SPREAD THE GOOD NEWS!

Yerusalyim

Hip Hip Hurray!!!! (I wasn't aware this was an issue...what did I miss?)

Puternut

Sounds like Finger Licking good news to me

Xandria

So you are not a chicken choker...

Mannnn.. what a

X

commited mur-didly-urder!
I AM A CHICKEN KILLER!

No this is not a euphimism for masturbation.

So with my parents gone my job is not only to use up 12 condoms, but to also tend the lesbian chickens.

That's right, you heard me. Lesbian chickens. There is no rooster so my friend asked me if the chickens ever had sex, to which I said, "Only if it's a giant lesbian chicken orgy." So if I start a rock band we shall be known as the "Lesbian Chickens"...you know, milk all that Dixie Chick fame. I don't think any copywrite would be infringed upon.

So this is my duty. Tend the lesbian chickens. Harvest their children and feed them to my aunt, uncle, and grandmother. I don't believe in eating lesbian chicken goop, but to each their own.

Today I went out as usual to harvest the children and noticed the water bucket tipped over...and chicken legs poking from underneath it. Picture if you will the scene from the Wizard of Oz with the wicked witch of the East's legs poking from under the farm house. Replace the legs with chicken legs (and get rid of those ruby slippers) and you pretty much have the scene I walked in on.

Perhaps she was sleeping. She curled up for a little nappy nap under the water bucket? My heart sank. Unless chickens sleep with their eyes crossed and tounges hanging out I am screwed.

All of the water had poured out. So I re-filled it. The other remaining lesbians were all very thirsty and pretty much stood on their fallen sister in order to drink, so at least it put to rest my fear that the surviving five would be traumatized.

My mother is going to be so pissed. These are her lesbian chickens. It is her little endeavor. She knows damn well I hate these little mother cluckers, it's going to look like murder to her, not an accident.

And me without an alibi!

I'm also suppsed to water the plants while my parents are gone. Hopefully I fare better with the ivy.

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The update today:

I called my mom and told her the bad news...apparently that chicken had been coughing and weezing a lot and she wasn't sure it would live long...

PS. THANKS FOR TELLING ME THAT!

SPREAD THE GOOD NEWS!

joannadandy

arrowstar

Yerusalyim

Puternut

Xandria

joannadandy

Sirius Dogma

Xandria

shamus

Yerusalyim

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