Nice encounter with a JDub

BoozeRunner

Hey folks, I havent posted in a while, but this experience was worth telling.

Last Wednesday while at work (a family retail shoe store),. an older sister from my last congregation came in to make a purchase. Mind you, I was DF'd in 1996, and went to my last meeting sometime in early 1997. I recognized her face right away, and was a bit apprehensive. I was hoping she didnt recognize me, but right away she commented that I looked familiar. I asked her name, and then told her that I was formerly in her congregation. I let her know I wasnt involved with JWs anymore. It was probably obvious anyway, with the overgrown facial hair and the earring I wear.

I recommended a good sneaker for her, and as she was trying them on, I asked about my best friend, an elder from the congregation. She responded that he and his family was doing well, and her family as well. She detailed some JW stuff, i.e., pioneering, the location of the book study, etc. All through the conversation about sneakers, and my friend, she was very cordial and from what I could gather, genuinely friendly, and didnt treat me as if I had the PLAGUE. She completed her purchase and I wished her a very happy vacation - she needed the new kicks for a cruise shes going on in about 2 weeks.

Perhaps a case of "more flies w/ honey than vinegar"? She did make sure to mention that my best friend was conducting the book study at the KH instead of his home as he did years ago. Was that a subtle invite?

No matter what, it was nice to have a positive encounter rather than avoidance. Actually, it wouldnt have mattered to me as I havent let that stuff get to me for several years.

Anyone else have a positive encounter since leaving or being DF'd?

Boozy

seeitallclearlynow

I think that sister was giving you a subtle invitation, hoping the connection with your elder friend would draw you.

I believe a lot of the friends want to be kind and natural, but are taught they will be disloyal to Jehovah if they treat DF'd and especially DA'd people like human beings. But I've noticed that a lot of Witnesses are pretty loose with the shunning rules, and that is a very good sign. When my son was disfellowshipped, an awful lot of people wanted to talk to him and smile and wink at him. Admittedly, he was a teenager, and a lot of people are understanding about teenagers' problems. But still....

Maybe there's hope, or maybe the DevilBorg will crack down further on their robots. Time will tell.

In a work/customer service situation, the rules are not as strict, and I know that I, for one, took advantage of the loophole when on the opposite side of the fence - any shunning victims who came to my store or my table when I was a foodserver got extra friendly service!

outnfree

(((((((Boozy!)))))))) So nice to "see" you!

I agree with talesin that sometimes being in a customer/retailer environment smoothes things over. I have had a few nice encounters with a sister from my old hall while going through the supermarket check-out. Since her father was the elder who treated me like a human being when we ran into one another in a hospital waiting room (not overly friendly, but didn't pretend he didn't know me), I'm not sure if it's her upbringing or the work or just the fact that we were pretty close at one time. She's pleasant and takes the initiative to ask after the family. So I enquired about hers and that's probably the most I know about anyone from my former hall.

Keep well! outnfree

techton

My daughter was df'd in 95... at the time, the CO and I were selling cars together on the side... he told me I could still talk to her, that not all circumstances are the same, exceptions could be made.....some of the cong. complained then, but there was nothing they could do

Yerusalyim

Some, perhaps even many JW's are genuinely nice people...and some won't let the Borg get in the way of that...especially older ones. I feel certain that she was sending a subtle invite...which was probably done with genuine concern...by the same token, she did it in a non-confrontational way.

Nathan Natas

Sounds as though this older sister is practicing the "old-time" (Russellite) Christianity and has somehow missed out on the judgementalism of Rutherford/Knorr and the rest. I think it is possible that there are bunches of people like her in the congregations - people who "lie low" and don't reach out for positions of authority over others. Unfortunately, their quiet manner is drowned out by the parents beating their kids in the back of the hall, beating their kids to death at home (physically or emotionally) or strutting around like they're King of the Hill because they get to "serve" by handing someone a microphone. As you might expect, the further up the org chart you climb, the fewer of these gentle, kind, quiet ones you find.

BoozeRunner

I believe a lot of the friends want to be kind and natural, but are taught they will be disloyal to Jehovah if they treat DF'd and especially DA'd people like human beings.

That is so true. Many are friendly inside, but let the Borg way rule their natural instincts. I do believe she was putting forth a subtle invite, due to the fact that I asked about my elder friend and his family.

Outnfree, nice to see you also.

Boozy

shamus

I had a couple of "sisters" come to the door at my sisters place, and I told them no thanks, I used to be one. They were polite, and asked if they could "send the brothers" to talk to me.

I said no thanks.

No anger, nothing. They were just being friendly, and there was no need to go "aposto-crazy" like the WTBTS says I should have.

Kind words and actions mean more than getting all pissy with people.

Farkel

boozy,

: I recommended a good sneaker for her, and as she was trying them on, I asked about my best friend, an elder from the congregation. She responded that he and his family was doing well, and her family as well. She detailed some JW stuff, i.e., pioneering, the location of the book study, etc. All through the conversation about sneakers, and my friend, she was very cordial and from what I could gather, genuinely friendly, and didnt treat me as if I had the PLAGUE. She completed her purchase and I wished her a very happy vacation - she needed the new kicks for a cruise shes going on in about 2 weeks.

This is good news and just confirms what I've been hearing from my own sources. More and more, dubs are not listening to their religious masters and are just doing what they feel is the best thing to do for themselves. Dub kids are having sex and getting away with it. They're smoking pot (and other stuff) and getting away with it. Adultery is common. Many are living double lives. The WTS is becoming a sham of rank-and-file hypocricy. (It's about TIME. The WTS leaders have been hypocrites for many DECADES!)

If this trend continues, the WTS is doomed. Once they lose their absolute power over their followers, they have two choices: reform or go bankrupt. They will reform. They don't want to lose their cushy jobs or cushy retirement.

There must be a lot of angst in the Service Department these days as such stories keep coming in. The days of WTS Fascism are nearing its end. Yes, they will always have dupes to represent them, but those dupes will increasingly represent the dregs of humankind. (Translation: "losers with an attitude") They cannot sustain a viable religion with only such people.

The WTS leaders have the most to lose in this deal. Therefore, they have the most to gain by "reforming" in this deal. They will. They will somehow blame their dupes for the very problems they themselves created, and somehow keep those same dupes by proclaiming they had a new "insight" from the very God Jehovah Himself that caused them to go mainstream when seven decades ago they swore they would never do that.

Hide and watch. This WILL happen, and if it doesn't, the WTS will go into the same toilet the Millerites visited some 140 years ago.

Farkel

Lady_Kaye

Farkel , I agree with you. Oneday

Nice encounter with a JDub

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