Warning: I am about to discuss a rather delicate subject. If the words “menstruation” or “period” gross you out, please stop reading now.
I am going to attempt to keep names out of this discussion, as my thoughts are directed to the general population, not one individual. I am fairly certain, however, that someone may take this personally and react with anger and insults. I hope this is not the case, as I do not have a grudge against any person, nor do I wish to be caught up in an exchange of personal attacks. If I fail to respond to personal insults, it is not because you have bested me, or I am afraid of you, or I can’t stand the heat; it is simply that I do not wish to waste my time with such futility.
Some history on what lead up to my desire to write today: not long ago, a poster suggested I was emotional or irrational because of my monthly cycle. I was somewhat taken aback by the harsh tone of the post. Was the insult provoked? Possibly…I had made what I felt was a gently humorous comment on the way the poster structured a sentence, perhaps having a chuckle at their expense. From the instant and hostile nature of the replies, it was obvious I had touched a nerve. The insults continued, even on threads where I was not a participant. I have had no past conflict with this individual and have no reason to have negative feelings towards him/her. I was not angry at the poster, as anger would imply I cared one way or the other what they thought about me, but I was annoyed even some days later. The reason for my annoyance became focused recently in a chat where someone (a male) mentioned how inappropriate it is for men to use women’s hormones as a justification to discount their opinions.
It then struck me why I took this insult more seriously than most. It goes to some very important issues and I address my comments to anyone out there who might make an off-handed remark without thinking. Please be assured, I am not without a sense of humor on the subject of women’s ailments. I’ve laughed at and passed on such jokes as: “Why do we call it PMS? Because Mad Cow Disease was already taken.” However, to make an insulting comment to a woman you do not know about her personal cycle is completely inappropriate. If any of you men don’t believe me, ask your wives, sisters, girlfriends, or mothers. (Gentlemen, please use caution how you phrase such a question if you value your…well, you know.)
To suggest a woman should not speak, act, think or offer an opinion because of her biology is not just insulting, it is dangerous. This very type of thinking has kept women from holding responsible positions for thousands of years. “Oh, we can’t have a woman in the Pentagon, she might push the wrong button if she gets cranky.” Thankfully, this type of discrimination is slowly diminishing in most developed nations, but is still rampant in much of the world. Are women any less a slave to their bodies than men? How many lives have been lost because men let their hormones interfere with their reasoning? We must play fair, if we are going to be using a broad stroke to deride an entire gender.
Such conditions as PMS and postpartum blues are serious problems for many women. For millions of others, the days of the month go by pretty much the same, except for a minor inconvenience and some extra dollars spent at the drug store. Due to a fairly healthy and active lifestyle, I am fortunate to have lived my life in the latter category. I have never experienced the debilitating conditions many of my female friends have, but even if I did, my ability to function in society should not be questioned.
I respectfully ask that you think of this as you would a race issue. Yes, some ethnic jokes are funny and I am ashamed to admit having told a few in my life. However, to seriously suggest you can predict a person’s conduct (usually negative) because they are Black, Irish, Polish, Arabic, Jewish, Southern, or Menstruating is inaccurate and hateful.
Thank you for your patience in dealing with a touchy subject.