gretchen956

  A lady is having a new house built. The day comes when she does the walk-through with the contractor to choose her paint colors. As they enter the first room she says, "I would like this room to be a soft butter yellow just like this paint chip." The contractor scribbles hurridly on his clipboard and then runs over to the window, throws it open, leans out and yells, "GREEN SIDE UP!!!!"

  The woman looks at him funny but they continue on to the next room. She says, this room should be a robins egg blue, here, I have a scrap of fabric for you. The contractor scribbles it down furiously on his clipboard and races to the window of the second room, throwing it up, leaning out and screams at the top of his lungs, "GREEN SIDE UP!!!!!"

  The woman is looking very confused, but on they go to the next room. She says, hesitantly, "I would just like this room a creamy off-white, I'll leave the exact shade up to you." Once again the contractor scribbles it on the clipboard, runs to the window, throws it up, leans out and yells, "GREEN SIDE UP!!!!"

  The woman has had enough. She stomps her foot down, puts one hand on her hip and gives him the look. "All right I want to know exactly what is going on. We have gone into three different rooms, I have given you three separate colors. You write them down and then go scream 'green side up' out of the window! What is going on?"

  The contractor says to her, "I'm sorry ma'am, it has absolutely nothing to do with the paint color, I have a team of blonds out laying sod."